Chapter 26
“Iwas madly in love with Merritt Hardwick—had been since high school,” Reva told Kellen.
Kellen’s eyebrows lifted. “The political guy who just got busted for financial crimes?”
She nodded. “Yes, that one.”
“Wow.” He shook his head, the look on his face punctuating his astonishment.
Reva inhaled deeply, her voice now tinged with nostalgia. “Merritt set off for Harvard right after graduation, while I made my way to Tulane. Yet, our connection remained. We talked every day by phone. I never dated anyone else. To my knowledge, neither did he. Our summers were spent reunited in Wyoming, where we were virtually inseparable, only parting when the inevitability of fall sent us back to our respective paths.”
Her gaze drifted to the horizon. “Our story took a slight turn when Merritt embarked on his journey to law school. That’s when he plunged into the political realm, securing an internship with our state senator. Politics consumed him, his ambitions soaring to the heights of envisioning us as the nation’s first couple, nestled in the White House.” A faint smile graced her lips at the thought.
“I take it that was not your dream,” Kellen prompted.
Reva shook her head. “No. I can’t imagine anything worse than residing in our nation’s capital city among those who make politics their world.”
“But you chose to stay here in Thunder Mountain, eventually stepping into the role of mayor?”
“Exactly.Washington, D.C. never called to me. This…” she gestured to the vast landscape enveloping them, “These mountains are where my heart belongs—my home. I could never find fulfillment anywhere else.”
They sat in silence for several seconds before Kellen turned to her. “Life is a series of choices.”
Reva nodded. “Yes, and Merritt left me.”
“Well, the decision was mutual. Right?”
She frowned. “I’m not following.”
Kellen gave a slight shrug of his shoulders. “You left him as well. You chose to remain in Wyoming instead of going with him.”
The comment ruffled. “I’m not sure that’s true. I was madly in love with him,” she argued. “And had been for as long as I could remember. We had a deep and lengthy history. It was Merritt who first kissed me. Merritt who snuck in my window at night to study, even though my parents were sticklers about us never being alone in the house without supervision. He was the one who held my hand at my dad’s funeral. And it was Merritt who urged me to open my law practice—and later, to step into the role of mayor.”
She heard her voice tremble as she added, “I was in a dark place after Merritt left. I numbed my pain with alcohol, a habit I now have under control, but losing him…well, I lost a part of myself.”
“Then why didn’t you go with him?” Kellen asked gently.
“Are you suggesting I made a mistake?”
“Not at all. I’m merely highlighting that we all make choices—good, bad, and indifferent. Those choices pave the path to our future. You weren’t a victim of the relationship if both of you opted to move on without each other.”
Reva’s gaze lingered on the blue sky before settling back on Kellen. “You really don’t mince words, do you?” She exhaled deeply. “There”s truth in what you say. The unfortunate reality is, at times, you’re presented with decisions where all options lead to loss.”
Kellen looked at her with those dark chocolate eyes as if he could see into her soul. The scrutiny made her uncomfortable.
“Yeah, I’ll give you that,” he agreed. “It’s messy to love after heartbreak. Moving on is painful and it forces you to be honest with yourself about who you are…and what you want.”
“Your turn,” she challenged, trying to move on. “What’s the story behind you being middle-aged and single?”
That made him chuckle. “Ouch! Middle-aged? I’m only in my forties.”
“Well, unless you plan on gracing this earth until you’re one-hundred and twenty, then, yes, middle-aged.”
Their exchange, tinged with humor, momentarily lifted the heaviness of the conversation. Yet, Reva’s curiosity had been piqued. She wondered about the experiences that had shaped him, the ones he alluded to with his understanding of love and pain.
He had a story, and she was anxious to hear it.
Kellen was now looking right at her. “I was twenty-six when I married Liz. She was the love of my life.”
“What happened?” Reva asked, searching his expression for answers.
In a quiet, somber tone, Kellen began to recount a chapter of his life she suspected he seldom opened. “She was always so vibrant, you know? Even when the doctors diagnosed her with severe coronary heart disease, she faced it with a bravery that made you believe she was invincible.”
He paused, seeming to collect his thoughts as if to weave them into a narrative worthy of her memory. “The doctors recommended Coronary Artery Bypass Grafting, CABG. It was supposed to be her way back to a normal life, to alleviate the angina that had been shadowing her every step, to restore the flow of life through her veins.”
A wistful smile flickered across his face, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “She knew the risks. We both did. But the chance to reclaim a piece of herself, to no longer be defined by the limitations of her condition, was a siren call she couldn’t resist.”
Kellen’s gaze drifted, focusing on a memory only he could see. “The surgery…it was supposed to be routine, but complications arose. An unrelenting infection led to more surgeries and more hospital nights than we cared to count. Each visit, each procedure, I saw less of her. Not just physically, but the spark that made Liz ‘her’ started to dim.”
He let out a long, deep sigh, a testimony to the weight of his words. “In the end, it was her heart that gave out. Not from the disease it bore, but from the battle to fix it. Her decision to move forward with that corrective surgery, it…it cost her everything.”
Kellen looked at her then, his eyes saturated with emotion. “That night, I sat on my porch and cried. She was only thirty years old. A day doesn’t pass that I don’t realize I’m a better man because of how she loved me.”
Reva listened, her heart heavy, as Kellen’s words painted a vivid, poignant picture of love, hope, and loss. As he concluded, a profound silence enveloped them, the kind that speaks volumes, carrying with it a shared sorrow.
She reached across the small space that separated them, her hand finding his in the water, a gesture of comfort and understanding. Brimming with empathy, her eyes met his. “Kellen,” she began, her voice barely above a whisper, laced with the depth of emotion his story had stirred within her. “I…I’m so sorry. For your loss, for the pain you’ve endured. It’s unfair, the way life can unravel, taking with it the dreams and hopes we most hold dear.”
Reva’s heart ached for him, for the love he had lost and the burden of grief he carried. “Your love for her, it’s evident in every word you speak, in the way you honor her memory. Your words are a testament to your wife—beautiful, yet heartbreakingly sad.”
She squeezed his hand gently, a silent promise of her presence, her support. “I can’t begin to imagine the depth of your pain, but please know, I’m here for you. In this moment, in any moment you need a friend, a listening ear.”
Reva’s perspective on Kellen started to change. He wasn’t just a straightforward kind of guy who was good with his hands; he was thoughtful and complex, with a depth to him that she hadn’t noticed before.
Tears, unbidden, welled up in her eyes, not just for Kellen’s loss, but for the profound connection they were forging in the shared vulnerability of this conversation. “Thank you for trusting me with her story, with your feelings. It means more than you know.”
It dawned on her that Kellen was right. Hiding only robbed you of intimacy. The deepest human connections are forged in these moments of raw openness, where hearts are laid bare. And for the first time in what felt like an eternity, she found herself yearning to connect with a man on a level she never anticipated.
Reva had never revealed the entirety of her soul without hiding—not with Merritt, and not even with her girlfriends.
When she least expected, her world shifted.
Kellen felt something, too. She could tell.
“You know,” he said. “You can be lonely even when you’re with a lot of people, even when the busyness acts like a shell.”
His comment pierced and left her unable to speak.
“I’m lonely, too,” he said. “What say we try to shed this isolation together?”
Reva hoped Kellen couldn’t see her heart pounding against her chest. Before she could answer, he closed the space between them and kissed her slowly.
Her stomach tightened. She was powerless against the emotions raging inside her. His lips against her own felt wonderful and terrible and scary.
She was heading into unknown territory. If she moved forward, it would be difficult to stop.
She didn’t want to.
Without another thought, Reva laid her palm against his face and heard his intake of breath before he deepened the kiss, pulling her closer, and making her head spin. His movements were sure and slow, like everything he did.
For a brief few seconds, she allowed herself to drift away from the demands of those who relied on her, the looming projects on her agenda, and the countless nights spent in solitude.
There were moments in life when it seemed as though the divine playfully stepped in to dazzle and delight. This was undeniably one of those moments. Occasionally, life’s joy was so overwhelming that it seemed impossible to hold all the happiness within.
She’d been handed two grand gifts. First, it had been Lucan who arrived on the scene out of nowhere—now Kellen.
She was indeed a woman immensely blessed.