Chapter 19
Juniper
Ididn’t know how debilitating seeing these two together in the same room was going to be until I couldn’t look them in the eyes as they were standing over me. Shit, if that’s what it’s going to be like between them, god fucking help me.
I’ll whither with a crook of their fingers.
All afternoon, my breath keeps hitching when I look toward their table.
They play games and sip their drinks, laughing and joking the entire time.
I haven’t been able to satiate my thirst in hours.
One of them is always looking my way, and each time I join them at the table, they give me the sexiest, most encouraging smiles.
I think my cheeks are a permanent shade of pink.
My entire body is going to be flushed later.
I nearly spill the drink I’m pouring at the thought.
It’s an hour to close when I glance over to Nick and Jax, noticing them deep in conversation about something—unlike the carefree banter they’ve shared all day.
A bewildered, annoyed expression rests on Nick’s face.
It reminds me of the way he looked the first night he walked me home, and it concerns me enough that my stomach drops.
I can’t hear what they’re saying. They’re looking out the front toward the surf, yet the only thing I see when I look that way is the crashing waves lit up by our lights.
Curiosity has me wiping my hands and walking around the end of the bar to their table. I haven’t even reached them when Nick suddenly stands.
“—careful,” I hear Jax saying.
“You know it,” Nick says.
“Where are you going?” I ask when I reach them.
That pain is back in Nick’s eyes as he pivots toward me, and more than anything, I want him to tell me what the hell is going on.
He slides his hand around my waist. “I have to take care of something.”
“I swear you two are in the mafia,” I mutter, making Nick and Jax both smile.
“Worse, love,” Jax says.
Nick shoots him a tired look and shakes his head. “I could lie to you and say I forgot something at my house, but I don’t want to lie. All I can say is that you don’t need to worry about it. I’ll be back at closing.”
I want to tell him not to go, to stay here instead of leaving again. Still, something tells me he’d just go anyway.
“You’d better. We have a date,” I remind him.
His eyes brighten a fraction at the mention. “I wouldn’t miss it. Jax is going to stay here. You’ll wait for me?”
“I will.”
His lips land on mine for the briefest second before he lets me go and makes his way to the door, his jacket undulating behind him when he exits the building.
I stare after him and rest my hip against the table. “Why does it feel like he’s hiding something?” I ask Jax.
Jax shifts as he glances at the door. “Because he is.”
My brows lift, eyes widening, though he waves me off and shakes his head.
“My brother has many secrets. I promise, it’s nothing you should fear.”
Fear.
The word has me thinking about last night, about the fireflies and the birds and the ice on the sidewalks melting beneath my feet. I stare out at the ocean like Nick was just minutes before as it all runs through my mind.
“You know, ever since I met you two, weird things have been happening around me. I’ve been blaming Marge and her Rumpus Brothers stories, but I’m starting to think it might have something to do with you two instead,” I say.
He considers me as he sits up. “What makes you think that?”
I hesitate to answer, to reveal something that might make him think I’m crazy. “You two just don’t feel real,” I eventually decide.
Jax reaches for my fingers and brings them to his lips. His touch is chilled, but not a startling chill. It’s like sinking into cool, clean sheets at the end of a hot day, the magic you feel when you step outside into the snow for the first time.
“I assure you, darling. We’re real.”
An uneven breath leaves me at the way he stares.
I slide onto the edge of the table at his side, goosebumps rising on my skin when his fingers gently move to my thigh.
He’s touching me so delicately… as if he’s afraid that if he goes too far, he won’t be able to stop himself from consuming me entirely.
It almost makes me smile. Someone so obviously used to creating disruption, restraining himself like he’s never had to do it before.
“So, you’re the moon,” I say.
He squints up at me. “What does that mean?”
“Nick was telling me the other day that he loved the sun. That the moon meant chaos. Now, meeting you, I assume he means you.”
Jax smiles fondly. “You think I’m chaotic?”
“I think you’re used to doing whatever the fuck you want to do,” I reply.
He huffs. “I never liked being caged. It made me… restless. Limitations fucked with my head and caused me to make mistakes.”
He sounds like he’s talking about more than simple pranks and mischief.
“There’s that humility,” I tease him.
Jax laughs, his thumb running over the hem of my skirt. “Why do you like the parade so much?”
I look around the bar once to make sure none of my tables need me before settling into the conversation. “Ah… I don’t know. I guess the lights,” I answer with a shrug. “I love the lights. They make me happy.”
“What else makes you happy?” he asks.
“I don’t… I’ve never thought about it. I guess my dog. My cat. My home—I’m really comfortable at home. It has all of my favorite things.”
“Being alone?” he asks.
I contemplate his question. “Yeah,” I decide.
“Yeah, I’ve spent a long time learning to love myself.
Learning to be the person I can count on instead of folding to the pressure that I should need someone in my life to be whole.
I used to think being enough of a person meant bending to become the person they wanted me to be.
That I should make myself less just for a partner. ”
“And now?”
“Now I say fuck that. And since making that decision, it feels like a weight is off my chest. No more feeling like I need to be watered down.”
“Watered down Juniper doesn’t sound as fun,” he says, smiling.
“She’s super boring,” I agree, returning his smile. “She used to fold like a shitty napkin. Ripped edges and torn middles as she tried to become his favorite origami. Now, I consider myself a fitted sheet.”
Jax chuckles. “Not the fitted sheet,” he jokes.
I laugh alongside him. “I love it. It helps weed out the ones who aren’t willing to work through their frustration,” I say, grinning.
He sits up in his chair, fingers gliding higher on my thigh. “You’re worth every ounce of frustration, darling. Anyone who thinks differently doesn’t deserve to breathe the same air as you.”
My tongue darts out over my lips at the sentence. “Why does that sound like a promise you’re itching to fulfill?”
“Which part?”
“Making sure I don’t have to deal with someone who doesn’t deserve to breathe the same air as me.”
Another low laugh leaves him before he glances around the room again. “How long until you kick these people out?”
I notice the way he avoids the question. “A few minutes. Why? Are you getting restless?”
“I’m always restless with you,” he replies. He taps his phone twice, eyes scanning over a message on the screen. “Nick says he’s taking the car back so it won’t be sitting in the lot overnight.”
“Wow, you two just invited yourselves over, didn’t you?” I tease him.
He huffs his mirth. “Darling, we’re never leaving.”
I don’t know why my next breath is so ragged.
These two are going to make me pass out before they touch me. I can hardly breathe around them now. With both of them surrounding me, I…
My entire body heats, thighs clenching.
Jax’s eyes narrow over me. “What are you thinking about?” he asks, voice low.
I exhale nervously. “Am I that obvious?”
His delight reaches his eyes. “And just how is that pretty little cunt, love?” he asks, and I hollow at the sound of his gravelly rasp.
Our eyes lock. He already knows the answer, he’s just waiting for permission.
“Maybe you can find out before Nick gets back,” I answer.
I step away from the table without waiting on his response, and for the remainder of the time I have customers in the bar, I avoid looking at him.
I’m as pent up as I was with Nick watching me close the other night. I quietly do my closing duties as my patrons finish up, even spot sweeping beneath some tables so that once the last group leaves, all I need to do is close the till, put the chairs up, and mop.
Though, when I finally look at Jax still sitting so patiently in the corner, I make a split-second decision.
I count the till fast and turn the cameras off after putting away the deposit.
Jax is putting the final set of chairs atop the tables when I come out of the back.
“Take off your pants,” I say, striding across the room in his direction.
His brows lift. “Come again?” he asks as his eyes dart to the camera.
I reach him and pull him down to my lips. Our mouths crash against one another, hungry and fierce. He squeezes my waist, hips flush to mine.
“I said get off your pants,” I breathlessly repeat.
His lip curls. “Cameras off. Minx. I thought you were sore.”
“Fuck me before I change my mind.”
He grins. “Don’t let go, darling.”
Jax kisses me hard enough that I slip off-balance. He grabs me by my throat, my ass. I gasp at the grip, body sinking into his intensity. It’s relentless and hurried. He’s devouring me like he might never get the chance to again.
I hold onto his neck as I feel him bend me backwards. My back arches. His mouth is on my throat, my jaw. I can’t tell where he’s going next. All I can do is hold on and let him take control like he’s been wanting to the last twenty-four hours, and I fucking love it.
I’ve unleashed him.