22. Chapter 22
Chapter 22
Rebecca
A fter a fitful night of sleep, I’m dragging today. All night, I tossed and turned, thinking about Eli and wondering what happens now. And in some weird way, I missed him. Over the course of the weekend, I grew accustomed to his warmth and weight next to me. It was lonely without that. Or maybe it just had more to do with the worry that I’d never feel that again.
I allot myself a little extra time to grab a coffee from the campus center. It’s not great, and definitely not as good as I could make myself at Three Sticks, but it will serve its purpose.
The only problem is that I give myself a little too much time and end up being an extra ten minutes early for class. Normally, this wouldn’t pose a problem, and I’d just wait outside the lecture hall or take a seat if the doors were open. But I’m not ready to run into Eli just yet. I have no idea what to do or say.
While I’ll be a jittery mess wondering what’s going on, I don’t think I could talk to him first and then sit through class. Especially if it were to not go my way.
Instead, I linger outside the building, holding my cup close as a late fall breeze nips at my cheeks and cuts through my jacket. When I start recognizing other students from my class, I make my way into the building, relishing the warmth as it pours over me.
Chewing my lip, I decide to find a new spot, more in the middle rows than way in the back. I’ll know better next time if it’s a bad decision.
Eli starts his walk down the amphitheater steps and my breath halts, pulse skyrocketing. As he settles behind the podium, it’s almost as if he can hear my pounding heart, his gaze lifting and settling right on me. A small smile graces his face.
It’s all I get before he jumps into the lecture. Today, I find him twice as captivating. He seems more animated, more excited about what he’s teaching. I can’t tell if it’s an actual change in his demeanor or just my perception.
Regardless, class flies by, and I’m startled as everyone around me starts to pack up.
“Don’t forget to grab your papers on your way out! They’re separated as always, alphabetically by last name.”
This is the perfect opportunity for me to stay and chat. I can hang back and pretend I have a question, or maybe that I didn’t do well and want to discuss my grade with him.
It all seems to be going in my favor, until Kelly steps in front of him with a wide smile. He glances in my direction briefly, his eyes giving away everything I feel.
I grit my teeth and find my paper, giving a quick nod as I leave the room. The only reason I even know Kelly’s name is because she’s constantly raising her hand in class. And it’s not because she knows everything. She wants Eli’s attention, in any way she can get it. Whether that means wearing low-cut shirts and tight jeans, or trying to answer every single question just so his attention is drawn to her.
With a heavy sigh, I flip through my paper, tracking the notes and comments. I know he grades them blind based on how we hand them in and, even if he didn’t, he’s not the type to show favoritism. He’d grade my paper just as harshly as anybody else’s.
When I get to the third page, something immediately catches my eye. There’s a small sticky note in the center of the page. A wide smile spans my face, so big that my cheeks hurt but I can’t tamp it down.
On the note is his chicken-scratch handwriting, with his phone number and an apology that he should have given it to me sooner.
My chest swells and the urge to go back into the classroom is strong. But I hold back and head out of the building instead. This time, the cool air is welcome as it licks against my burning skin.
The smile is still on my face when I get back to the dorm. I fall against my door as it shuts and hold the paper to my chest.
“Good class?” Tasha’s voice startles me and my face burns.
“Just did well on a paper I thought I was going to bomb.” I push away from the door and deposit my bag under my desk, the paper going right on top of my laptop.
“You? I didn’t even think that was a word in your vocabulary. At least in regard to school.”
I roll my eyes. While I’m a solid student, I certainly know the sting of failure. Just not as much as Tash does. As much as she noticed my improved mood and nonexistence from the weekend, I can’t tell her more than the fact that there’s a guy involved. If only just because I don’t exactly know what is going on.
With quick movements, I pull my phone from my bag, my fingers hovering above the screen as I start to enter a new number. What do I put him in as? Eli? Professor Baker? Some other made-up name I have yet to determine?
I’m clearly overthinking, so I quickly punch in Eli and slyly look at the sticky note as I input his number. Then I take a deep breath before typing out a message.
Bex: Hey. Figured you wanted me to reach out since you gave me your number…
Eli: I wanted to give you the option to. Yes.
The message comes back immediately and my chest flutters. But now what do I say? I’m not usually this nervous about conversing with boys. Though maybe that’s the problem. Every other guy I’ve been with was a boy and Eli is a man.
He saves me the trouble, though, my phone pinging in my hand.
Eli: When can I see you again?
Eli: Outside of class that is.
I like that he made the distinction. But unfortunately, I have some bad news for both of us.
Bex: Probably not until Wednesday. I have more classes today and both class and work tomorrow.
Eli: Still don’t want to let me get you out of that?
Bex: No. Not yet at least. Let me hold on to that card if that’s okay with you.
Eli: Of course. You just say the word.
My fingers hover, as I don’t know what else to say. But my phone doesn’t ping, so apparently neither does he. Not quite sure what else to do, I set the phone down on my desk. There’s a relief flowing through me, knowing that I have a way to contact him, that he wants more.
Another ping has me grabbing my phone so quickly I nearly drop it.
Eli: Wednesday feels really far away.
I pull the phone to my chest as my eyes flutter shut.
Bex: Yeah. It does.
Eli: Keep in touch, Bex. Feel free to use this number any time, day or night.
Bex: That goes both ways.
When no message comes through, I set the phone down again, watching it and waiting for it to ping again. But after twenty minutes, it doesn’t, and I know the conversation is done for now.
“So, you talking to a guy?”
I whirl around at Tasha’s voice. The conversation consumed me so much I forgot she was even here.
“Yeah, something like that. How can you tell?”
“Well, for one, you’re usually kinda hard to get a hold of unless you’re expecting a contact. Two, I’ve never seen you not only jump to answer a message so quickly, but type that fast. I swear I watch those dots pop up and disappear at least a hundred times before you send me a message.” She huffs and shakes her head.
I’d be a little embarrassed if she wasn’t spot on. There’re a lot of people my age glued to their phones, but I’m not often one of them. Actually, most of the time, I have no idea where my phone even is. I make sure to have it any time I leave the building and especially if I drive home or out to Juniper Grove but, otherwise, it could be buried under a pile of papers on my desk or lost in the sheets on my bed.
“So, do I get to meet this guy?”
My eyes widen as I clear my throat. “Um, our schedules are kind of different, especially with work and all that. It’s hard for us to find time together as it is. But hopefully someday.”
“When do you see him then?”
I scratch at the back of my head while my eyebrows bunch together like I’m trying to puzzle something out. “Uh, mostly in class.”
“You should dress like a little sex symbol and show up to the next one. I bet he’ll make time to see you then.” She raises her eyebrows and cants her head in my direction.
As much as I don’t like to draw attention to myself, she has a point. It’s not so much that Eli doesn’t make time for me. I wasn’t lying when I said our schedules are bad. But dressing a little sexy never hurt anyone. Right?