Chapter 52
Louhi
EIGHT MONTHS LATER
“I just want to say that this is both idiotic and beautiful in equal measure.”
I roll my eyes at Honey Eyes’s statement. Although he’s probably right.
Sean snorts, but proceeds to remove his shirt, yanking it over his head, leaving him in nothing but black tactical trousers and boots. The look is bloody hot.
Even as I take in the gorgeous man standing before me, a wave of sadness rolls through me. I wish my brother was here for this.
The hole Mercer’s absence left in my heart continues to ache, but I’ve been slowly stitching the wound closed, knowing it’ll be an internal blemish until I see him again.
I hardly remember the last nine months. I think I cried for months straight.
Then, there was the period when I wanted to kill everyone.
Sean’s been holding us—me—together like the most treasured glue.
Once I moved past the sorrow stage of grief, it was a daily battle not to go after Conall myself.
Lifting my Wildey and pulling the trigger so the bullet lodged in his brain became my greatest fantasy.
The only thing that stopped me was the promise I made to my brother.
I can’t let him down. Not even in death. It’s the last thing I can do for him.
After Mercer’s funeral, where I buried him in the same elegantly macabre Koskinen plot, I sat at the plot, staring at their headstones, wondering if our parents found Mercer in the afterlife and what their reunion might’ve looked like.
?iti would’ve wept with joy and sorrow as she threw her arms around my brother.
Is? would’ve been stone-faced, but the tremble in his hand would’ve given him away.
In some ways, I wish I could have been there. I miss them.
I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about the word family lately and what mine will look like now that my brother is gone. When I mentioned it to Sean, he said we’d build our own.
We agreed neither of us were necessarily the marrying type, so we settled on something else, something a bit more permanent. Ink fades, marriage licenses can burn, and the government can forget you even exist, but scars are forever—at least until the skin slides from our bones.
Now, Jace holds the red-hot fire poker I had made over the coals, his gloved hand twisting it around as he asks, “Do you want me to say a few words to make this official or whatever?”
I snort a laugh, but Jace charges on. “Dearly beloved, we are gathered—”
“Shut the fuck up,” I snap congenially, without any real bite. “Or I’ll burn my initials into your arse, and you’ll have to explain to every girl you fuck for the rest of your life that you’re my bitch.”
He shrugs. “I’ll make them kiss it better.”
“For fuck’s sake,” Sean grumbles before lunging for his friend. I intercede just in time, pressing my palms to his bare chest, his heart thumping beneath my hand.
Sliding my hands over his warm, tanned skin, I smile sweetly up at the man I love. Dropping my voice, I purr, “Why don’t you get on your knees for me?”
A growl rumbles in his chest as he drops to the ground.
Like his life has no value, Jace pokes the beast once more. “Need something to bite down on, big boy?”
Whipping my head around, I meet those warm caramel-colored eyes and snap, “Quit. You’re ruining the moment, Jace.”
Holding up his hands in supplication, he appears a bit sheepish as I take the poker from him, the end glowing orange and white. We invited him to be here because we couldn’t imagine doing this without him as a witness. I’m beginning to wonder if that was such a good idea.
Kneeling before me, Sean clasps his hands behind his back and flexes his jaw as he grinds his teeth in anticipation. Jace moves to stand behind Sean and grips him by the shoulders to prevent him from moving. His ample biceps and forearms bulge with the effort to stay still.
Stepping up to him, his chest rises with an intake of breath, and a gentle smile touches my lips. “I love you, Sean Diggory.”
The smell of Sean’s flesh burning permeates the air as I press the poker to his chest, over his heart. He grunts in pain when I pull the poker back and reveal a nasty, angry-looking wound, but one that sets my soul ablaze.
His breaths are ragged, but his lips tip up as he studies the bold, block letters LIK permanently stamped over his heart.
When his gaze slides to mine, the physical pain evident from a moment ago is long gone, replaced with only pride and devotion.
If my brother were here, he’d think this situation was completely absurd, but I can practically see him smiling in my mind.
When he catches his breath, he stretches to his full height and winces with the movement.
I reach for the hem of my black T-shirt, dragging it over my head before doing the same with my bra, baring myself to the room.
It’s not as though Jace hasn’t seen me naked more than a handful of times at Exile Island.
Still, Sean’s jaw tics, but I ignore that as I trade places with him, lowering myself until my knees connect with the unyielding concrete floor of Viktor’s interrogation room.
There was never a question about where we were going to do this. An interrogation room was where we fell in love, so it only seemed fitting to start our next chapter here. Thank you, Viktor, for contributing this venue.
Sean, Honey Eyes, and I spend a lot of time together, as I’m teaching them both Russian—with the help of the soap operas—and even when the sadness creeps back into my heart, I find it easier to breathe when I’m with my friends.
We started joining Viktor for his weekly dinners, and it feels good to laugh again.
After we buried my brother, the three of us moved into my cottage just outside of Moscow for a safe, fresh start.
But that only lasted about six months before I bought Jace the place next door.
He deserved to have his own space. He mentioned paying me back for it, but I told him that I’d slit his throat if he gave me a dime.
Like a brother, Jace possesses a teeny, tiny sliver of the organ that belongs to Sean, right next to Viktor.
I wish Mercer had gotten the chance to know these men better.
Sean and Jace work for Vik now, torturing the unfortunate souls that manage to find themselves in this basement.
Joining the Bratva has been an adjustment for them since the other soldiers are wary of them, but I know that with time, Digs and Jace will win them over.
At least their working conditions have vastly improved.
Things for all of us are getting easier every day.
I close my eyes, taking a deep, calming breath as I attempt to pacify my nerves.
“Do you want a strap to bite down on, Lou?” Jace quips from behind me, his beefy, warm hands landing on my shoulders, giving them an affectionate, gentle squeeze.
“What’s love without a bit of pain here and there?” I reply with my gaze trained on Sean as he lifts the other brand from the coals.
Jace’s grasp on my shoulders tightens as I thread my fingers together behind my back, jutting my chest out. The moment he’s before me, I drag my eyes up Sean’s body, my attention lingering on my initials branded onto his chest before meeting his thundercloud-colored irises.
“I love you, Louhi Koskinen,” he declares, dark shadows smoldering in his gaze as he presses the poker to my chest.
Agonizing pain as white-hot and acute as the poker itself lances through me as my flesh burns. A piercing scream snakes up my throat in response, but I don’t release it, even as my knees battle with the unyielding floor as Jace steadies me.
After what feels like an eternity, but is only a few seconds, I force myself to drag in a breath. While that hurt like bloody hell, I’d endure a lifetime of burnings and brandings if that’s what it took to be with Sean.
When I glance down, my entire soul sings as I take in the SBD imprinted on my right breast in line with my heart on the other side. While I would’ve loved to have Sean’s mark over my heart, the serpent winding around my left breast claimed that position for herself.
Sean’s calloused palm slides over my cheek, his voice full of awe as he breathes, “Incredible.”
My nipples tighten as I take in his heated, shadowy stare, and a shiver tumbles through me; my body sparking to life as a flame glows brightly in my belly.
“Well, I’m going to head out before the show I’m not allowed to see,” Jace mumbles before releasing me and making for the door, where he stops.
“Congratulations, you guys! Your ‘in case of emergency contact’ can now be easily identified,” he tosses out with a chuckle before quickly retreating as Sean chucks a hammer that was lying on the nearby table at his back, but it bounces off the now-closed door.
“Why did he have to come?” he grouses. I laugh, getting to my feet.
“Because we like him, Sean.”
“He’s alright sometimes, but I like you more.”
I scoff playfully. “I should bloody hope so.”
He smirks, but it fades into an expression sizzling with that sultry darkness that promises both pain and unimaginable pleasure as his eyes track from my face down to my chest, lightly trailing a finger around the fresh burn.
“I didn’t think it was possible for you to ever be more breathtaking than you already are, but I’ll admit that the sight of you bearing my initials is more stunning than I can begin to put into words. ”
An adoring smile spreads over my face. Suddenly desperate for the contact, I launch myself the short distance, my body colliding with his as I leap into his arms. I wrap my legs around his waist when he catches me. He backs me against the wall, my bare skin knocking against the cool concrete wall.
His tongue slides against mine, and I moan into his mouth as my tight nipples rub against his chest. Nothing has ever felt as good as losing myself in this man, just as he loses himself in me.
When we finally break apart, sincere words that I never would’ve imagined saying until I met Sean dance on my tongue. “You’re mine, Sean Diggory, forever. I love you.”
The moment he sets me on my feet, we frantically rip at each other’s waistbands as if it’s a race to see who can undress the other fastest. I kick off my boots, and he strips me in record time, but when Sean’s trousers catch on his muscular thighs, I growl in frustration.
He chuckles as he steps out of them, his thick cock bobbing.
My mouth waters, and I lick my lips, dying for a taste.
“If you’re so anxious for my cock, why aren’t you already on your knees?”
I may not know God, but I know Sean Diggory, and I’ll worship at his altar any time I can.
I hardly have time to swirl my tongue around his leaking tip, the taste of him settling before he’s thrusting forward.
Relaxing my throat, I mewl around him as he begins to fuck my face in earnest, gripping the hair at my scalp roughly.
I suck and lick as he pummels in and out of my mouth, my hands roaming over the muscled planes of his body.
He abruptly withdraws, my spit tethering us until he scoops me into his arms, dropping me on the table. I hiss in a sharp breath as my warm flesh makes contact with the chilly metal, but ignore it as I spread my legs wide in invitation.
“My gorgeous little slut, opening up for me, silently begging me to shatter you before I glue you back together again.”
I whimper in confirmation, reaching for him, but he grasps both of my wrists in one hand and pins them over my head as he leans over me, his face hovering above mine. I buck my hips, seeking friction, seeking him.
“Beg for it, Lou. Beg me to break you.” His voice is low and rough, and my body tightens in response.
“Yes…break me, Sean, please.”
“Louder, baby. I want this entire goddamn country to hear you crying out for me.”
I do as I’m told, trilling his name like a melodic prayer, imploring him to tear me apart, to make me whole again.
I’m writhing as he unexpectedly ties my wrists together and secures them to the legs of the table.
Shamelessly, I plead with him when he hooks each leg over the sides and fastens them as well.
I’m spread open for him, and the cool air of the room strikes my wet and wanting cunt as it flutters in anticipation.
Sean plunges two fingers into me before pulling them out and skillfully playing my clit like a stringed instrument. My back bows as much as my restraints will allow, and my eyes roll back into my head.
“Scream for me.”
I don’t have to wonder for long what the fuck I’ll be screaming for because the sharp sting of a blade dragging across my skin just above my clit has my piercing shriek bouncing off the walls.
Sean strokes my clit through the torture as he continues to slice into my flesh.
I thrash my head as my eyes threaten to roll into the back of my head.
My body is on fire, the adrenaline stoking the embers as he leans forward, licking the bleeding wound as he pinches my clit.
My blood is fizzing, tiny bubbles trickling through my veins as bliss swiftly envelops me. It’s an effort to lift my head, but when I do, I find my skin split in a pattern that reveals both my blood and a second set of Sean’s initials. I smile, despite the glorious discomfort.
With my next breath, he’s impaling me on his cock, seating himself in one powerful thrust. I scream as he pinches my nipples, pulling painfully on the skin around my brand, but my vision goes spotty as he pounds into me with indecent, filthy precision.
I fall apart once more, my mind empty as tears prick my eyes from the onslaught of pleasure battering my senses. Sean follows closely behind me, my name flying from his perfect mouth.
Just as he promised, Sean broke me, but on my own terms, mending me in every way imaginable.
In Sean’s darkness, I’ve found my light.