Chapter 27
Elisabeth~
I watched as Lazarus raised his sword, then went after the four Dominions that surrounded me.
Credit to him, Eligos was engaged in the battle on the other side of the chasm, but he had to be.
With Michael leading the charge, Hell needed its strongest to hold him back, something that was futile to say the least.
Dominions also weren’t that strong, but Lazarus didn’t know that.
In Heaven, their counterparts were responsible for overseeing the duties dolled out to the lower-level angels, but in Hell, they oversaw all demonic legions, which was why they were here.
For the lack of a better analogy, they were like coaches, their teams always in the finals.
I was also bound, something that Lazarus couldn’t see from where he was fighting, but I was hoping that he was smart enough to realize that something was up.
He had to know that I’d never leave him on his own if I could help it.
As soon as Eligos had snatched me from the other side of the chasm, I’d been shrouded in darkness, and it hadn’t been until my feet had landed in this spot that I’d been able to witness the wreckage happening across from me.
It was also then that I’d noticed that I’d been bound somehow.
Looking at me, I wasn’t tied to a chair, a post, or anything like that.
I was simply standing still, surrounded by evil, my limbs immobile, rendering me powerless, and I didn’t know why.
While Ramiel had mentioned that I could die, he hadn’t said anything about being trapped in a useless state, and if I got out of this alive, then we were going to have a conversation about that.
Of course, torture came in many different versions, and I could honestly say that watching Lazarus kill a demon-only to have another immediately take its place-was definitely a form of torture.
Even if we’d been on a different plain of existence, souls got tired, too.
They became weary, exhausted, disenchanted, and anything else that you could name under the sun.
Just ask the single mother.
There was also the bleeding that was concerning.
While it didn’t seem as if they’d done any real damage, when I’d been cut, it’d been deep enough to keep a steady stream of crimson flowing down my chest, and bleeding out was bleeding out, no matter how fast or slow.
Yeah, on earth, my wound would eventually coagulate, but I had no idea what the rules were here.
Luckily, I wasn’t feeling lightheaded or anything like that yet.
I wasn’t sure how long I watched Lazarus lose the fight, but I knew that he wasn’t going to be able to keep this up for much longer.
The entire battle was a push and pull that would never end if I didn’t do something about it, I just didn’t know what.
When Ramiel had divulged our destinies, I hadn’t imagined this.
Instead, I had pictured me fighting right alongside Lazarus and everyone else.
I had envisioned myself a sort of Joan of Arc, leading the troops to victory.
I hadn’t ever suspected that I’d be rendered useless during the fight, and now I needed to find a way out of this.
Just then, that voice spoke to me again, saying, “Remember why you are here. Remember who you are and what you represent, Elisheva. Remember everything that you know.”
As sure as I knew my own name, I knew that it was God talking to me.
I knew that it was Him talking to me because that wave of peace was flowing through my body again, and everything around me turned inconsequential.
When Eligos had taken me, I’d made the mistake of letting Lazarus and the fight distract me again, and that had probably been their plan all along.
So, closing my eyes, deafening my ears, and pushing back all my other senses, I reached deep inside my soul for the key to winning this.
I searched my heart for the gateway that needed to be closed because that was the answer; that was the answer to everything.
They wanted to possess the gateway, and there was only one way to make sure that they never got what they’d come here for.
When I opened my eyes, I was no longer being held hostage by evil.
I was also no longer in the thick of a massive battle for humanity.
Instead, I was standing before an altar, angels on one side, demons on the other.
My steady breathing was the only thing that could be heard, and that was significant somehow.
Maybe it was because I was the only thing that was alive here, but whatever the reason, it mattered that I was human right now.
Then it hit me.
As long as I was alive, the gateway would always be open, so there was only one way to make sure that it was closed for good.
While suicide was a sin, I wasn’t sure if this fell under that category.
Yes, suicide was the ultimate betrayal of what God had bestowed upon us, but this wouldn’t be suicide.
It’d be a sacrifice.
Suddenly, I felt like Abraham when God had instructed him to deliver Isaac as the ultimate test of his faith. His belief in God had demanded that he obey, and in the end, God’s test for Abraham had been met with success, Abraham sacrificing a ram instead.
Tears sprang to my eyes as the full picture finally emerged before me.
Lazarus and the others hadn’t been sent to protect me as Ramiel had suggested.
They’d been sent to protect this moment.
They’d been sent to keep me safe, so that I could reach this conclusion on my own.
The demons had also rendered me immobile because they’d known that I would fight, possibly getting myself killed, possibly damaging my soul in the process. The demons had been protecting me, too.
I stepped to the altar, and that’s when I saw a rather large dagger sitting atop.
It glowed a little, making it appear fake, but I knew better.
I also understood why Ramiel had kept this information to himself.
Had he told me the truth about how I was destined to save humanity, I might have balked, and even if I’d hadn’t, Lazarus never would have been onboard for something like this.
While Lazarus was coming around, until recently, he hadn’t been a true believer.
At least, not in the way that God had needed him to be for this moment.
Everything around me was deathly still as I reached for the dagger, and as soon as my hand touched the handle, white smoke rose from my fingers, and the burning sensation was enough to make me cry out.
This wasn’t going to be painless, though I had no reason why I had believed that it would.
Maybe because everything still felt a bit surreal, I wasn’t sure.
All I knew was that I’d never felt more human than I did in this moment.
I was fragile.
I was weak.
I was flawed.
I was undeserving.
In Matthew 5:3-11, he gave nine proclamations, and out of those nine, there were two that I felt to my bones as the dagger burned my skin.
His fourth proclamation was blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth, and his sixth proclamation was blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.
Right now, being humbled the way that I was, I understood now why the meek were going to inherit the earth, and it made sense why they would.
However, while I hadn’t seen God yet, I’d heard Him twice already, and so that could only mean one thing.
For whatever reason, God saw my heart as pure, and tears streamed down my face because I was unworthy of such a gift.
In fact, we all were. No human on this earth deserved what had been promised, and it was up to me to show God that we could still be redeemed.
The scent of burning flesh hit my nose as my fingers curled around the handle of the dagger, but I couldn’t see, think, or feel beyond my purpose here. All I could feel was God seeing inside my heart, hoping that I didn’t let Him down like so many others, and the tears came harder.
This was also beyond receiving the Holy Spirit during prayer. This wasn’t like being born again, all of your sins washed away. This was a love unlike any human could handle, and now I understood why He wanted this from us willingly.
With the dagger in my hand, I stepped back from the altar, good and evil waiting on either side of me with bated breath.
Hell wanted me to save myself, and Heaven wanted me to save everyone else, and God wanted me to do both.
God wanted me to pierce this dagger through my heart, trusting that He’d be with me as I did.
Ignoring both sides, I wrapped my left hand around my right one, holding the dagger as tightly as I could, and I briefly wondered what would happen if I missed my heart. Granted, I knew that I wouldn’t, but the thought still crossed my mind, exposing all my flaws.
In the deathly silence of wherever this place was, my heart began to drum painfully in my chest, almost as if guiding me. Blood also began to rush through my ears, my human body’s biological functions reminding me that this was real, and not some incredible dream or horrible nightmare.
With my last thought being of Lazarus, I plunged the dagger into my chest, hitting my heart like a perfectly choreographed dance, the burning sensation blooming into a raging fire throughout my bloodstream, the pain unlike anything that I’d ever felt before.
I immediately fell to the ground, but it made no sense that I wasn’t dead yet. A shot to the heart or head was supposed to mean instant death, but that’s not what was happening. Instead, my body was convulsing, blood splattering all around me as I tried to breathe, the burning making it impossible.
Then, nothing.