Episode 24
Awkward Moments
Cerian blinks, and his entire family is gone.
At least he doesn’t have an audience as he stands uncertainly in the open doorway to his chamber, watching Arisanna while the blankets covering her gently rise and fall with her steady breathing.
What now? Is he supposed to sleep beside her?
They slept beside each other last night.
That felt different, though. There was no bed involved, for one. And she wasn’t exhausted into delirium. Will she even remember her words when she wakes? Begging him not to leave her?
As if he could abandon her. It’s like threads have wrapped around their hearts, binding them together.
A heartbinding. Aptly named.
Well, he’s not going to sleep in the corridor.
Quietly, he steps into his chamber and closes the door behind him. The lantern light someone left flickers on Arisanna’s rounded ear, and Cerian studies it. What does a human ear feel like?
Not just a human ear, though. Her ear. Arisanna’s. Did he really meet her two days ago? Surely it’s been longer than that.
He gazes longingly at the bed beside her. He’s not exhausted to incoherency the way she was, but he is tired. It’s been a long day.
With a sigh, he collects an extra blanket and pillow and plants himself in the upholstered chair facing the bed, where he watches his human princess until his own eyelids droop in sleep.
Why is the bed moving?
Arisanna blinks her eyes open in confusion as she looks around...a train? Didn’t they arrive in Darlei?
In the seat facing her is Cerian, and the inexplicable relief that fills her when she sees him makes her cheeks warm.
“The heartlanding.” He takes everything in before meeting her gaze.
Of course. Their heartlanding. That should have occurred to her. Especially since she’s wearing that...dress again. At least her cloak drapes across her lap and covers her legs at the moment.
The silence between them grows, and neither of them rushes to fill it. Vague memories of him carrying her filter through her thoughts, but surely that didn’t happen...did it?
She barely remembers anything after arriving at Windhaven. All she wanted was sleep. Where did she even lie down? In a bed of moss?
She must be misremembering that, too.
Well. This is awkward. Are they going to sit here and stare at each other all night?
“I like your hair.” As soon as the words tumble from Cerian’s lips, he looks horrified.
Did he mean to say that?
She fingers her hair where it hangs loose aside from the ribbons woven between the strands, holding her thick tresses away from her face. It’s a little shorter here than in real life. “Thank you.”
He quickly looks away, turning toward the dark window as if he can make out something in the inky blackness, but all Arisanna sees are their reflections.
“I think we’re slowing down,” he says.
Great. He probably wants to visit that moonlit forest again. After their never-ending ride to Darlei through the Wildthorne Woods, she wouldn’t mind a break from more of the same.
He’s right about the train slowing. The high pitch of brakes as metal rubs against metal assaults her ears, and he flinches.
At least she didn’t fall into his arms this time. That’s a good thing. Right?
The hazy memory of him carrying her fills her mind again. His solid chest at her side. Her head as she rested it against his shoulder and neck.
Did that actually happen? She could ask him, but what an awkward conversation that would be.
He rises to his feet, and she stares up at him.
“Are you coming?” he asks.
“We don’t really have to get off, do we?”
“Are you still tired?”
Stars above. What sort of exhausted fool did she play for his family before falling asleep who knows where last night?
She doesn’t feel tired now, though. At least, not enough to use that as an excuse to stay on the train, where it’s light and safe and dangers don’t lurk in the shadows.
She looks up at him, unsure what to say, and that brow of his furrows once again.
“Tell me,” he says.
He probably didn’t mean to sound as brusque as he did.
“Please,” he adds more softly.
“The woods unnerve me,” she murmurs, not meeting his eyes.
“I see.” He lowers himself to his seat again, and she tentatively looks at him.
She must seem pathetic to him. He loves the woods. Of course he does—he’s a plant wielder. She’s probably safer by his side in the woods than she is anywhere else.
That realization hits her hard. He would protect her, wouldn’t he? She can trust him to keep her safe.
“May I hold your hand?” she asks softly before realizing how utterly ridiculous she sounds. As if she’s a young child and not a grown woman. Somehow, the idea of holding on to him makes the prospect of the dark forest less frightening, though.
His brows go up this time. “Right now?”
Stars above. Her cheeks must be flaming. She should have chosen her words more carefully.
Before she can clarify, he moves to the bench beside her and extends his hand. She stares at it and then meets his eyes.
What is she supposed to say now? She can’t refuse him. But just sitting here holding hands sounds even more awkward than anything else they’ve done.
Except maybe when he helped her out of her wedding gown.
Unsure what else to do, she places her palm against his and threads her fingers between his own. His hand is warm, as it’s been every time she’s touched it.
As their eyes connect, something inside her flutters. Is her heart racing? Or is the pounding in her chest coming from him?
She swallows, trying to wet her suddenly dry throat. “If I follow you off the train, will you promise not to let go?”
His hand tightens around hers. “I told you I wouldn’t let any harm befall you, Arisanna. I won’t let go.” As he looks into her eyes, there’s something there she can’t define. Something fierce and protective. Almost...possessive.
It makes her heart pound until the sensation is deafening, her blood thrumming loudly through her ears. He must feel it, too. He says nothing, though.
“If you wish to hang on my arm as well, I won’t stop you.” A glint appears in his emerald eyes, and his mouth quirks.
Is he...teasing her?
Who is this elf she married? Beneath the aloof exterior and the glares and the brusque words?
No need to embarrass herself further, though. She has no intention of launching herself at him every time an owl hoots tonight.
“Your hand will suffice.”
Not letting go of her, he stands, and she follows as she clings to her cloak.
“Do you wish to put that on?” he asks.
When she nods, he takes it from her and somehow manages to set it across her shoulders without dropping her hand.
And he only glances down once.
Is he blushing? What an awkward place this is. As if marrying a stranger wasn’t awkward enough. The heartlanding could at least provide more practical clothing while they’re becoming acquainted with each other.
And save the risqué leathers that barely cover her for later? What kind of thought is that?
“Shall we?” he asks.
“Shall we what?”
Those expressive brows of his wrinkle once more. “Get off the train?”
“Right. Of course.”
He must think her addled. What sort of empty-headed princess does he imagine he got stuck with?
True to his word, though, he doesn’t let go of her, and as he leads her down the steps into the dark forest, she does her best not to crush his hand. He’s kind enough not to say anything about her death-grip.
“It’s different this time.” He lights one of those balls of yellow light in his free hand as he gazes at the trees around them.
It looks the same to her, but she keeps that thought to herself. “Why does the heartlanding keep dropping us off in the woods?”
“Perhaps so you can learn to trust me.” He says it so matter-of-factly that she looks at him in surprise.
“You think I don’t trust you?”
He shrugs. “We did just meet. You have little reason to trust me.”
He’s right, of course. Though her father has always spoken of King Lorial with respect, Arisanna didn’t even know Cerian existed until they met in Feressa mere days ago.
He steps forward into the shadows, bringing his light with him, and she follows at his side until the trees part to reveal another moonlit lake remarkably similar to the one they saw before.
He stops and studies the rippling water. The trees nearby. Even the night sky dotted with stars. “It is the same forest. We just got off the train on the other side of the lake this time.”
It’s an odd place, this heartlanding of theirs, with trains that randomly drop them off in the forest by this lake.
It is beautiful, if a tad eerie.
The sound of a creature crashing through the woods to their left startles Arisanna, and she clutches at Cerian’s arm before she can stop herself. When a stag emerges at the lake’s edge, her embarrassment grows.
“It was close, but I believe we’ll be all right,” Cerian whispers.
Stars above. He’s teasing her again. And she’s still clutching his bare arm.
“Come on.” He drags her away from the stag along the opposite shore of the lake.
“Where are we going?”
“Wherever we want to go. I’ve explored every inch of the woods near Darlei.”
He has the same expression on his face as when she offered to show him the astronomy tower. He looks happy here in the forest in a way he hasn’t looked anywhere else.
If only it weren’t so dark.
In an instant, the moonlit woods slip into dawn as the faintest rays of sunlight cross the early morning sky.
Beside her, Cerian slows his steps as he looks up in confusion. “What just happened?”
Shocked, she follows his gaze, still clinging to his arm. She opens and closes her mouth several times before words finally form on her lips. “I think I called forth the sun.”