Chapter IV
J some days I feel like I need to fight other women off.
But he only has eyes for me. Luckily. I’d have his balls otherwise.
“I love you,” I say when he hands me a mug of coffee.
Sitting on the other side of Willow, he eyes me. “You fucking better, woman.” He starts feeding Willow. “What are you girls up to today?”
I sip some coffee. “Velvet’s got the day off, so she and Harlow are meeting us for lunch. I thought I might clean out the spare room too. It’s a mess in there. Have you got a busy day on?”
He nods. “Yeah, I think so.”
“Madison,” my mother calls from the front door. She has a key and lets herself in when she comes over. Because she knows J likes to have sex all the damn time, she always announces herself when she enters.
“In the kitchen, Mum,” I call back.
She bustles in, placing her handbag down on the kitchen counter. “I need to borrow your hairdryer. Mine just blew up.”
J looks at her like she’s a crazy person. “You drove here just to dry your hair?”
I stand. “Of course she did. I would have too.”
“I’ll never fucking understand some things,” he mutters, and then to Willow, he says, “You won’t do crazy stuff like that, will you, baby girl?”
Willow loves her daddy and smiles so big it makes my heart hurt. God, I could watch these two for hours.
Mum and I head into my bathroom and while she dries her hair, I say, “You’re seeing that guy today, aren’t you? The one you met on Bumble.”
She smiles. “Yes.” She stops the hairdryer. “Do you think I look okay? Is this outfit okay?”
“You look beautiful, Mum, and this dress is gorgeous. If he doesn’t like what he sees, he’s blind.” I love watching my mum date and seeing her genuinely happy.
“I’m so nervous, Madison. It doesn’t seem right to be this nervous at my age.”
“This is good, though.”
She frowns. “How do you figure that?”
“Because it means if you two get on, there will be butterflies. And butterflies and falling in love is everything that I want for you.”
She stills, like I’ve said something important. When she speaks, her voice is full of emotion. “Thank you. That means everything to me.”
My heart squeezes with love. Mum and I don’t share many moments like this, so this feels super special. “Gah. Now I’m all choked up.”
“Me too, and I can’t ruin my make-up, so you need to go and leave me to dry my hair.”
I smile. “I’m going!”
I head back out to J and Willow. They’re finished with her breakfast and J’s put her down on her playmat while he’s cleaning up the kitchen.
I move behind him and slide my arms around him, leaning against his back, suddenly craving this closeness.
“What did I do to deserve this?” he asks, taking hold of my hands that are clasped around his chest.
“I love you, J, but you need to understand that I’m not ready to get pregnant again.” I can’t wait to discuss this tonight; I need him to know it now.
Turning, he meets my gaze. The look in his eyes tells me he’s finally paying attention to what I’m saying. To what I’ve been trying to say for weeks now. “When are you thinking?”
“I honestly don’t know. I want time with Willow to really bond with her before she has a sibling. And I want us to have time too. It’s hard to find that time with one child. Imagine how much harder it’ll be with two.”
He thinks about this for a moment and then says, “I know I’m an impatient bastard. I just need to know it will happen.”
I smile up at him. “It will definitely happen. I want lots of kids with you.”
His hands slip around my waist and rest on my ass before he brings his mouth to mine. Kissing me like it’s his job, he says, “Lots is a good fucking word.”
I know my husband well, so I know where his brain has gone. “Because it means lots of sex?”
Heat flashes in his eyes. “You remember how much sex it took us to fall pregnant with Willow?”
“I’ll never forget it, baby.”
He kisses me again. “Okay, so we’ll delay getting pregnant.”
I narrow my eyes at him. “Why was this so easy? You’ve been hardcore on wanting another child straight away.”
“I’m still hardcore on that, but I listened to you,” he says, his tone more serious than J ever gives me. “And I’m hearing what you’re saying. I agree that we need time together, and since I’m more hardcore on keeping us strong than I am about having another kid soon, we’ll delay.”
My tummy comes alive with butterflies at what he says. “I love you, Jason Reilly. You might drive me crazy some days, but you never fail to give me what I need.”
His lips brush mine again, and then he gives me the J I know and love and want to sometimes kill. “Don’t fucking think I’m pulling back on fucking you, Madison. If we only have one kid, we have all the fucking time in the world for sex.”
I roll my eyes. “Only you would think that.”
His grin as he smacks my ass and says, “Tonight, you’re mine” stays with me all day. J might do my head in at times, but God I love him and never want to do any of this without him.