PART TWO PREVIEW
Riley Harker is rarely so vulnerable.
Kade watches him carefully, reading every tiny reaction in the expressions of a man who is typically untouchable. They sit on Riley’s bed, crossed knees touching.
No windowsills in here, no windows at all.
They can’t be interrupted in here.
No one would dare.
Even so, Kade wishes they were elsewhere.
‘He wanted your body for himself,’ Riley tells him.
Before the words can even sink in, a swift and vicious surge of pinch-sharp pain seizes his organs, settling hardest around his heart. It cleanly kicks Kade’s breath from his lungs, leaves him briefly disoriented.
Riley squeezes Kade’s hands. ‘You OK?’
Swallowing as the pain fades to tolerable levels, Kade nods, returns the squeeze. ‘Yeah, I’m good.’
‘It’ll pass if you let it.’
The words feel weirdly familiar, but Kade can’t be sidetracked. He needs to know whatever Riley can tell him.
‘I’ve never known that kind of pain before. It didn’t come from outside,’ Kade tells him, frowning deeply, still breathless. ‘Felt like a fucking hand around my heart.’
‘That’s the curse.’
A swell of silent sympathy rises inside Kade, but he lets none of it show, knows Riley hates to be pitied in any way, shape or form.
‘It stops you from talking?’
‘About certain things.’
‘Why? Who did it?’
‘Kade,’ Riley says, gently forbidding.
‘No, I need to know. Please.’
‘I've spent the last seven years learning how to keep you from feeling it, how to contain it inside just me but that’s changing now. I don’t want to hurt you unnecessarily.’
‘I can take it.’
‘That’s not your decision.’
‘Why is it yours?’
‘Because I’m—’
A fresh wave of seizure grips Kade’s insides so hard he actually lets out a pained noise. His nervous system reels, warns him that whatever he’s doing to cause this has to stop. Riley endures it silently, pale and still. He barely reacts.
Kade exhales shakily, actual tears in his eyes.
‘How often do you feel this?’
‘The last few years, not much. But now that he’s back—’
‘Back?’ Kade shifts closer. ‘Riley, please. I know you know him. Tell me. Find a way, you have to. I can’t stand that you know so much I don’t.’
‘I’m trying. It’s easier to control when you’re not near.’
‘That doesn’t help.’
‘I know. Look, there’s no way I can tell you certain things, OK? But I can tell you some stuff, so let me.’
‘How do you know Lachlan?’
‘Kade, stop.’
‘Why doesn’t he know you? Did he forget? Did Jules—?’
The pain hits like a punch that time.
It lands hard and brutal right in the middle of his body, solar plexus curling in on itself like a dying star.
Riley keeps him upright. Kade tries to breathe but he’s winded, can’t quite get air inside his body.
Despite the anger Kade feels at being kept in the dark, he can’t help looking up at Riley, finding those clear blue eyes that always make him feel safe, whispering, ‘I’m so sorry you… you dealt with this alone.’
Riley shakes his head. ‘I wasn’t alone. We’re always connected.’ He looks down at his hands interlinked with Kade’s. His knuckles carry the bruises, the torn skin. It wasn’t Riley’s fight, but he wears the wounds anyway.
‘Fuck, Riley. I’ve been hurt so much the last seven years. You felt all of it?’
‘So did you.’
‘But it healed fast and I barely felt the pain after.’ Kade turns Riley’s hands over, thumb brushing over the damage. His own knuckles are barely even bruised anymore. ‘What happens if you get hurt?’
‘Then your body mirrors the injury, and you heal the worst of it. It’s why…’ Riley closes his eyes, vaguely distressed. ‘It’s one of the reasons I try to stay out of harm’s way, to keep you safe.’
Sensing difficult territory, Kade bites back his instinct to tell Riley they can leave this for another time, not to worry. It’s in his nature to do that, always has been. He doesn’t like seeing Riley struggle, never has.
‘I never thought for a second that you were a coward.’
Riley’s throat bobs. ‘I know that.’
‘Neither does anyone else.’
‘I don’t care what they think.’ His eyes open, control remastered. ‘I care what you think, which is why I’m going to try and share what I can now.’
‘Whatever you can tell me. Please.’
‘Most of it’ll sound fucking ridiculous.’ Riley seems strangely nervous now, almost skittish.
Kade settles himself. ‘Tell me.’
Riley takes a deep breath.