Chapter 48
Indiana
“I’ll be right next to you the entire time,” Tyler reassures me for what feels like the millionth time as he parks his truck along the curb.
I’m looking outside the window at the house where I know my biological parents are inside waiting for me. I only nod in acknowledgment. I can’t help the butterflies that are multiplying inside my stomach. The anticipation is killing me.
It’s been four days since that phone call from Theo.
Due to the stress of the last few days, I’ve had a Crohn’s flare up, requiring me to stay home this week to recover.
Kalli has been worried about me since I received the news, calling Tyler to make sure there isn’t anything else she can do.
I’ve been restless waiting for Jerry and Scarlet to arrive.
Aside from his shift two days ago, Ty has been by my side providing support in whatever way possible.
Noah has been none the wiser in all this, having the best time with Tyler at our place, cooking and playing at the park after school.
They’ve been watching movies, making me dinner, and playing board games.
School is out soon, meaning his birthday is fast approaching.
Aside from sending invitations out, I’ve barely done a thing.
Once this meeting happens, I need to get things done for Noah’s celebration. I can’t drop the ball for my sweet boy.
Tyler cuts the engine and we’re left with silence. “Indy, baby, look at me.” He grabs my hand and squeezes.
At night, he’s held me and let me feel the comfort I need while I’ve processed the emotional roller coaster this news has hit me with. I truly believed Tyler was going to freak out and run away, but I didn’t put enough weight on the fact that this was going to hit me hard.
After Tyler hung up with Jerry and Scarlet, a wave of emotions washed over me and I felt overwhelmed with how this was going to change my life.
I don’t know if I’m prepared for the explanation they’re going to give me as to why they gave me up.
Add to that, why they chose to keep George only a few years later.
“Come on. You can do this.” He picks up my hand and kisses my knuckles. I look over at him and give him a weak smile.
“What if I can’t?” I ask him, my voice cracking at the end.
“You’ve been through so much worse, Indy,” he tells me. “I know you can do it. Plus, you’re not going through any of this alone, remember? You’ve got me and Noah every step of the way.”
I nod, looking down.
He drops my hand and grabs my cheeks with his palms, leaning over to drop his forehead to mine.
His eyes settle on me and all I feel is lost in his gaze.
“Indy, you are the strongest woman I know. Whatever happens in there, it won’t change that.
No matter what you find out today, you’ll leave with answers about your past. But it won’t change who you are.
You’ve grown to be a capable, beautiful, and strong person.
That’s what everyone sees because that’s what you are.
Noah sees it, and so do I. Don’t let their decisions decades ago make you feel otherwise. ”
Just like he did eleven years ago, Tyler reminds me that I can do so much more than I give myself credit for. I smile and bring my lips to his. At first the kiss starts softly, then I deepen our connection.
“I’m glad I married you all those years ago,” I tell him after I pull away.
He weaves his hands through my hair, stealing another brief kiss, before he opens his door. He makes his way around the truck and opens my passenger door, extending his hand. I take it and step out of the car, smoothing my dress.
When I take a breath, hoping to calm my nerves, I look over at Ty and give him a small nod. No matter what, today I’ll get the answers I’ve been seeking regarding my birth parents. If I get to form a relationship with them, that will be a bonus.
Since finding out this connection with Jerry and Scarlet, Tyler has been nothing but attentive with me. He’s been dividing his time between staying here at the house and being with me. Luckily, he picked me up today to accompany me here, so I don’t have to confront my biological parents on my own.
We clasp our hands and start walking toward the front door. We’re about to ring the doorbell when the front door swings open. A gentleman greets us, and Tyler’s face breaks out in a reserved smile.
Tyler stands beside me, his hand on my lower back, letting me feel his strength, as I walk toward the only two people that can give me answers.
The man at the door has his focus solely on me.
A woman is behind him, her eyes watching my every step.
My breath hitches as I stare at the only people I’ve ever met that are biologically related to me.
“Hi,” I say in a whispered tone.
“Hi, Indiana,” Jerry says.
“Indiana,” Scarlet says, moving forward so she’s in full view.
They both look tired, maybe from travel, but I’d assume from days lacking sleep. This news has caused anxiety for them too.
“Jerry, Scarlet, can we come in?” Tyler interjects.
“Of course,” they’re still staring at me, but move out of our way for us to pass through. “Why don’t we sit at the kitchen table?”
“Sounds good,” Ty grabs my hand and interlaces our fingers.
We make our way through the house and I know how awkward this has been for them. There’s a layer of tension, excitement, and apprehension as we walk to the table.
“Can I get anyone something to drink or eat?” Scarlet offers.
“Why don’t I grab some waters and you three sit down.” Tyler looks at me and I give him a slight nod.
I move to sit down, the awkwardness settling back between us at the table. Tyler brings the drinks to us, then rests his hand on my leg, which has started to shake nervously.
“How was your trip home?” Ty begins. I notice he’s trying to calm me down.
“Everything was pretty good. I thought they were going to lose our luggage, but, in the end, that wasn’t the case.” Scarlet fiddles with the side of her cup.
From the way the two of them look at me cautiously, they’re just as nervous as I am.
Even though I’m pushing thirty, I feel like a child in this moment.
It’s like I’m a little girl; my parents sitting across from me, waiting to say something to explain my behavior.
Except, I’m waiting for them to say something to explain theirs.
Looking at the two of them, I realize what a mix of the two of them I am.
Tyler said George had a funny personality, always making jokes and trying to make the guys around him laugh.
In all the pictures, his grin is wide. There was something welcoming about him in all the stills I got to see.
My younger brother was in his combat uniform and fatigues in the photos Tyler showed me.
As I walked through the house after finding out my relation to him, I appreciated the photos with a new perspective.
But sitting across from Jerry and Scarlet now, I see them in a whole new light.
Now that I’m sitting across from Jerry, I can tell George favored our father.
“George looked a lot like you,” I say.
Jerry smiles, his eyes quickly moving to Tyler, then back to me. “Yes, everyone says that.” He looks down at the table. “George may have looked like me, but he was one hundred percent Scarlet.” He looks over at his wife.
I can’t contain it any longer and I blurt out the question that’s been nagging me the entire time. “Why did you give me up? Was I not good enough?”
The small smiles that both were holding drop and I can see the disappointment push through their features.
Jerry exhales and I can tell whatever pain he’s holding is let go in that breath. “Absolutely not. I know how it must seem, but—”
I interrupt him, “You gave me up then had George. I need to understand why. It makes no sense to me, after just four years you’d keep him but let me go. Explain it to me.”
I see Scarlet and Jerry look at one another, then turn their attention back to me. I can see the pain radiating across their faces.
Scarlet takes a deep breath, looking down at the table and smoothing her hands on the lacquered wood.
“Jerry and I are high school sweethearts, but our parents weren’t too happy we were dating.” She looks over at him and gives him a small smile that holds so much love. He grabs her hand, and she seems to find the courage to keep going.
“We started dating freshman year and got pregnant when I was only fifteen with you; I gave birth when I was sixteen. Both our parents deemed we were too young to be parents. We had no means at the time to go off and get jobs. We tried to prove we could, but we knew nothing about life.”
She hangs her head and I see her swipe at a stray tear on her cheek.
“Scar and I wanted so badly to take you away and start our little family, but we also wanted what was best for you. So, we listened to our families. They told us you’d be given to a family that could give you so much more than we ever could.
We were promised it was going to be an open adoption.
We were so naive to the process, Indiana.
All in all, we were ill-informed.” He sighs, running his hand through his salt and pepper hair.
“Once a few weeks had passed, and I had recovered a bit postpartum, I had asked if I could write a letter to your adoptive parents to request a picture. That’s when I discovered it was, in fact, a closed adoption.
I broke down. I went through a pretty dark time after that.
We both did.” She looks at Jerry, more tears streaming down her cheeks.
“The way my parents lied to us regarding your adoption was unforgivable. I tried finding you, hiring people, but I had no luck on my own. I just waited, hoping one day you’d come looking for us. ”