Chapter 51
ELIVANDER
Never’s heart picks up, sending mine catapulting through my chest at the same frantic speed. “She’s scared. Probably in danger.”
Milo peers around the next corner in the passage then turns back to me with a long sigh. “Of course she is. She’s snooping around the Underbroke. And all of us have been in danger since she showed up months ago.”
I slam a hand into his chest. His back smacks the wall, a harsh breath forced out. “You sent her off with a child as her only protection.”
Hold it in, Kelter says, his voice hoarse and strained in my head.
Milo grimaces, but it’s sorrow that stings behind his gaze, not pain. “I did, then you finally agreed you wouldn’t have been able to keep your hands off her long enough to make it to Zandrite’s chamber.”
“Let him go,” Kaleida says gently.
I had to explain as much as I could to her once she saw my struggle to hold back.
One by one I’m letting them see what’s behind my light side that the curse shows them.
I’ve got issues and can’t die until I have a son, I told Kaleida.
You’re only my friend because I’m cursed.
Kelter won’t get out of my godsdamn head.
He’s got issues too, and now I might kill you.
Zandrite wants to kill Never, and she’s the only one who can kill him so I can have his essence.
Kaleida nodded slowly. Well, that explains a lot. And nothing at all.
Milo filled in the rest of the details as we snuck from one passage to the next.
I press harder into him. “Wouldn’t fucking her along the way be better than me killing one of you? I can’t contain this.” Violence pumps through me like venom. I want to push so hard his ribs crack and pierce his heart. Much longer, and I’m not sure I’ll be able to stop myself.
Kaleida reaches between us and rests her hand on my wrist, then rips it away. “Why are you so cold?”
“You’ve never felt that before?”
“No.” She returns her hand and tugs softly, urging me to let up. “You’re freezing. Are you okay?”
I pull back from Milo, my body tight, chest collapsing. “If I asked you to kill Milo right now, would you do it?”
“What? No.”
I have to know. I can stop her if I need to. “Kill him.” Milo’s eyes go wide, blue discs that beg me to reconsider.
“No, get your head out of your ass and focus. What makes you think I would do that?”
I grab my ear, panicking at her refusal, Never’s fear still flooding me. “Because not long ago, you would have. Milo said he explained the curse to you.”
Her brows rise, widening her brown eyes and exposing the hesitancy in them. “Yes, but I would never hurt him.”
“You would have if I told you to. Something’s changing.” I recall what Never said about the curse, how my dark and light sides are combining. Wasn’t that only with her? I hold back Kelter’s cravings with fists at my sides. “I think Never is breaking the curse. She sees past it.”
The closer she gets to loving you, the more your two sides blend together, Kelter says, pulling from my memories, every detail in my head available in his. I’ve always felt your dark side, but it’s fading. Which means the first half of the curse is weakening. Both halves can’t exist at once.
And the only way the first half could break and eliminate my dark and light sides is if I let her love me and trigger the second half, and that’s the last thing I want to do, I finish for him, but he already knows.
Like he knows everything about me and my past. And why are you so good at seeing and hearing everything I try to hide, but I can’t do the same when you block me?
I have a need for connection, if you recall, he says mockingly. And I’m good at achieving it.
You’re good at pissing me off.
Kelter sighs into my mind. You need to let her go. Send her to Caldera, and tell her not to come back. I’d rather see her heartbroken than the second half of the curse triggered.
Nothing could make me let go of her heart, I say.
The gods chose her for me. Doesn’t that matter to you?
They could link her a thousand times over, and she’d still choose me.
Because you’d never let her love anyone else. His accusation shifts to anger. Are you controlling her feelings toward me too? Are you keeping her from loving me?
I shudder. That doesn’t matter. Her heart is safe in my hands.
What if you screw this up like everything else?
I have everything under control.
“Romantic that she sees past your curse and all, my friend, but we need to keep going.” Milo slaps my back, and I almost bash his head into the wall.
Good control there, brother. Kelter slathers the sarcasm on thick.
The passages are mostly abandoned at this hour with the Half Links preparing for the Scrape in their living quarters.
Which means the men are hoping for a chance to fight so they can choose a Trophy, and the women are fighting over which of them is most worthy.
I got sick of listening to conversations from rooms and floors away, but I had to hear it all to learn how this place operates now. And protect Never.
We slip around another corner and press our backs flush to the passage wall. Which way? I ask Kelter.
This is your last chance to find Ever and get out of here. You’re risking her life.
I slap my hands on the dirt wall behind me. You’re risking her life by not helping me. She’s already on her way to you.
Good thing I’m chained to a wall. I don’t know if I could stop myself from killing at this point.
“Godsdammit.”
“What?” Milo asks.
I advance down the passage, my legs almost wobbly from Kelter’s cravings, the need pumping through me. The need to kill with bare hands. The need for blood. And stronger every second—the need to be with Never. I’ve never needed someone as much as my body requires her now.
With my hearing, I should be able to find the way, but her terrified heart takes mine over.
I can barely think straight. Every left and right turn looks the same.
Every sound echoes off the walls. But the scent of death—it’s easy to follow.
And potent as fuck. “We have to get there before she does. I don’t want her facing Zandrite alone. ” Or Kelter.
Why can’t you listen to me for once? Get her out of here, he begs.
I told you I can protect her.
The smack of his head against marble rings through my brain. He pushes all his frustration at me, tightening my muscles, my jaw. Godsdammit, Eli. Promise me, whatever you do, don’t unchain me.