Chapter Sixteen
Rylee
“We can’t change what happened.” I look at Ezra.
“Sometimes, I still see their faces in my dreams. Not as often as I used to. When I would wake up, I crawled off the bed and huddled in here.” I ease to my knees and scoot underneath my bed.
Ezra follows, kneeling just outside of it.
“I would grab a book and read about another world to ease the memories. When I lived with Heath, he ripped out the closet when he discovered me in there. He built a comfortable room in there instead and put a lock on the inside of the door. He didn’t question my need for it, just accepted it.
We deal with pain in different ways. You channeled yours toward killing the bad guys, but you can’t kill them all. ”
“I can try.”
“I told you,” I tilt my head. “I wish you could have been there when it happened to me. You can’t save all of us.
The fact that you want to is enough. Women have been subjected to abuse since the beginning of time.
We are thought of as weak, easy targets.
I don’t hate all men. The shifters and vampires in the family prove that not all of them are bad.
There are ones out there that would never raise a hand or assault a woman.
Unfortunately, many women have seen that sometimes, the bad outweighs the good.
I can’t allow the dead men who held me captive to win.
They have been punished and are gone. I’m still here.
I’ve tried to live without their abuse being the first thing I think about when I wake up.
The family and Heath have helped. Since meeting you, I only think of you.
I dream about you. When I open my eyes, I wonder where you are, and I’m excited to see you.
I’m not saying you healed me, but you’ve given me the safety to allow thoughts of a happy future. ”
“Fuck, baby.” He circles my ankle, gripping lightly.
“You can’t know how it feels to be Issy or me.” I lean forward. “The only thing you can do for her is listen. Support her. Make it known that you will always be there for her.”
“And you?” he asks.
“You are already doing everything I need.” I swallow hard. “I want to be with you.”
“I want to mark you,” he grits out. “Are you ready for that?”
“I’m—” I know I don’t want to be without him, but I don’t think I’m ready to mark him.
“It’s alright.” He caresses my skin. “You don’t have to be. I want to be tied to you in every way. I’m ready.”
“But if you do, you can’t change your mind.” If one shifter marks their mate, but it’s not reciprocated, they will forever be bound to them. Their mate will not feel the pain as severely if the mating mark isn’t completed.
“I won’t change my mind,” he growls. “I will wait until you decide it’s time for you.”
“Ezra.” I scoot forward. “What if it takes weeks?”
“Then it does.”
“Shit,” I laugh. “I’ve never met anyone like you.”
“Good. That reassures me that you will complete the bond soon.”
“Maybe…”
“No. You have to be sure.”
“Will it hurt you?” I crawl toward him.
“No.” He grabs my hands and helps me stand.
“Would you lie to me?” I narrow my eyes.
I know the basics of mating. I’ve heard that what he is saying is possible.
When he bites me, it will be physically impossible for him to leave me without the excruciating pain of an unfulfilled bond.
With a human-shifter mating, doing this is impossible.
Once the shifter bites a human, the change into a shifter begins.
“Baby, I’ll be fine.” He smiles. “Do you trust that I would never do anything to hurt you?”
“Yes,” I say quickly.
“Wait here,” he says, and leaves the room.
Shaking out my arms, I release the tension the conversation caused.
Within a few days, I’ve bared my soul, and it’s been more freeing than difficult.
He makes it easy. There is something about him that makes people at ease, unless he’s holding a knife to your throat. I turn as he returns, and freeze.
“Mate?” I stare at the leather bindings he has gripped in his hand.
“I would never force you to be tied up. These aren’t for you,” he says, and my eyes widen, meeting his.
“What?”
“I listened to your fears.” He walks toward me. “You’ve been worried about your reaction. Using these on me will ease some of that.”
“You are going to let me bind you,” I say slowly.
“You’re shocked,” he smirks.
“Well, yeah.” I motion toward his body. “You’re a badass assassin. Won’t it go against your male-dominant thing?”
“Baby.” He chuckles. “I do like control. In my work, and my life. This is different. If I have to do this to make you feel comfortable…I will. I hope that after a few times, you’ll be alright without them. I want you to be in control this time, and be able to explore.”
“We both know that those aren’t strong enough to hold you if you wanted loose.” I step close and trail my fingers over the leather.
“Yes, but it’s the illusion. Also, if you needed to get away, it would give you enough time before I broke them.” He lifts a shoulder. “It’s up to you.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes. Will you welcome my mark?”
“I will.” Tingling starts to move through my body. I can’t say I’ve never thought about tying up a man. It’s not the same as confining a man I plan to torture.
“Hold them.” He holds the leather out, and I close my fingers around it. “What is your word?” He takes off his jacket.
“Captive,” I whisper, greedily watching him.
“Don’t hold back.” He drops to a knee and unlaces his boot.
“If you are scared, say it. I will never be angry at you.” He switches knees to work on the other boot, removing the knife strapped to the side.
“I give you free rein to do what pleases you.” He straightens and unbuttons his shirt.
“Where would you like my mark?” He shrugs the fabric off his shoulders, laying it over his jacket.
“Uh…” This is the first time I’m seeing his skin. He’s muscled, yet not overly so. There are tattoos scattered over his chest.
“Baby,” he chuckles.
“It’s up to you.” His pants are next, and I try to control my expression as they drop.
“Do you want me naked?” he asks as he slides his fingers underneath the edge of his tight boxers.
“Sure.” I motion casually and smack my arm with the bindings. I want to hit myself in the forehead, but I would probably knock myself out.
“Alright, Foxy,” he smirks, and pushes them down.
I inhale sharply. My mate is a beautiful man.
“I’ll just…” I point toward the bed and turn sharply. Fuck, what is wrong with me? I lean over the mattress and move the blankets, pushing them to the bottom of the bed. “How—” Ezra presses against my back.
“The cuffs are easy to use,” he says softly, taking them from me. “There is a long strap between them that you can attach to the headboard.”
“Okay,” I gulp, watching his hands in a daze.
“I’ll get on the bed first.” He gently moves me to the side and sits on the edge. “Cuffs.” He holds his wrists toward me.
I can’t believe this is happening. Being bound takes trust, and that’s why I’ve never wanted to do it with another man.
I attached one cuff and then the other, and try not to stare at his hard cock.
The man is hot, and seeing him sit easily, watching me, turns me on even more.
He’s attractive no matter what he is doing.
He moves to the middle of the bed, holding his arms above his head.
My heart pounds as I climb on the edge, leaning over him to clasp them to the frame.
As I finish, I look down and notice my chest is inches away from his face.
“Enjoying yourself?” I ask, and he glances up.
“Immensely.” He grins, and I shake my head, backing away.
It’s time to give him my trust and my body.
I take off my shoes, kicking them to the side.
My body is mine to reveal. It took time to love it again.
There is power in willingly undressing myself.
His focus is on me, and he can’t move. It’s my choice to leave him bound or release him.
A new confidence flows through me, and I appreciate my mate more than ever.
I reach for my zipper and slowly lower it.
He watches every move, his eyes on my hands.
Pushing the fabric over my shoulders, I let it pool around my hips.
I wiggle, and it’s around my feet. His jaw tenses.
I’m not ready to take everything off, so I step forward.
“Should you have a word?” I ask as I stop at the bottom of the bed.
“Grapes.”
“Grapes?” I laugh.
“I hate them. They are rubbery, and the skin peels off.” He cringes.
“Okay.” I bite my lip, pausing.
He waits patiently. I think of all the ways he has waited for me to be comfortable with him.
I ease on the mattress and kneel. His breathing quickens.
I’m safe. Ezra would never hurt me. I want him desperately, so I crawl toward him.
His hands clench, but he doesn’t move. His control is being tested, yet he does this for me.
My hesitance disappears. I continue up the bed and over his body. Hovering on all fours, I dip my head and kiss him gently. Pulling back, I nip his lip before dragging my mouth down. I trace the tattoo on his chest with my tongue.
“Jesus, baby,” he groans, and I smile against his skin.
Moving on, I shift my weight onto my palms and move to his stomach.
Kissing from one side to the other, his inhale urges me to be bold.
I crawl backward, dragging my hands on the sheet, I lift my legs between his, and sit on my heels.
I meet his gaze and lift my arms, unclasping my bra.
His chest rises as I throw it to the floor.
“You’re beautiful,” I rasp.
“If you think so,” he says.
“I do. It’s not just on the outside.” I hook my thumbs under the edge of my underwear. “Are you okay?” I glance at his hands.
“No,” he grits out, and I pause. “I’m fucking fantastic. There isn’t anywhere in the world I would rather be. You are stunning.”