23. Baylee
Baylee
I made it to Connecticut earlier today and nervously had my meeting with my prosecutor a few hours ago.
Going through the case, especially walking through the details of everything, felt nauseating.
I’m glad she went through it though, because tomorrow won’t be any easier.
Seeing those photos of me immediately following the attack was brutal, but I think it was better to see them ahead of tomorrow.
It’s amazing what our brain will do to preserve itself to help us cope from tragedy.
In order to survive a hard time, I have felt like I remember the severity of that night in such a different way.
Now that I see how much damage he caused me physically, I see just how significant this is and how devastating this will be if I don’t ensure Myles serves time for what he did.
It makes me sick to think he could do this again.
The moment I left Mrs. Lupchick’s office—or should I say Fiona because she kept insisting I call her by her first name—I’m more determined to see Myles learn his lesson.
No aggressor should walk away unscathed from something like this.
He deserves to serve time. And Baylee Rios is no doormat.
I called Tucker right after my meeting with Fiona to tell him how it went, and he was proud of me for that first step.
I couldn’t help the tears I shed. But I took a deep breath and told him I won’t let that deter me tomorrow.
I’m determined to see this through. I’ll look Myles in the eyes in the morning and show him he didn’t tear me down.
Now, I’m sitting in my old apartment with my girlfriends having a girls’ night.
This moment feels bittersweet because so much of this feels like my old life, like I’ve never left.
Pieces of this are so comfortable to me, but I also don’t want to go backward because I’ve gained so much from the life I’m living in Boston.
I know the three of them will always be in my life in some way.
“Alright, so we got the update from the prosecutor, but what’s the fun update you had for us?”
They already know everything between Tucker and I, but I told them I had something fun to tell them. However, I kept my text vague as to what it was.
“Well, last night, I met someone you might be interested in hearing about,” I pull out my phone and open my Photos app.
“Oh my gosh,” Brianna squeals. “Is it someone on the baseball team. Aren’t you friends with the Gael’s CEO or something?”
“Um, yeah, sort of. We’re not that close yet, but she’s really awesome. Maybe I can swing a baseball player meet and greet your way. But no, that’s not the surprise,” I say as I pull up the photo I want to show them.
I swing my phone to face them and all three gape at the picture in question. It’s one of Hunter and I from last night, smiling from ear to ear, mostly at Tucker who is hidden on the other side of the screen scowling at us. My friends do a double take, their eyes nearly bug out of their heads.
“No. Fucking. Way!” Mandy yells. “When? Where? How?”
Alexis takes my phone from me and pinches the photo to inspect it, probably wondering if it’s photoshopped. “Tell me how this happened right this very minute!”
“Turns out he moved to Boston and…” I take a dramatic pause, “he joined Tucker’s firehouse.”
The three of them scream.
“That’s fucking bananas!” Brianna gasps.
“What are the chances?” Alexis yells.
“That’s it! I’m moving!” Mandy declares.
I’m laughing as the three of them lose their shit.
The rest of the night continues with the four of us going back and forth laughing, exchanging stories and simply soaking up time together.
They never found a replacement roommate, so I sleep in my old room, and it feels like old times, but something is missing.
I don’t feel like the same Baylee that used to sleep here.
I’ve been chasing the old Baylee, hoping she’ll return, but I think that version of myself will never quite come back to me. As much as I’ve been looking for her to re-emerge, a new version has erupted from the darkness. This Baylee is stronger and more equipped for what’s ahead.
As I try to fall asleep, I close my eyes, picturing the ugly monster that lies ahead in the morning.
But his clear blue eyes don’t bring on the same terrors they once did.
I’m no longer absorbing his words and believing I’m weak inside.
Tomorrow, I get the opportunity to show him exactly who he tried to knock down and how I rose up despite his efforts.
“Remember what we discussed yesterday,” Fiona whispers my way.
I nod as I sit next to her. I look up at the clock and realize we still have thirty minutes before everything begins. I’m antsy and need to move around.
“Do you think I can run to the restroom?” I look at her .
“Of course. You doing okay?” She looks at me, concerned.
“Yes. I just downed a ton of water this morning,” I tell her.
I was so nervous I drank way too much water in fear I would be dehydrated. I may have overdone it. I internally roll my eyes. Myles’s team still hasn’t arrived, so I know I have some time.
I move through the courtroom and walk into the hall. Luckily the restroom is close by, and I push through to the door to the women’s bathroom.
Once inside, I find an open stall. The courthouse is quiet and there’s not much foot traffic throughout.
I’m washing my hands when I hear the door open.
I’m not looking up, nor paying much attention to anything around me, when I feel a presence behind me.
It isn’t until I realize the body is much too close to my personal space that my hackles rise, and I look in the mirror to see those cold blue eyes staring back at me.
I say nothing as I hold his gaze, and it’s in that moment I take note how different we are, as if we’re complete opposites.
His lightness in contrast with my darker features.
His ice blue eyes to my almost black ones, along with his lighter hair to my raven locks.
But inside, he holds all the darkness, while I hold all my light around me.
“Move,” I demand.
He stands firm where he is. He wouldn’t dare do anything mere feet away from the courtroom where he’s being tried for assaulting me, would he? But his entitled ass might actually be living in an absolute fantasy, I guess.
“Should I say it louder?” I say with clenched teeth.
He steps away, his nostrils flaring.
I keep my eyes on him as I grab a paper towel. I won’t fucking dare give him my back because he’s fucking hostile.
When I make my way to the door he has the audacity to move closer to me, but not close enough to touch me. I feel my heart pounding in my ears, but I tame my breathing enough so he doesn’t sense my fear.
“You fucking ruined my life,” he spits in my direction. “I should’ve known a whore like you would fuck everything up. I was left here while you were away living your best life, and I now have to pay for your little sad story that you told the police.”
“The only person who ruined your life is you, Myles. And—wait, how do you know anything about my life?” I ask him, realization dawning on me that he knows more about me than I’d like.
I look over at him, realizing that day when I felt like I was being watched was more than a feeling. Was he there?
“Oh, you connecting the dots? Yeah, I watched you, sweetheart.” He sneers. God, he’s vile . “You’re a fucking temptress. I saw you walking on campus and guys just watched you pass by in your tight clothes, because you just ask to be looked at. You’re a disgusting slut.”
I tamp down the bile that threatens to come up. How did I ever find this person attractive? I let him put his hands on me. I let him touch me in the name of love... or what I thought was love.
“Look over there.” I jut my chin toward the mirror.
“You see that person right there?” I move a step back so it’s only his reflection he sees.
“He’s no man. That right there is a person that’s a sad excuse for a man.
I’m sorry I ever let your fingers touch my skin because I was always too good for you.
But today I’m not just standing up for myself against you; I’m standing up for all the people you could ever raise your hand to in the future. You need help, Myles.”
He pulls his gaze away from the mirror and moves toward me, and I get the feeling he’s going to do something physical to me. I stand there and continue, “Ah ah, I wouldn’t think of doing anything. Mommy can’t dig you out of an even deeper hole. Better keep your hands to yourself. ”
With that, I walk out of the restroom, a satisfied smile gracing my lips.
Serves him right for thinking he can continue to try to intimidate me right before this pre-trial.
But he knows the evidence we have will push this case even further.
He knows his fate and he just needed to knock me down a few pegs to help his ego before I knock him down.
Once I reach Fiona, I sit down and she sees me smiling.
“Everything okay?” she asks, confusion in her tone.
“Yep. Myles followed me into the restroom and used a few toxic words to intimidate me. I didn’t fall for it,” I tell her, smoothing out my skirt.
She looks behind me and sees Myles walking into the courtroom, his complexion a few shades lighter than he was when he first walked into the ladies’ room.
“Serves him right,” I continue.
“I bet it does.” She smiles.
I feel lighter walking into the apartment tonight. Today was draining, yet absolutely freeing in so many ways. Facing that courtroom was something I needed to do on my own, but getting home to Tucker is also a need of mine and I’m itching to feel his warmth underneath my fingertips.
The moment I open the door, I expect to see him waiting for me on the other side, but instead I’m met by not only Tucker, but my parents, my brother, my sisters, and Carolyn.
I can’t hold back the surprise on my face. I think Tucker senses it when I look over at him.