Chapter 24
Chapter Twenty-Four
After an afternoon of meeting with the council, planning, and packing, Sterling and I are finally alone together.
His eyes smolder with a molten gleam as they track me across our bedchamber, though I absorb other details as well…
the way his shoulders sag, how his fingers fidget with the edge of his sleeve. A habit he’d vehemently deny.
Too much time has passed since we’ve been alone together. I’ve spent too many days with only the memory of his voice to keep me company. Now he’s here and I find myself suddenly tongue-tied, unsure of how to bridge the gap that absence carved between us.
“What happened while I was gone?” He attempts to sound casual, but I don’t miss the underlying strain.
“Later,” I say as I cross the room. I don’t want our reunion tainted by plots and politics.
He reaches for me as if on instinct, hands settling on my hips when I step between his knees. The familiar warmth of his touch seeps through the fabric of my breeches, and a jolt of awareness shoots through me.
I’ve missed this. I’ve missed us.
He draws me down onto his lap, and I go willingly, straddling his legs.
“First, a bath.” After spending the night in a cave, there’s no way I’m going to make love with Sterling until I’m clean.
His throaty laughter rumbles through me as he lifts his arm, sniffs his armpit, and scrunches his nose in an exaggerated manner that pulls a chuckle out of me too. “That bad? Bathing in rivers isn’t the same as bathing here, but—”
“No, you smell like home.” I cup his cheek with my palm and gently stroke the stubble. “But as much as I want you, I think we’ll both feel better if we washed up first.”
The hard lines of his face melt into something softer. “You just want to get me naked.” His hands slide up my back. “And I’m okay with that.”
“And wet. And lathered up.”
I press a quick kiss to his lips before standing. He accepts the hand I offer, allowing me to lead him into the adjoining bathing chamber.
The room has become one of my favorites in the palace.
A high-ceilinged space with warm stone floors and an enormous tub fed by hot springs that run deep beneath Tirene.
Steam rises from the surface of the water, curling upward in lazy tendrils.
I busy myself with the jars of fragrant herbs on a nearby shelf, selecting dried lavender and mint.
Sterling stands behind me, close enough that I can feel his warmth, but not touching. I’m acutely aware of him observing me as I sprinkle the herbs into the water and release their scent into the steam. “I missed this.”
I pivot to face him, my fingers slipping to his shirt fastenings. “The bath?”
“You.” He allows me to undress him. “Just…you.”
I work in silence, sliding the fabric from his shoulders. New scars ravage his skin alongside the old ones I know by heart. My gut clenches as my fingertips trace one on his ribs that’s still pink with healing.
“It’s nothing. A careless moment.” His body still carries the lean muscles of a soldier, but the fatigue shows in the slope of his shoulders, in the subtle hollows beneath his cheekbones. Whatever he found on his journey has taken a toll.
For now, I opt not to press him and instead continue undressing him until he stands naked before me. As always, the sight of him steals my breath, and my lower belly dips.
No one could argue that Knox Sterling Barda isn’t a magnificent specimen of a man.
He steps into the tub with a grateful sigh, sinking down until the water reaches his chest. I gather soap and a cloth and kneel at the edge of the tub. We’ve shared the intimacy of me washing him before, this simple act of care.
He catches my hand, thumb stroking my knuckles in a gentle caress. “Tell me something sweet. Something from home.”
So I share stories while I bathe him. I talk about the daily ongoings of the palace in his absence as the cool night wind sings through the umberheart trees.
I work the cloth down his arm. “The Bricklayer’s Guild had their quarterly meeting.”
Sterling grunts, signaling his mild irritation. “Let me guess. They’re trying to get out of the Eastern District repairs again.”
“They tried.” I offer a sly smile. “I reminded them of their contractual obligations.”
“Good decision.” His eyelids slide to half-mast as my fingers trail through his silky locks. “They’ll respect you more for it.”
I tell him more about the two newborn dragons. How the hatchlings stumbled on wobbly legs, their wings still damp and clinging to their sides and their big eyes blinking.
Sterling’s wet hands capture my wrists mid-sentence. “Join me.”
When I glimpse the vulnerability shining in his eyes—a softness he only reveals to me—I know I can’t refuse.
I undress wordlessly, my skin growing hot beneath his intense stare. The moment I slip into the water beside him, he tugs me close, yanking my back against his chest so his arms can encircle me.
“Now it’s your turn.” I settle against his water-slicked skin. “Tell me something wonderful.”
With his lips press to my temple, his voice rumbles through me as he begins to speak.
He talks of a coastline where the sand shimmers like crushed diamonds, of caves with walls that glow blue in the darkness.
He describes birds with wings spanning twice my height that soar above mountains so tall their peaks disappear into clouds.
I close my eyes, letting his words paint pictures in my mind.
His hands sketch erotic patterns on my skin. “I wish you could have seen it all. But at least we’re going together tomorrow. After this last trip, I refuse to go on a journey like that without you ever again.”
“Promise?” I twist in his embrace to meet his eyes, causing the water to lap gently around us.
Instead of answering, he kisses me, slowly and deliberately. He cradles my face as if I might break. I taste his longing, his relief at being home. When we part, his forehead rests against mine, and our breath mingles in the space between us.
“I promise.” His hands slip down my sides, tracing the contours of my body as if recommitting the curves to memory. “Being without you is pure torture. Every day is long, boring, dreadful, and bland. Like my senses are dulled and the world is just a terrible place.”
“Tedious. Joyless. Gray.” My own hands wander, finding the places where he’s most sensitive. The hollow of his throat, the inside of his wrist. The spot just below his ear that makes him shiver whenever I stroke or kiss it.
Abruptly, he gathers me into his arms and lifts me. As he stands, water cascades from our bodies, and I wrap my legs around his waist. My pulse begins to accelerate as he carries me to the padded stone bench against the wall.
He lays me down with a gentleness that causes my heart to ache, his eyes never straying from mine. “I thought of you every minute of every day. Every night spent without you. You even filled my dreams.”
I pull him down to me, needing to experience the delicious sensation of his weight on my body. “Show me.”
Sterling takes his time, as if we have all the hours in the world at our disposal. His lips skim a leisurely path from my mouth to my neck, across my collarbone, between my breasts. Every touch is reverent, calculated, and draws small whimpers from me that echo in the steam-filled chamber.
We touch each other with the synchronicity of lovers who know each other’s bodies intimately. There’s no hurry, no desperation. Just the slow, heavy pleasure of reconnection.
With our eyes closed, our bodies slide together without hesitation. Lips to chests. Hands to thighs. My ankles around his waist in a position that feels as second-nature as breathing. My nails trail down his scalp.
His hands find mine, and our fingers interlock as he positions himself above me. “Look at me.”
I do, holding his heated gaze as he enters me with exquisite tenderness. While he joins us together as one, I watch the play of emotions on his face. Pleasure, yes. But also relief, love.
Home.
I lift my hips to meet him, and we set into a rhythm as ancient as the stone beneath us.
The world narrows to just us while his body and mine move together in the dim light and damp heat. The harsh rasp of our breathing grows more ragged as we climb toward release, as his hand slips between us and strokes the center of my desire.
When I shatter, it’s with his name on my lips. My fingers press into his shoulders hard enough to leave marks. Moments later, he follows, burying his face in the curve of my neck while a tremor racks his powerful body.
That felt like a homecoming. Emphasis on coming.
I giggle at the thought, then wrap my body tighter around him, holding him close and deep within me. I never want to let him go again.
His skin is chilled, so I call my flames to the surface. He groans and melts on top of me. “You’re the best…everything.”
“Not the best pillow though.” I rotate my shoulders, trying to get comfortable now that we’re not lost in our lovemaking.
“I’d have to disagree.” Sterling sits up, but I cling to him, forcing him to lift me as well. He grips my thighs as he carries me to our bed. “Let’s get a little more comfortable. I promised you twelve orgasms, and I’m nothing if not a man of my word.”
Sometime later, exhaustion finally overtakes us.
We drift off tangled together, skin to skin, and for the first time since he left, I sleep without nightmares.
Morning arrives too soon, and we quickly find ourselves surrounded by packs and travel accessories. Servants shuffle in and out of our chamber, bringing supplies and removing items deemed unnecessary.
Sterling and I eat standing up, snatching bites between instructions and preparations. Agnar, still appearing weary from his last journey, materializes with maps and spreads them across a table already cluttered with equipment.
He points to a spot on one of the maps. “We need to leave by midday if we want to reach the foothills before dark.”
Sterling swallows a mouthful of a savory pastry. “We’ll make better time than before since we know exactly where we’re going and don’t need to stop to investigate along the way.”
I pick at my food while my mind races ahead to the journey before us. This time, I’ll be going too. Seeing what they found, what they missed.
Keeping Sterling within reach.
The thought instills me with equal parts excitement and dread. “We need to decide who will govern in our absence. The kingdom needs a steward.”
Sterling frowns, considering. “It can’t be one of the council members. Too much risk of favoritism.”
“It needs to be someone who understands what’s happening.” I set my food down. “Someone who knows the situation…who we can trust absolutely.”
We trade a glance, still silently weighing options when Agnar bends to grab the last pack from the floor. “Bastian, of course.”
The simplicity strikes me immediately.
He’s right. Bastian is the obvious choice.
Through his research, he possesses intimate knowledge about what we’re confronting. He’s also the queen’s half-brother, which grants him legitimacy without giving him a claim to the throne. And I’d be willing to bet that he knows the laws of Tirene better than either Sterling or I do.
“That’s perfect.” Relief floods through me. “Bastian would be an excellent steward.”
Sterling nods his agreement. “He has the breeding, the knowledge, and the loyalty. And the council won’t intimidate him.”
I call over Astrid, who’s been hovering nearby with her portable writing desk. “Please draft the paperwork for Bastian to serve as our royal steward in our absence. I want us all to sign it before we leave.”
She bows and hurries away, leaving us to continue our preparations.
Sterling adjusts the strap of a pack. “Hope Leesa’s ready to be a surrogate queen.”
I smile at the thought of my sister in that role.
She’d be good at it, actually. But a twinge of guilt lurks beneath the humor.
I know exactly how Bastian will feel about getting left behind again.
Though he’ll understand the importance of his role and the trust we’re placing in him, he’ll also experience the sting of exclusion in the same way I did when Sterling left without me.
Some separations are necessary, I remind myself. Some burdens must be carried alone. Yet, as I watch Sterling check his weapons one last time, relief swells in my chest when I remind myself that this time, we’ll face the unknown together.