Chapter Nineteen
Ishoveled in food as quickly as I could, not caring if I looked ladylike. Normally, I was quite a refined elf—having had a mother who was quite refined herself—but there was a new fire under me, pushing me to get Aleixo home and out of my hair. Or rather, my thoughts.
The sooner he left, the better, because he was either destined to be killed here or would spend the rest of his days running from the Realm Guard in his own realm.
“What’s the point of taking me back if the Realm Guard will find me no matter where I am?”
How had he known what I was thinking? Was my face now flushed? Was I that easy to read? “I admit, I’m not sure. All I know is we must return you so the binding breaks. I don’t believe anyone can remain bound over the distance of the realms.”
“So, in other words, I could die either way, but you’ll be free of me?” If anyone else had uttered the words, it would have sounded bitter or upset, but he just said everything so casually, like nothing phased him. Meanwhile, I was wound tighter than a weeping willow in a twister.
“If you want to put it that way…”
“What’s the point, then? I know you don’t wish to marry the Realm Guard, but what difference does it make having me with you?”
Ah, he was digging for answers I didn’t feel comfortable even acknowledging myself. “Does it matter?”
“Why did you bring me with you, Calista?”
There were the words. It felt like he was making me confront things at every turn, but I was so overwhelmed, so cautious, that I couldn’t even think through the things he wanted me to say out loud.
“We need to be moving soon.”
“These are all valid questions. You knew I was a dead man either way, you knew the Realm Guard would catch up to us, and you knew we were stuck no matter where we went. Why are we running, and why did you take me with you?”
“I don’t know!” They were the first words out of my mouth, but they were also the biggest thing at the forefront of my mind.
I didn’t know the answer to these questions.
Right as we spoke, death was hunting us down in different ways.
Death of the body would take Aleixo, and death of the soul would take me.
Standing abruptly, I took a step away before turning back.
“It isn’t that I don’t know exactly…” I hesitated.
“I just can’t think about these things in the same way you can.
I know what’s coming, I know what we’re facing.
I know everything has a timepiece ticking on it, but for once, I want to make the time stretch longer; I want to feel like it’s in my control.
For once, I want to feel like I’m in charge of everything around me. ”
I paused and looked up at him, trying to hide the tears that threatened.
“When we reach the end, when he reaches us, it is all over. Every delightful part of my life ends. The brewery, the magic of Coven Haven, the daily life I enjoy living…and you. It all ends. So please, do not ask again. Just let me suspend time for as long as I can.”
Without another word, I left.