Chapter 7
Tyler
I’m exhausted. I haven’t felt an ounce of calm since the day I walked away from Indiana at the hospital.
Running into her felt like I walked back in time. All the emotions swimming through my mind from the moment our eyes connected haven’t stopped. I’ve been restless every night and it’s been hard to focus, let alone sleep.
My head is swarming with thoughts of her son, the fact that she’s a mother, and the mere notion she has moved on in life.
I mentally prepared myself for the possibility that Indy was living a full life with someone else, but seeing it is something completely different.
While I’ve felt like I’m lost, stagnant in this world, still looking for my place without her and Georgie.
I might be putting on a brave face in front of millions on my social media platform, and in front of the guys at the station, but deep down it’s all a front.
I’ve worked hard in therapy ever since I got back to civilian life, to ensure I work through the trauma I was living in after watching Georgie be killed in front of me. Add in the destruction I witnessed nearly daily, I had gone through too much while I was in the military.
I’m aware that I see the difference in my truth now that I’m trying to live a new life here in Boston.
I’m balancing a new normal, that’s something my therapist always reminds me of.
What’s portrayed on my social media and what’s reality are two separate things.
Although I make a decent living with content creation, building my life here in Boston started to feel empty to me and I needed human connection.
The guys at the station help me feel like I can lean on people again, much like the camaraderie I had in the Army.
After I pushed Indy away years ago, I was able to self-reflect and learn from it.
My grief after losing Georgie truly took me to new depths.
I coped in the wrong way, and I dealt with it poorly.
She has no idea what I was dealing with, nor did I take the time back then to use my words to explain.
I shut down and used lies to hide my truth.
Now, all those feelings have come flooding back since running into her.
Seeing Indiana succeeding in life is all the confirmation I needed to know that walking away from her was the right thing to do. I can’t bring her down by telling her the truth behind what I did and ruin her life, but it doesn’t take away from my heartache.
What’s even more fucked about this entire situation is the fact that she’s got a child while she’s still married to me.
After leaving the hospital, I had a moment of panic thinking Noah could be mine and Indy had kept him from me out of spite.
But before I spiraled, I remembered overhearing the school nurse whisper that his father passed away while updating us when we asked about his parents’ arrival.
It didn’t keep me from waiting outside that hospital room in hopes of seeing Indy for a moment the following morning after my shift.
I finally pulled myself away and went home, realizing I was acting like a crazed stalker and thought it best to head to back to my place.
The last person she wants to see is me after the pain I put her through.
The guys and their significant others have forced me out of the house today and we’re meeting at a park. They said I can’t avoid them any longer since I haven’t explained the whole surprise marriage bomb to them.
I’m the first to arrive at the park, so I’m sitting on the grass, watching a few families playing with their kids. It’s a sunny day, not a cloud in the sky. I leave my ball cap on, shielding me from the sun, watching people run around in the warmth of the spring day.
“Hunter, hey,” Clay says as he makes his way over with the stroller.
“Hi. Want some help?” I ask him as he carries a few extra items in his hands to set up stuff for Ella to sit.
“I think I’ve got it. Thanks though.” Clay locks the stroller and starts setting up a play area for her, with a play mat that has a shaded cover for her. Ella babbles in her stroller and I stand up to greet her.
“Hi, Ella. Do you remember me?” I ask her as I tickle her feet. She gestures with her hands, then stuffs one of her fists in her mouth, smiling. Her big, blue eyes, matching her mother’s, look up at me, while her dimples pop out to greet me.
“Hi, Hunter. How are you?” Abby meets up with us.
“Hey, Abby. Good. Ella’s getting big.” I look over my shoulder.
“She is. Time’s moving too fast. I hear you’ve been keeping a few secrets.” She winks at me.
“Geez, they’re such gossips.” I roll my eyes.
“You have no idea.” She chuckles.
She makes her way over to the stroller and talks to Ella, unbuckling her, then pulling her out. Ella immediately latches on to her hair, pulling at her mother’s long locks.
“No, no, sweet girl. What did Mama say about pulling hair?” Abby says.
“Mama,” Ella says while trying to put said hair in her mouth.
Clay looks over and simply smiles. I didn’t meet either of them before Abby gave birth, but I’ve heard stories about how rocky things were for them.
It seems their relationship has been through an ordeal to get to this point.
Whatever hardships they’ve endured, I’m glad they’ve made it to this point, because when I see him look at Abby, all that’s reflected is love and adoration in his eyes.
And this beautiful baby they’ve created is perfection.
“Alright, Ella, your play area awaits,” he says, pride evident in his tone.
Abby puts their daughter down and she’s immediately entertained with the toys they brought. We’ll see how long it lasts. She’s already crawling and wants to be on the go.
“Hi, everyone,” we hear a voice greet us. I look over to see Kennedy with Lola. I look beyond her, but don’t see River.
“Where’s River?” Clay asks, a little concerned.
“He said he had to grab something, so he’ll be meeting us here.” Kennedy shrugs while she hugs everyone. The minute she gets to me, she whispers, “I hear you’re a big secret-keeper in the group.”
“Am I seriously going to be harassed all day about this?” I ask.
“Yes!” all three of them say at the same time.
I roll my eyes and give them an exasperated look. I’m about to say more when I’m gladly interrupted by Malloy and Baylee.
“The party has arrived,” Malloy says, pulling me in a big bear hug. “You’re a fucker for keeping me in the dark, man,” he says in my ear.
“Dude, I’ve never told a soul, if it makes you feel any better.” I look at him.
“It’s fine man. I sort of had a feeling you were keeping something hidden in there. But I’ll say, you are a damn mystery, Hunter. What else are you hiding?” he asks with a smile.
“I swear, that’s it!” I tell him.
He pulls me into a hug. “Well, you’ve gotta fill us in. Tell us all about this girl.”
“Let’s wait for River. He’ll be here soon,” Kennedy says.
“Where is he?” Baylee asks as she greets everyone.
“I knew it was too quiet. Plus, Ella is being left in peace; that should’ve been my first clue. She’s usually snatched up by now,” Malloy says.
“He said he had to run an errand,” Kennedy tells Malloy, shrugging.
He raises an eyebrow at her. I might not have been around very long, but even I know that’s suspicious as hell when it comes to River. He must be up to something. Hopefully whatever it is takes the heat off my not-so-little secret.
We get a few snacks out and get situated.
I brought a football and frisbee so we can play later.
Malloy and I get a few chairs set up while Kennedy and Baylee sit with Ella on the ground.
Abby uses this time to take a break and eat some food.
Once things are set up, I’m standing and talking to the group, when I see River approaching.
It isn’t until he’s getting closer that I notice his outfit. I do a double-take.
“What the hell is happening? Am I seeing double?” I ask him.
“Well, yeah. We’re twins,” River says as if I’m clueless.
“No shit, man. But you’re wearing the same outfit, dipshit,” I say the inappropriate words under my breath for Ella not to hear.
As soon as I say the words, everyone turns their attention to River, who has made it closer to our group.
The moment Kennedy notices her fiancé’s attire, she buries her face in her hands, mortified.
Abby seems used to River’s antics at this point, while Malloy’s giddy, probably wishing he had a bucket of popcorn.
Baylee mimics an attendee at a tennis match, her eyes volleying back and forth, likely unsure how this will play out.
“That’s not the outfit you left the house in, sweetie,” Kennedy calls River out.
“Yeah, I know,” River answers, his focus on his twin. He’s completely fucking around with Clay and he knows it. The question is why.
Clay has his lips in a straight line, not finding this game amusing at all. I’m simply watching what River’s play is here.
“River, baby, what the heck are you doing?” Kennedy asks.
“I just really like this outfit, so I felt like changing.” He crosses his arms across his chest.
“Is that why you called and harassed me about my outfit earlier?” Clay asks.
River continues the stare down with his brother until Clay breaks it and looks over at Abby.
“You’re fucking losing it, Riv,” Clay says.
“I just look up to you. Remember, you are older.” He smiles, but there’s nothing sweet about it.
“By two minutes,” Clay says through clenched teeth. “You’re a real dicksickle, you know that? Isn’t this a bit stalkerish, even for you?”
River ignores his brother’s comments and gets a sly look on his face, walking over to his niece. With the way both are dressed today, it’s hard to tell them apart and it isn’t until this very moment that I start to put the puzzle pieces together.
“Ella, baby,” River says. He smiles at her. Ella looks up at him. You can see her do a double-take between Clay and River, trying to assess the situation.