Chapter 37 Almost Gone
Almost Gone
By mid-afternoon, she was back at the Monroe house, standing in the middle of her bedroom, staring at the suitcase that felt like a death sentence.
The room smelled the same. Looked the same. Felt the same.
But she didn’t.
Savannah had packed and unpacked twice already, like somehow dragging out the process would change something. Like maybe if she just kept stalling, the universe would intervene.
But it wouldn’t.
No matter how much she tried to delay it, time kept moving forward, shoving her closer and closer to the inevitable.
And God, it hurt.
Mallory sat on the edge of the bed, arms crossed, watching her with an expression that wasn’t just concern anymore. It was frustration.
It was rage.
"You don’t have to do this."
Savannah sighed, pressing her fingers to her temples. "Yes, I do."
Mallory shot up from the bed so fast it made Savannah jump.
"Why?"
The word cracked in the air between them, full of desperation, full of something frantic and pleading.
Savannah turned to face her, and the sheer intensity in Mallory’s eyes made her stomach twist.
Because she didn’t have an answer.
Because this was never supposed to be permanent.
Because what if this wasn’t real?
Because what if it was?
She inhaled sharply, shaking her head, trying to convince herself. "Because it’s temporary."
Mallory scoffed, her arms flying into the air as she paced the room, exhaling in disgusted disbelief. "Bullshit."
Savannah flinched.
"You think I don’t see it?" Mallory snapped, whirling on her, eyes blazing. "You think I haven’t been watching you fall for him every damn day?"
Savannah’s throat tightened. "Mallory, please—"
"No." Mallory’s voice cracked, the fight between them suddenly so much more than an argument. "You love him, Savannah. And don’t you dare try to lie to me."
Savannah’s chest caved.
Her vision blurred.
Because fuck.
She couldn’t lie.
Not to Mallory. Not when she had spent the last few weeks seeing everything Savannah refused to admit to herself.
Mallory’s breaths were uneven, her eyes pleading now, her voice shaking with the weight of what was slipping through her fingers. "You love him." She stepped closer, softer now, more broken than angry. "And you’re gonna leave him?"
Savannah swallowed hard, wrapping her arms around herself. "It’s not that simple."
Mallory let out a bitter laugh, shaking her head. "Actually, it is."
Savannah squeezed her eyes shut, hating how much this hurt.
Hating how much it was tearing her apart.
"He’s everything I ever wanted," she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. "And that’s exactly why I have to go."
Mallory blinked. Her expression twisted. "Do you hear yourself?"
Savannah did.
And it sounded awful.
But what if she stayed and it wasn’t enough? What if she stayed and he regretted it? What if she stayed and this thing between them burned out just as quickly as it ignited?
And worse—
What if she stayed, and he was everything she ever wanted, and she lost him anyway?
What if she couldn’t survive that?
Savannah turned back toward her suitcase, pressing her trembling fingers to the lid, trying to breathe through the ache clawing at her ribs, trying to force herself to move.
Mallory was watching her, her shoulders rising and falling as she struggled to keep her voice even, struggled to hold herself together. Then, finally—
She sighed, pressing the heels of her hands to her eyes.
She wasn’t mad anymore.
She was hurt.
She was watching her best friend ruin herself in real-time, and she was powerless to stop it.
Mallory inhaled deeply, letting the anger seep out of her before she softened. Before she tried again. Because this wasn’t just Savannah running.
It was Savannah terrified of letting herself have something real for once.
And if anyone knew her well enough to see through the bullshit, it was Mallory.
She sat back down on the bed, the mattress dipping under her weight. This time, there was no frustration, no venom in her voice. Just quiet understanding.
"Vannah—" she started, her voice gentle now. "You're leaving because you're scared. But have you stopped for even a second to think about what happens if you stay?"
Savannah pressed her lips together, arms tightening around herself.
Mallory nudged her knee, coaxing, pushing. "What if it does work out?" she asked, voice full of something desperate and hopeful. "What if he is everything you ever wanted? What if this isn’t just a summer thing, but the start of something you didn’t even realize you were missing?"
Savannah let out a shaky breath. "And what if it’s not?"
Mallory sighed. "Then at least you tried." She searched her face, her own eyes glistening now. "At least you gave it a chance instead of running before you even let yourself find out."
She leaned forward, voice soft, like she was trying to hold her together before she shattered completely. "I’ve never seen you like this before, Sav. I’ve never seen you look at someone the way you look at him. I’ve never seen him look at anyone the way he looks at you."
Savannah closed her eyes for a beat, her heart squeezing in her chest because she knew.
She knew.
Chase looked at her like she was it for him. Like she was the only thing that made sense in his world.
And she was about to walk away from that.
"Do you really think you’re going to go back to Asheville and pretend none of this happened?" Mallory’s voice pulled her back. "You think you’re going to go back to your old life and just be fine without him?"
Savannah turned away, blinking hard, trying to hold herself together.
Mallory exhaled, reaching out to grip her hands, forcing her to look at her. "Babe, love isn't safe. It’s messy, and terrifying, and it asks you to take risks. But it's also the best thing you'll ever have."
She squeezed her hands tighter, her voice breaking. "And you—you have a chance at it with Chase. A real one. And I don’t think you’re going to forgive yourself if you walk away."
Savannah swallowed past the lump in her throat, her entire body trembling because deep down, she knew Mallory was right.
She knew leaving was going to destroy her just as much as it was going to destroy Chase.
But she had spent so long convincing herself that love wasn’t something she could trust, that it was fleeting, conditional, breakable—
How was she supposed to suddenly believe that this time would be different?
That Chase was different?
Mallory squeezed her hands one last time, sensing the war raging inside her. "Stay, Savannah."
Her voice cracked with emotion. "Stay for him. Stay for yourself. Stay because maybe, just maybe, you’ve finally found the thing that makes this place home."
Savannah opened her mouth.
No words came.
Because she wanted to.
God, she wanted to.
But she didn’t know if she could.