Chapter 35
THIRTY-FIVE
ARIELLA
‘Urrrrggh, Caleb! You’re sweaty and horrible,’ I complain.
He has settled into a good work routine that ensures that we spend evenings together, and the fight studio is coming along nicely. He has just come back from working all day, dropped his bag by the door and grabbed me from behind as I am finishing the last dishes for the shelter.
‘I can’t help it. You’re so round and juicy…’ he says, putting his lips on my neck as he unzips my dress.
‘Stop undressing me, Black, this risotto is hot.’ Too late. My dress falls, only for the straps to catch at my elbows. He gently runs his hand over my tender breasts.
‘They are so full.’
I want to shoo him away, but he feels good too. Even sweaty. I drop the risotto and turn to face him. The look in his eyes tells me that we’re doing this. My bra pings open and, as Caleb introduces his tongue to mine, he teases the straps to meet those of my dress at my elbows before he brushes my breast with the palm of his hand and I surrender.
With one quick movement, Caleb lifts me in to him and carries me to the end of the kitchen island, then plops me on the counter. He takes the clip out of my hair and lets it fall.
‘Fuck, Aari, you’re beautiful,’ he says, before covering his mouth with mine. I’m pretty certain I look a mess with my clothes half on, hiked up and my hair absolutely everywhere. Caleb moves on to my body as he runs his tongue down my neck, chest and breasts, circling a nipple before taking it into his mouth. It feels so good, I let out a small whimper, making him stop.
‘Are you okay?’ he asks, deeply concerned.
‘More than okay,’ I gasp.
‘You have to tell me if you’re not, Mason.’
He looks unsure until I lean forward and slide my hand under his soft navy track bottoms. The moan he produces as he closes his eyes and tips his head up to the ceiling only fuels my fire. I move my hand, slowly stroking him, his hips responding to my touch. When his movements get urgent, I snake my other hand up his shirt and dig my nails into his back.
‘Shit. Okay. That’s enough fun and games.’
Caleb slides me off the counter before turning me to face it.
‘Put your hands where I can see them, bend over and spread your legs, Aari.’
I do as I am told, and bend over the counter. Caleb slowly lifts the bottom part of my dress up before pulling my underwear down to my ankles and instructing me to step out of them. I comply, keen to feel him inside me. My anticipation builds as Caleb traces his fingers up my leg and past my knee. He touches me between my legs so lightly, I push against his hand.
‘Don’t move, Mason.’
He touches me, again so lightly that I push against him, and he removes his hand.
‘So how was your day?’ he asks softly.
‘Caleb, right now, I can’t think of a single thing I did today,’ I pant. He reintroduces his hand and gives me the gift of a little stroke.
‘Want to know what I did?’
‘No.’
Caleb chuckles.
‘That’s not nice.’ He barely touches me again and I want to scream.
‘You’re dripping, Aari.’
More pressure this time as he slides a single finger over me. He holds my hips steady and away from the counter edge, then enters me slowly.
‘Oh, Caleb,’ I exhale.
And that’s when I hear his first grunt. Nothing beats Caleb’s moans when we’re like this. They’re deep, soft sounds of pleasure, frustration and urgency. If he was doing nothing else, that alone would undo me. As his long, slow strokes start to build, I am ahead of him. He pushes inside me hard and I know.
‘Caleb…’
‘Fuck, Aari.’
He pushes harder and faster as I explode. He’s not far behind, holding my hips safely away from the edge of the kitchen island as he pours himself into me.
‘I’ve been thinking about doing that all day, Mason. You almost had me here at lunchtime. Twice. You’re just so mmmmmm!’
‘After this morning?’
‘Especially after this morning.’
He helps me up, turns me round and kisses me deeply.
‘So I was thinking, Jack’s out tonight with his mystery woman. Another loaded one, I think. Want to spend the night in the flat one last time before the sale completes?’
I’m excited to go back to the flat.
‘Maybe the three of us could sleep over?’ he says, gently stroking our bump.
‘I’d love that.’
‘Okay, but I’m not taking you out in this state, Mason. You’re covered in sweat. What have you been doing?’ Caleb smiles into our kiss and leads me upstairs into the shower with him.
Returning to the flat where all this started makes me a little nostalgic. We have a new home with new beginnings, but the last time we were here we were broken. Saying goodbye together before we move on feels right.
When Caleb unlocks the door there is a beautiful yellow glow and, as I walk in, I see that all the surfaces have been covered with candles and my favourite flowers. I spot an ice bucket with a bottle of Bollinger chilling next to two glasses as Caleb leads me into the centre of the flat.
‘It’s so beautiful.’
‘I wanted tonight to be special. I thought we could have dinner, watch The Sopranos and fall asleep on the couch.’
‘I think that’s a great idea.’
‘But before we do…’
I watch Caleb descend to one knee in the middle of the flat.
‘Ariella Mason, before you walked into my office, I couldn’t have dreamed or wished for you if I tried; because everything that made sense to me back then needed to be dismantled. And you did that. You saved me from the suffocating choke of fear, loneliness, insecurity and shame. My suffering was so familiar, I’d forgotten it was there. It’s taken a lot for us to get here, Aari. You’ve had to forgive the unforgivable in me. Love the unlovable in me. Believe the unbelievable in me. Trust me, being with you was no picnic, but that was mostly because I had a lot of growing up to do.’
‘Mostly?’ I laugh softly.
‘Yes, mostly. You know all the shit you put me through.’ Caleb chuckles. ‘But I’d go through it all again to be here, right now, exactly as we are. I love you, Aari. I had no idea life could be this good. I will lay down everything I have and all that I am to be the man you and our baby need me to be. I promise that I will die before anything disrupts us again. What I feel for you is beyond love. I adore you in a way that is incomprehensible to me. It is what makes me know, without a doubt, that I will provide, protect and be devoted to you and our family for the rest of my life. Ariella Mason, please will you marry me?’
I drop to my knees, move the ring out of his hand to the floor, and hold my boyfriend’s hands for the last time.
‘You saved me from the fear, loneliness, insecurity and shame too, Caleb. And when the darkness, cold and confusion of the world threatens to swallow me whole, you always reach for me and fight with all you have to set me free. There is no version of the future that I want other than one with you – because your love and dedication to our baby tells me everything about what is to come. Caleb Black, I cannot wait to be your wife.’
Caleb puts the heels of his palms to his eyes and, when I manage to gently move them away, his tear-filled eyes make mine fill too. We spend the night eating and talking about our future together as I make my half glass of champagne last for as long as possible.
We decide that sleeping on the couch might be too ambitious, so we go into my old room and sleep in my bed together for the last time.
‘I’m going to miss this place.’ Caleb sighs.
‘Maybe we can visit. What’s the new owner like?’
‘No idea. Jasper’s agent has been tight-lipped.’
‘That’s disappointing. You did propose to her last night.’
The shock on Caleb’s face is hilarious.
‘Jasper has been my friend much longer than he has been yours, Caleb. That’s why I know that we’re running on financial fumes. I also know providing for us is extremely important to you.’ I stroke my belly. ‘But I have access to an uncomfortably large amount because Jasper has been playing with my salary for years. Let’s use it to build the life we want.’
‘What do you mean by uncomfortably large?’
‘We can keep the flat. Jack will have to find a flatmate or pay enough to cover the mortgage and other bits to stay, though. In addition to that, if you say yes, tomorrow we can be completely debt free. We’ll have a little bit left to invest in your business if we’re careful.’
Caleb is already shaking his head.
‘You can rebuild the studio and do what you need to provide for us, while I go on Lara’s ethically dicey adventure with her. Let me clear these debts. We’re going to have so many things to stress about in the future, I’d really like for this not to be one of them. Please.’
‘I really don’t deserve you.’
When Caleb crushes me against him for a kiss and our daughter kicks in protest, he feels it. The look on his face confirms what I already know. The rest of my life is going to revolve around this man and our family.