Chapter 20 #2
I covered my face with one hand while she chuckled beside me.
When I lowered it, her expression had softened.
“Listen to me, liking somebody ain’t the same as trusting them, and wanting them ain’t the same as them being good for you.
Sometimes the wrong man can make you feel right because he shows up when you’re lonely. ”
That struck close enough to home quiet me down and she noticed, “But,” she continued, “sometimes you call a man wrong because you scared of what happens if he turns out to be right.”
I looked at her. “Really?”
She shrugged one shoulder. “You asked.”
“How do I know the difference?”
“You don’t, not right away. That’s why God gave you time and common sense so use both. Don’t give neither one away because a man got pretty teeth and broad shoulders.”
A laughed. “Who said he had broad shoulders?”
“You did when you didn’t say he didn’t.”
Before I could respond, the front door opened without a knock. “Lulu!”
Lulu’s eyes rolled toward the ceiling. “Every damn body got a key to my house except me.”
Monica appeared in the kitchen a few seconds later wearing a fitted cream suit, heels, and that aura that made people straighten their posture when she entered a room.
Her hair those smooth deep waves that fell right past her shoulders, and not a strand out of place despite the South Florida humidity.
She looked like she belonged behind a desk overlooking the city, approving loans large enough to change families for generations, which was exactly where she usually was.
Monica had worked her way from a teller position straight out of college to becoming one of the top banking executives in Miami. She knew everybody, remembered everything, and had a way of asking questions that made you feel like she already had the answers.
She dropped her keys into the ceramic dish near the door and immediately eyed my bowl. “You made souse and didn’t call me Lulu?”
Lulu scoffed. “You don’t answer your phone unless somebody calling about money.”
“I answer.”
“You send that little automatic text saying, ‘Can I call you later?’ Then later comes next Thursday.”
Monica leaned down and kissed her cheek. “I’m here now.”
“Yeah child, for my food.”
“Noooo, for your company. How is it for your food when you didn’t even tell me you cooked.” Monica smiled before turning toward me. “What are you doing here in the middle of the day cousin?”
I smiled and gave her a hug. “Girl, just being stuffed with chicken souse and telling Lulu about life.”
She nodded. “I can see that.”
“She filed for divorce,” Lulu announced.
“Grandma!” I scolded.
“What? You want me to put it in the church bulletin first?”
Monica’s playful expression disappeared. She set her purse down and pulled me into another hug before I could object. The scent of her perfume filled my nostrils as she held on for several seconds. “You okay?”
“I will be.” I wiped my red eyes.
She drew back, keeping both hands on my shoulders while she searched my face. “Does Rome know?”
“He’ll get served soon.”
“Good, because that man has been calling people trying to figure out why you won’t do what you’ve done in the past and forgive him.”
“Who has he called?”
“Hell, he’s called me twice.”
I shook my head in pure disgust. “What did you tell him?”
She frowned like she smelled some shit. “That I manage portfolios, not grown ass women.”
Lulu slapped the counter and laughed so hard she had to hold her side causing Monica to laugh too, pleased with herself, then she reached for the saucepan. “Is there enough left for me?”
“There was before you walked in.”
Monica ignored her and began fixing a bowl.
The three of us stayed in the kitchen for another half hour, talking over one another the way family did when nobody felt the need to wait for their turn.
Monica complained about a client who wanted a multimillion-dollar loan without providing proper paperwork and Lulu said banks had become too nosy and asked why people needed to prove they had money before somebody would lend them more.
Monica attempted to explain risk assessment, but Lulu told her Jesus fed five thousand people without checking anybody’s credit.
I laughed until my damn stomach hurt. For a little while, I forgot about how complicated my life had become. Then Grandma Lulu opened a cabinet and cursed.
“What now?” Monica asked.
“I’m out of cornstarch.”
“You don’t need cornstarch for souse.”
“I’m making guava duff later on, mind your business.”
I slid off the stool and reached for my purse. “I’ll go get it.”
Lulu pointed the wooden spoon at me. “Get the yellow box, don’t bring me that store-brand foolishness. It don’t thicken right.”
“It’s all starch Lulu.” I said.
“It ain’t all mine.”
With that, I left. The corner store was less than five minutes away, between a laundromat and a small beauty supply store where the mannequin heads in the window had been wearing the same wigs since I was in high school.
The parking lot was crowded despite the time of day, with cars angled wherever their drivers found space and two dudes standing near the entrance scratching lottery tickets against the wall.
I parked near the side and hurried inside grateful I had changed into denim shorts and a loose T-shirt before visiting Lulu.
The air conditioner blasted hard enough to give me goosebumps across my arms as I walked past the shelves packed with canned goods, cleaning supplies, and every snack invented since 1985.
I found the cornstarch near the flour, checked twice to make sure it was the yellow box, then headed toward the register.
That was when I saw Marv’s ass standing by the drink coolers wearing gray sweats and a plain white T-shirt, with one hand wrapped around a bottle of water.
He was still fine, there was no denying that, but something about him looked off.
His beard was trimmed, his clothes were clean, and the gold Cuban chain around his neck still stole the show, yet exhaustion sat heavily around his eyes.
He looked like he had not slept in days.
His gaze landed on me, and some of the strain disappeared through a smile. “Well, look who decided to come outside.”
I stopped beside the register. “Hey, Marv.”
“Damn, that’s all I get?”
He placed the bottle on the counter and crossed toward me before I could decide how much distance to keep between us.
His arm slid around my waist, pulling me against his chest with the easy familiarity he had always used.
Normally, I would have relaxed into it. This time, my body got stiff before I could hide it.
Lev’s face flashed through my mind, and guilt followed so quickly it irritated me. Marv and I weren’t together. We had never promised each other anything. Still, after what happened at the waterfront property, letting Marv hold me felt dishonest in a way it had not twenty-four hours earlier.
He looked down at me. “What, you acting scary now?”
“I’m not.” I gave him a small smile and stepped back, pretending I needed to adjust the cornstarch in my hand. “I’ve just been tired.”
“So tired you forgot about me?”
“I didn’t forget Marv, how can I forget you?”
He slowly licked his lips and smiled, “You still owe me that date.”
“I know.” I kept my voice gentle, studying his eyes. “I’ve been working a lot, but I got you.”
He didn’t look like he believed me one bit. “That’s what you keep saying.”
“Marv, you sure you okay?” I questioned wondering why his mouth kept moving like that.
He glanced toward the windows. “I’m straight.”
“You don’t look like you slept.”
“Man, I sleep nurse. Don’t start evaluating me.” he teased.
“When do you sleep?” I asked anyway.
“When I get around to it.”
The answer sounded too close to one I would have given Lulu, but before I could press him, Marv leaned down and placed a kiss on my cheek. “I’ma hold you to that date,” he muttered. Then he grabbed his water from the counter, paid for it, along with my corn starch and walked outside.
I stood there for a second, trying to figure out what I had just felt.
I was definitely concern, or maybe even guilt but at this point, confusion had become too familiar to bother naming anymore.
I stepped outside and saw Marv crossing the lot toward his Mercedes parked near the laundromat.
A woman sat in the passenger seat with one arm resting along the open window, with her long nails tapping against the door while she watched him approach.
I slowed down and saw Marv open the driver’s door, said something to her that made her laugh, then slid behind the wheel without looking back toward the store. I stared at the car until it pulled away.
“So you rushing me about a date while riding around with company.” I laughed underneath my breath as I walked toward my own car.
Marv was a funny character, but he wasn’t funny enough for me to be angry, especially since we were both free to do whatever we wanted, but funny enough for me to remember the next time he acted like my work schedule was keeping him home alone staring at the walls.
I dropped the cornstarch off at Lulu’s, let her make me a to go bowl of souse, and headed home before she could find a second errand. Hell, Monica would have to do it next.
The complex was quiet outside when I entered.
Once I got inside, I locked up, changed into some cotton shorts and an old tank top, then headed into the kitchen to finish a set of orders due the following morning.
By the time the first cake layers went into the oven, I was tired but at least the kitchen was clean because I was always taught to clean as you go.
I had a binder with more money in it from the night before and I needed to give it to Lev.
What happened between Lev and me didn’t erase what I owed him.
I didn’t want the debt becoming something blurred or unspoken because we had crossed a line.
The money still needed to be paid, every dollar of it, and I needed him to know I understood that.