Chapter 4 | Spirit | February 17
For the past month, the renovations were moving slower than we wanted. I was anxious to get back to work. Catering jobs helped, but it didn’t feel the same as cooking for the customers who loved my restaurant. The more the contractor worked on another area, the more he found a new problem that cost money and added an extension to the time to complete. Yesterday, he said I needed a new roof because he found termites.
I wanted the restaurant to be fully renovated by the end of March so that we had most of April to re-orient staff to the new area and train new staff. I stayed away from the restaurant as much as possible whenever Jace was supposed to be there. We would chat briefly by phone or in passing as either he or I was leaving. Any conversation longer than that inevitably led to a disagreement. He was particular in his vision, which often countered mine. I wanted wooden tables. He wanted tables with different abstract patterns. We finally compromised to have both and will decide on the best way to place them once the tables were delivered. I won the battle of having dark purple leather on the bar seats when he wanted a drab brown when I pointed out that the purple would bring out the hints of purple from the abstract backsplash behind the bar.
I argued hotly about the addition of a coffee bar. We had a regular bar and served coffee and hot cocoa. That was more than enough. He insisted that serving a variety of coffees, especially with cannabis or CBD, would attract people on the way to work since people walk past the restaurant every day. He won that argument when the staff cheered once he introduced the idea since most of my staff were Starbuck enthusiasts anyway.
As a chef, I’d been at home trying new recipes and adding a dab of Delta-9 THC from vials that Jace brought me one day from a recent trip to Vegas. We had to be careful to follow the state regulations since marijuana wasn’t legal here. Cannabis had been considered a controlled substance and an arrestable offense until 2019 for all marijuana. Now, as long as we remained under a certain low dose of THC, we could use it. Today, since the kitchen at the café was completed yesterday, I planned to experiment in the restaurant kitchen and get someone to sample it besides my neighbor, John, who loved being my test taker.
I lifted my bag higher on my shoulder and fumbled with my keys to open my door, and a warm hand covered mine. I looked up at Jace’s handsome face, which was too close to mine. “I thought you were going out of town?”
“I know. Figured you were avoiding me, so I lied.” He grinned and held the door open so I could pass him. “I wanted to be here when you saw your kitchen for the first time without dust and men with saggy jeans.”
“Well, I guess you can be here and test some of the food. I’m not sure my neighbor is the best judge. He likes everything I cook.”
I felt his heated gaze on my ass as he followed me. I wish I could say knowing that he was attracted bothered me. I avoided him because I didn’t want to fall for him. That impulsive kiss in the elevator almost ruined me for another man, so I kept my distance. I managed to keep everything professional even though he continued to flirt and openly admire my body.
I’d been embarrassed about my unrequited love for Jace. I didn’t want to be that foolish girl again, especially now when the stakes were higher. He was a partner in my business, which was already a recipe for disaster. I also knew my heart enough that if I let him fuck me the way he wanted, I would so fall for him. Red flags wouldn’t matter once I opened my legs for him. The best thing was to keep our contact minimal.
“I’m sure he likes everything you do,” He scoffed, though the jealousy in his voice made me smile.
I covered my mouth at the transformation when I pushed through the silver door. I slowly walked in, admiring the three new fryers and two double industrial-sized ovens. The silver island now had a sink in addition to the large sink on the wall. The walls were painted yellow to bring sun and energy instead of the dull beige color it’d once been. The pantry had been expanded, so there was more room to store food and cannabis supplies. “It is insane that all this was happening under my nose.”
“I know. At least they got this right.” He stood directly behind me, and I turned and hugged him before I could stop myself.
His strong arms immediately held me tight, and my nipples pebbled against his sweater. Desire settled in my pussy, and I needed to escape him now. I tapped his chest hard to release me, and he shook his head. “Not this time. Told myself I’m not letting you run off once I held you in my arms again.”
My hands lay flat on his chest to keep some distance. I forced myself to look up at him and prayed I wouldn’t be mesmerized by his dark eyes and long lashes. “You are not a good idea.”
“Why?” He tilted his head and bit the corner of his lips. Damn it. I grew wetter.
I sighed, “Okay, what do you want from me?”
“For you to love me like you did once.”
“So arrogant. It was an infatuation. I didn’t know you.”
“You knew me. You were the only one who knew me and still loved me.” He lowered his head. “I was too much of a coward back then.”
I stared at his lips. “Are you still a coward now?”
“Try me and see.” Before his lips met mine, I moved my head, and his kiss landed right under my ear, which might have been more erogenous than my lips.
“I can’t afford to fall for you, Jace,” I lamented.
“What do you have to lose?”
“Everything,” I said plainly and blinked back unexpected tears. “You don’t know and probably will never know what it means to be devastated by someone you believed cared about you. I knew you didn’t feel as deep as I did.”
He snapped, “Stop putting words in my mouth or think you knew how I felt back then. I just told you I was a motherfucking coward. I didn’t know what to do with a girl much smarter than me who would give me the world. Shit, I could tell if I asked, you would’ve married me right out of high school.”
My face flamed at the truth of his words, and I shoved against him this time. “Let me go, Jace. I don’t want this. I don’t want you.”
His arms only tightened around me, and he bent his head to capture my frustrated gaze. “You do want me. You want me to push down those jeans over that ass, bend you over, and fuck you senseless.”
Oh...the intensity with which he stared at me, so ready to make my fantasies become real in a matter of seconds. All I needed to do was to turn around, and I could finally feel his dick deep inside of me. Would know intimately how he stroked and thrust. How his thickness would completely fill me. I slowly lifted my hand and traced his lips with my index finger. “Let me cook for you so you can taste test.”
His forehead dipped though he sucked on my finger.
“If we fuck, it’s on my terms and not yours.”
He licked my finger before he answered, “And what are those terms?”
I had no idea. I just knew I couldn’t succumb this quick. “What would be the fun in this if I told you?”
Jace’s hands curved to my ass. “Listen, if this is what you think, you have to be a challenge for me to be interested, you don’t. I promise you, fucking is just the start of us.”
“Stop getting me hot and let me cook, so you can tell me if it’s good once I add the THC?”
He kissed my neck. “If you say it’s good, then it’s good.”
“I can’t try those dishes.” I shrugged.
He dropped his arms. “It’s not a lot of cannabis to do much to you except relax. And trust me, you need to fucking relax.”
I pointed at his mouth. “And that is why fucking you is a bad idea.”
Undaunted, Jace asked, “How can you be the chef of Embers by Kimble and won’t even try the food? That makes no fucking sense, Snookie.”
“Is it that hard to call me by my name?”
He quirked an annoyed brow. “Whatever. Have you ever cooked a new dish and didn’t try it?”
“Well, no.”
“Then don’t be so stubborn that you won’t give marijuana a chance.”
“It’s marijuana, and I don’t use marijuana. Why can’t you understand that? I’m not judging you if that’s what you do.”
He asked skeptically, “Are you sure? Because it sounds like it. I would understand it if you didn’t drink, but I watched you taste several wines and cocktails for the bar. Your favorite is Cabernet Sauvignon. Marijuana is safer than alcohol.”
I was impressed that he paid that much attention, though I didn’t acknowledge it. “Alcohol is legal.”
Jace crossed his arms, and I had to train my gaze on his face, not his bulging biceps that his black sweater hugged perfectly. “Is that the issue? Because alcohol used to be illegal and in plenty of states, marijuana is legal.”
“Not here.”
“And slavery and segregation used to be legal.”
I chortled. “Are you seriously comparing our freedom to the legalization of marijuana?”
He slapped his palm with the back of his other hand. “The point I’m making is that you’re only judging marijuana and people who use it because it’s not sanctioned by the government. It’s the only reason.”
“Maybe I don’t like the way it smells.”
“If you vape it, you won’t smell it. Give me another reason.”
Instead of answering him, I walked to the pantry and pulled out elbow macaroni. “Mac and cheese?”
Jace stopped frowning. “Like the cheese on top is crusted and brown?”
I arched a brow. “If you stop yapping, you can help me. For now, can we table the discussion?”
To my relief, he nodded. “I may not be a world-class chef studying in France in high school like you, but I can dabble.” He went to the sink and washed his hands.
“You remembered when I went to Paris? That was the summer before you went to college.” The summer, I ran from home to get away from the disappointment and embarrassment of the prom and the fact that he was leaving for good. By the time I returned, he’d already left for Howard early for training.
“Missed you every day. You were gone until it was time for me to leave. Never said goodbye to each other.”
Although my heart smiled at his admission, I didn’t want to travel to the past. We had different memories. I could acknowledge that though he liked to tease me, he and Remi were protective over me. I could admit that he openly waited for me after school when he could to walk me home. On those rare walks when we were alone because our siblings were otherwise occupied, he would loop his arm around my neck and pull me close, kissing my temple or my cheek. It was just him and me for twenty-four minutes, laughing and talking about anything. He might have felt something for me, but his feelings were definitely not the same. He always had some girl waiting in the wings and wearing his jacket. And I was content just for a conversation with him or a smile.
Pitiful when I think back to the wistful girl who believed that the good girl got the boy. If I waited long enough, he would truly see me, and no one would love him more. Years and life have taught me that the aggressive bad girls caught the attention and kept the boy. Being a good and honest woman who loved cooking and looked forward to the day she could cook for her man and children, it didn’t seem to matter to men these days. The man in the refrigerator, grabbing different cheeses and butter, may want me now, but some glamorous, aggressive woman would catch his attention sooner or later. I had to find some way to keep my guard up even if we had sex. Because he wouldn’t stop until he got me, and I wasn’t sure I had a problem with that anymore.
We soon had the pasta boiling and grated cheese side by side while the speakers played music. I had sharp cheddar, and he had smoked gouda and medium cheddar. He sang horribly to the songs that played, especially when he sang Never Should Have Let You Go by Hi-Five to me.
I laughed as I wiped my hands. “I am so glad you’re not perfect in everything because that voice is horrible.”
“I’m not good in a lot of things, especially relationships. Two failed marriages under my belt.”
“At least you’ve been married. No one has loved me enough to be a wife.” I said, being careful not to sound sad or lonely. Being single and childless no longer bothered me. I liked the freedom to spend hours at the bookstore or Williams Sonoma or take a trip on a whim without consulting anyone. A couple of friends, my sister, and cousins with children became my children.
“Is there someone you loved enough to be your husband...besides me, of course.” He teased, and I elbowed him on his side.
“No. I’ve had a lot of Mr. Right Now, so I’m keeping my distance from you, Mr. I’m Not Good in Relationships.”
“I want to do better. My parents are still married and can’t understand why their three sons haven’t gotten it together yet.”
“You want to get married again?” I asked as if his answer didn’t matter. I heard of his marriages through my parents, who still remained in contact with his parents. They moved away shortly after I started college because Jace bought them a new home. I remember being jealous when he first got married to a girl he met in college and had a baby. When he was married the second time, I only felt a tinge of envy. I’d heard through the grapevine that he couldn’t remain faithful and who wants a cheating husband?
He smiled at me. “This time, it will be to a good woman who loves me for me.”
“Don’t do that.” I admonished while picking up the pot and dumping it in the strainer resting in the sink next to the stove. “Don’t flirt with me like you want something serious.”
“I just told you I want to be married again.”
“And why did the last two end?” I dumped the noodles back into the pot. “Probably because you can’t keep your dick in your pants. You never could even back in high school.”
To his credit, Jace chuckled. “I don’t know whether to be insulted or turned on. I can admit I’ve been a ho during my marriages, though I’m not totally at fault. I married the wrong women who wanted my name and money, and they got both in the end.”
I probably should’ve hit next on my phone because Darling Nikki by Prince started playing. I tried to ignore the seductive song as I put the pot back on the stove and took a chunk of parmesan cheese. Apparently, the song affected him too. He eased behind me, guided my hand to slice the cheese, and whispered near my ear. “I know you’re a chef, but I think you can slice the cheese easier if you handle the knife like this.”
Jace wanted an excuse to be near me, to touch me. I closed my eyes and allowed him to use my hand to slice the cheese. My head fell back on his chest. He released my hand, and the knife clattered on the silver island. His hands cupped my breasts while my arms hung limp at my side. He rubbed my nipples over and over again until I moaned. Then one hand dipped even further and slid inside my leggings to feel my slick pussy. He begged, “Come back to my place. I don’t want to fuck you here. At least not for the first time.”
“Not yet.” I gripped his arms, though he only rubbed and pulled harder, urging my body to release.
“Then when? We want each other. Let’s fuck and worry about everything else later.” He turned my chin to slip his tongue in my mouth. We both groaned and kissed. I undulated my hips as his two fingers toyed with my inner lips and clit. His dick pressed into my ass. Only material separated our bodies from the ultimate pleasure. When he pushed my leggings down, I continued to kiss him and only held on to his forearms tighter. Shit. Fuck. My heartbeat thundered. Were we really about to fuck after all these years? My need for him grew more urgent as I heard him unbuckle. Suddenly, the music stopped, replaced by my shrill phone, breaking me from the trance Prince and Jace had on me.
He felt the distance and kissed one of my ass cheeks while he pulled my leggings up. “Answer it.”
Still panting, I reached for the phone on the other side of the island. I checked the caller ID. “Telemarketing.”
He popped my ass before he moved away and adjusted his jeans that didn’t hide the large bulge in his pants which made my mouth water. “Come with me to Vegas. I was supposed to catch a red-eye tonight, but I can wait until tomorrow so you can go with me. Need to meet with my supplier.”
“To Vegas?” My stomach did flips and somersaults while I managed to calmly pour cream and butter into a pan and add some of the cheese. Vegas with Jace meant only one thing.
He leaned with his back against the island, watching me. “Yeah, you remember Malcolm Jacobs?”
“MJ? Of course.” Malcolm was Jace’s friend on the football team and went to my church. He was four years older than me, and Trinity used to have a mad crush on him.
“We get together sometimes, and that’s where I buy cannabis for the restaurant. He has a club.”
“Really?”
He popped a piece of cheese in his mouth. “Think it would be good for you to be in a city where there are no hang-ups about marijuana. I want you to feel comfortable around it, even if you don’t use it. This restaurant can get big, and I’m not supposed to be the face. I don’t want people to know I had anything to do with this place.” He quickly raised his hand, expecting my protest. “I want Embers by Kimble to be popular because it’s a good restaurant and not owned by a former Texan. You put in the hard work for the last five years, and now that it’s about to blow up, you should get all the credit.”
“How can you be so sure I’m about to blow up?”
He picked up the vial, placed a dab of liquid on his index finger, and placed it near my lips. “Suck it.” The timbre in the quiet command of his voice tapped into the submissive part of me I no longer realized existed.
I met his dark gaze and dared him. “Make me.”
“Under your tongue.” He pushed his finger under my tongue before I sucked on his thick, long digit without breaking eye contact. Jace cursed, “Woman, keep playing with me. I swear, I’ll have you so strung out on this dick.”
The taste was bitter. Yet I already wanted more, probably because of how he delivered it to me because I didn’t feel any different. Maybe it was the sexiness of the moment or that Prince’s Take Me With You now drifted around us. “Take me with you to Vegas before I change my mind? The workmen can manage to handle things in the restaurant for one day while we’re gone.”
“Like right now?”
I nodded, “We can buy what we need once we get there. I want you to fuck me all night in Vegas, and we return late tomorrow night. I can get my neighbor to watch my dog.”
“You have a dog?” his lips curved into a smile.
I smiled. “My baby, Roblé.”
“Like the chef?”
I said excitedly. “Yes, most people don’t make the connection.”
“I’m not most people.” He took the vial and dabbed more on his lips before he bent to kiss me. “How does it taste?”
I twisted my mouth at his easy way of kissing and touching me like he could at any time now that I agreed to fuck him. Still, I answered truthfully, “Bitter. Strong. Like coffee or dark chocolate. So, I need to probably sweeten the mac and cheese because I don’t want my customers to taste it.”
He folded his arms. “This is why you had to taste it. Even if I did, I can’t tell you how to make cannabis-infused mac and cheese like your mama made it, and you can’t tell the difference.”
“Noted.” I started pouring my cheese mixture over my noodles. “I guess I do need to buy in all the way.”
He grabbed a fork, dipped it in the Mac, and I popped his hand. “It’s not done.”
“Listen, you’re making my favorite dish. I’ll eat some now, and once you bake it.”
Suddenly, a fog I didn’t realize I had over my head lifted, and I blinked. He straightened up. “You good?”
“I think so.” I stared at him and then back at the food. “I feel light.”
“I can tell.” His eyes danced.
“I think I like this feeling.” My body seemed so light and free. My chest expanded, and I wanted to dance.
“Then we’re about to have fun in Vegas.”
“I’m getting fucked tonight by Jace Legend.” I raised my hands in victory, and some of the noodles and cheese on the ladle I forgot I had in my hand splattered on the floor behind me. Too relaxed to be embarrassed, I exclaimed, “Oops, my bad.”
He quickly wet a paper towel and wiped my mess while I danced and finished my mac and cheese. I heard him mutter from a distant place. “I hope I didn’t create a monster.”