25. Honey #2
When he flicks his eyes up to mine, he looks past me to Phoenix, and a silent message passed between them has Phoenix tugging up the sleeve of the T-shirt I’ve been given to wear.
Fox brings a black box thing, smaller than the one before, up toward my arm.
I try to stay still, but my heart hammers in my chest, and I instinctively shift away.
Fox stops what he’s doing with a low growl and then a sigh before holding the black box out over the back of his hand. A light flashes, but it doesn’t make any sound. He holds it up toward my arm again, and I close my eyes, looking away and waiting for the pain.
“It’s okay,” Evangeline says softly, “he has to narrow down the spot on your arm where the tracker is. Then he’ll decide the best way to get it out. Boys, maybe you could distract her too?”
I open my eyes, and Zephyr comes closer still. He and Fox maneuver a little table that the tray is set on, so it’s off to the side, which allows Zephyr to stand before me.
Phoenix puts his phone away, and I’m between them with their focus on me.
My impure time floods through my mind, a hazy memory of the three of us, just like this, surfacing.
A warmth blooms inside me. I’m stuck between them, but I don’t really feel stuck at all.
It’s not stifling or scary, and it’s certainly not lonely.
However, it’s not enough to distract from what Fox is doing. He moves the black thing over my arm a few times and stops in the same spot, nearly centered on the side, on each pass.
“Sweetness,” Zephyr purrs. “It’ll hurt just a little, but Fox is really good at what he does. He’ll make this as easy on you as possible.”
“Right, Fox?” Phoenix lets out a low grumble as Fox picks up an injection thing like he had the first time we were here.
He waves it gently back and forth, showing it off.
I shake my head and curl my fingers and toes. I don’t want this.
“That’ll numb the area so you won’t feel what he has to do to get it out.” Phoenix explains for me.
He kisses my neck, and I close my eyes, caught between how good it feels and how scared I am.
Zephyr leans in and pushes a kiss to my lips.
Why does sinning have to feel so good?
The conversation with Lazarus rapidly fires through my brain. Put aside the tome, the teaching of the apostles, and your own shame. If I want to survive in this world, I have to put the last years of my life aside. I am no longer with the House of Apostles.
I kiss Zephyr back, and he purrs. With the way our lips are pressed together, I feel the rumble of his purr, and it tickles.
Phoenix’s hands dig in at my hips, and he kisses the back of my neck.
Something about me is different. A tingling sensation starts in my center, and I reach for Zephyr, clinging to his leather vest.
It almost distracts me from what’s happening. But movement on my arm has me turning my head, breaking the kiss, and I see Fox raising the syringe.
“Mmmm.” I try to lean away.
Zephyr uses his thumb and forefinger to turn my head back to face him. “Eyes on me, sweetness.”
I lock eyes with Zephyr, his deep brown eyes holding me in their depth, and it’s like they could swallow me up.
“Swoon,” Evangeline sighs wistfully.
That gets a chuckle from Phoenix at my back, and I shake with his whole-body movements. He whispers in my ear, “That means you look good between us.”
Something pinches my arm, and I don’t remember how to breathe.
Fingers fist into my hair, Zephyr’s, pulling me closer. He kisses me more intensely as his tongue finds its way into my mouth. The intrusion isn’t unwelcome.
Phoenix slides his hands from the top of my hips to the inside of my thighs, drawing a gasp from my lungs. My body responds like it does anytime the twins start to touch me there, slickness threatening to leave a wet spot on the seat.
The kisses on my neck turn to nips, light pressure of teeth pulling at the skin, and Phoenix grinds against me.
A low growl sounds from the right, and I freeze, instantly aware of everything — the hands, the mouths, the teeth, and the pressure and movement of something on my arm. Others watching.
I break the kiss with Zephyr and try to control my breathing and forget it all.
With everything I have, I try to go back to a moment ago when this didn’t feel like a bad thing.
That this wasn’t necessary, scary, and wrong.
Somehow, maybe I can forget that Fox is digging underneath my skin, looking for something I didn’t even know was there.
“Don’t think too hard, sweetness.” Phoenix purrs again as his hands traipse back away from my center, fingers moving in little circles. “Ignore Fox, he’s not even here.”
But he is there, his hands doing something. My heart is beating so fast that it feels like it might run off without me.
Zephyr squeezes the hair at the back of my neck, and I wince, looking up at him. But I quickly divert my gaze out of respect.
“Look at me, Honey.” His voice holds an edge of a growl.
I raise my eyes back up to him again. Don’t be mad. Please don’t be mad.
But Zephyr doesn’t look at me with anger; it’s hunger. “Fox is almost done. You’re being so brave. After this, we’ll take you to get clothes that fit and grab some food. It’ll be amazing.”
Phoenix stops kissing and nipping my neck. A hand wraps around my bicep, and my whole body stiffens.
Zephyr lets go of my chin and looks to my arm, and it feels like permission to do the same. When I look down, Phoenix pulls his hand away, revealing a medium-sized bandage.
“It feels wrong not using our shadows to just heal her,” Phoenix grumbles. His shadow touches the edge of the bandage like it will remove it.
“Let it be.” Evangeline sighs. “Fox will double-check she doesn’t have any more before you take her off the compound property.”
Zephyr untangles his fingers from my hair and steps away from me.
Fox runs the big black thing over my arms and legs again.
After moving it across my chest, he flicks his wrist, beckoning me to stand.
He offers me a hand, helping me down off the table, and pulls me forward a step before running the black thing all around my front and back once more.
“She’s clear. But still be careful. Don’t let Xavier see you two are earning big points.” Evangeline’s voice is a little singsongy, almost mocking.
“Oh yeah, big points,” Phoenix huffs, and I look at him. He’s sliding forward on the table to climb off now that I’m not in his way. “Maybe we don’t want to play the family game.”
“Game?” I look to Zephyr for answers while wrapping my arms around myself. The arm with the bandage is heavy with tingling, yet feels sore and doesn’t want to move all that nicely.
“Long story short, our family believes in competing to earn your inheritance. Fox and our older brother Xavier are much better at competing than we are.” Zephyr offers his hand out to me.
“But it doesn’t matter because we’re never going to win, and all we want is to have a special day with our omega. ”
Our omega. Those words loop on a loudspeaker in my brain. A chill runs down my spine. Omega. That’s all I am. Or is my reaction because ‘our omega’ certainly feels better than ‘the omega’? Could that be what this is? Could I be theirs? What would that be like?
The twins promised to be better and no longer sin. We weren’t exactly sinning, but it sure felt close to it. It wouldn’t be a sin, though, if we were a pack.
I place my hand inside Zephyr’s, and he pulls gently, guiding me out of the room.
Phoenix follows, grabbing my other hand, and calls back behind us, “Thanks, Fox. Catch you later, Evangeline.”