Chapter 31
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Grace
The pub was loud and bustling, the perfect place to disappear.
Ever since that ridiculous letter had arrived last week, I’d been seeking refuge in crowds.
Not only did they give me cover; they gave me a sense of security.
I no longer felt comfortable being alone.
I could barely take ten steps on the street without glancing warily over my shoulder.
And whenever I crossed a road, I was extra careful to avoid getting hit by a car.
I’d even stopped listening to music when I was out and about so I could stay alert to my surroundings.
I wasn’t sure how serious the threat was or who exactly was behind it.
But dropping Amy’s case was out of the question.
I wouldn’t let that arsehole win, and I refused to be intimidated.
I bought some drinks for Rose, Kate, and myself at the bar and ordered snacks, since I hadn’t had dinner yet.
Kate asked how things were going at the hotel, and I told her about the most recent resignations, which prompted Rose to complain that Matthieu would probably be leaving soon as well.
He was still behaving strangely and taking suspicious phone calls.
I tried to reassure her. After all, she’d been worried about it happening for weeks, but it hadn’t so far.
Besides, everyone at the hotel was behaving strangely at the moment.
Kate told us about her work and the film she’d watched last night with Henry. As she explained the plot in exacting detail, my phone buzzed. I pulled it out of my pocket and saw that I had a new message from Ethan. It was a photo of his TV, showing Sk8 the Infinity.
I couldn’t help but grin. Ever since he’d confided in me about his dad, we had grown even closer.
Not a day went by without us seeing each other or at least messaging, and not just about the investigation.
Ethan had told me about his time at boarding school, and we had also spoken about Logan and Henry.
In return, I had shared more about my own life and family.
Especially about Amy. I missed her so much it hurt, and some days the feeling that she might return from a long holiday at any moment lingered.
Realising that wasn’t the case hurt anew every time.
But as long as I had Ethan by my side, the pain felt somehow more bearable.
“Who’s messaged you?” Kate asked, leaning in curiously.
Rose and Kate had both noticed my grin and paused their conversation. But while Kate looked intrigued, Rose pursed her lips disapprovingly, as if she already knew the answer.
“Ethan,” I admitted. I wasn’t going to lie.
“So he’s still not out of the picture?” Rose asked.
“No. To be honest, he’s very much in the picture.”
She frowned. “What do you mean?”
“We’ve been seeing each other a lot,” I confessed. I didn’t know exactly what Ethan and I were, but it was definitely more than a casual fling.
Rose’s eyes widened. “You’ve got to be kidding.”
My first instinct was to apologise, but the truth was, I didn’t feel sorry.
Not in the slightest. I had been endlessly grateful to Ethan over the past weeks, and I wouldn’t deny it.
“If you knew Ethan, you’d understand. Perhaps the three—or four—of us can do something together.
The five of us, if Henry wants to join too. ”
“Oh, sign me up!” Rose said sarcastically. “And while we’re at it, why not invite Richard too? That would really make for a cracking evening.”
“You’re not being fair,” Kate interjected.
“You know Kate and I can’t stand Mr. Darlington either,” I added, though that was a total understatement.
I hated him, and Kate’s own disdain for Richard had only grown since she’d got together with Henry.
“Henry and Ethan aren’t like him. Do you really think the two of us would fall in love with tyrants? ”
Rose froze. “You’re in love with Ethan?”
“Would it make a difference if I were?” I asked evasively.
She stared at me, her expression a mixture of anger, despair, and disbelief. “Why him, of all people?”
“Because he’s a good person.”
“You were still calling him Beelzebub a few weeks ago.”
“He’s still Beelzebub—but in a sexy, likeable way.
Like Tom Ellis in Lucifer,” I explained, trying to lighten the mood by bringing up one of our favourite TV shows.
But my reference didn’t soften Rose’s bitter expression.
I sighed. “I don’t know what you want me to say, Rose.
I like Ethan. And I wish you could be happy for me.
I didn’t choose him to hurt you, but because I feel better when I’m with him.
You can hate his dad—I hate him too—but Ethan isn’t like his father.
And you don’t even have to like Ethan. It would be enough if you accepted him. For me.”
Rose didn’t speak, but her silence spoke volumes.
I felt a sharp pang. Shit, I couldn’t lose Rose over Ethan. She was my best friend, even if she wasn’t acting like it right now. But at the thought of letting Ethan go, a weight settled on my chest, making it hard to breathe.
“Rose . . .” I reached out to her. “Please.”
She didn’t move.
“Ethan is good for Grace,” Kate said, stubbornly meeting the withering look Rose shot her.
“Come on, it’s the truth. You saw for yourself how she was at the start of the year.
She didn’t smile once in the two months after Amy’s death, and you saw just now how happy she was when Ethan messaged her, how she grinned at her phone because of him. That’s a good thing.”
Rose’s eyes darted between Kate and me, her sombre expression remaining unchanged and so dark that even her usually radiant green eyes seemed dull. She pushed back her chair and stood up suddenly, grabbing her handbag from the back of the chair. “I can’t do this right now.”
“Rose . . .” I pleaded. Her words made my throat constrict. I reached out to her again, but she stepped back before I could touch her.
“I need some time to think.”
I let my arm fall. “OK.”
Wordlessly, Rose turned away from us and pushed through the crowd towards the exit. I wanted to follow her, but I knew it would have been the wrong thing to do in that moment. As much as I wanted to, I couldn’t force her to accept Ethan. She had to get there by herself—or not at all.
Kate and I stayed in the pub for a while longer, but our mood had plummeted.
We continued to chat, yet neither of us dared to bring up what had just happened with Rose.
Things only started to feel lighter when a group of students challenged us to a game of pool.
They were drunk, and Kate and I won easily.
We turned down a rematch and decided to go home, no longer in a festive mood.
We were going in different directions, so we said our goodbyes at the door.
There were still plenty of people outside the pub, but the further I walked, the quieter the streets became.
That uneasy feeling that had been dogging me since receiving the threatening letter grew stronger, but I forced myself to stay calm.
It had been over a week, after all, and nothing had happened so far.
Someone was probably just trying to scare me.
Still, I quickened my pace just to be on the safe side.
Suddenly, I heard footsteps behind me.
I glanced over my shoulder and saw a tall man in dark clothes. My muscles tensed, and I looked around for a group of people I could join for a few minutes, but there was no one in sight. Fuck!
I sped up again, and so did the man. Or was I just imagining it? My heart was pounding, and I regretted not having walked with Kate. Finally, I saw the Tube sign, but I didn’t want to go down while someone was following me.
Not sure what to do, I spotted a restaurant with the lights still on. The staff were closing up, but I didn’t care. I slipped inside and held my breath. The man walked past the restaurant, but I couldn’t see his face. Who was he?
“Sorry, we’re about to close,” one of the waitresses said.
“Can I just sit for a bit?”
She shrugged. “Fine. Ten minutes.”
I sank into a seat at the back of the restaurant, hidden from the street. What now? It wouldn’t feel safe to go back out there. Just because the guy hadn’t followed me into the restaurant didn’t mean he wasn’t lurking somewhere in the shadows, waiting for me.
Without thinking, I grabbed my phone and called Ethan.
He answered immediately. “Hey.”
I gave a sigh of relief. “Hi.”
“Is everything all right?”
“No, I . . .” All at once, I felt ridiculous. Nothing had happened. A man had walked behind me, and I’d reacted as if Michael Myers himself was chasing me. This letter was messing with my head. “Forget it. Everything’s fine. Sorry for bothering you. Have a good evening,” I said and hung up quickly.
Ethan had better things to do on a Friday night than pick me up and drive me home just because I was paranoid. I would wait until the restaurant closed and then leave with the last remaining diners. Surely I wouldn’t be the only person heading to the Tube.
My phone rang again. It was Ethan.
I declined his call, embarrassed by the whole situation, but he didn’t give up. Three seconds later, he called again.
I gave in and answered.
“What’s going on?” Ethan asked, without a greeting.
“Nothing.”
“It must be something if you’re calling.” From his tone, it was clear he wouldn’t accept my excuses.
“I was with Rose and Kate at the pub. I was heading home just now when this guy started following me, and . . . I don’t know, I just didn’t feel safe.”
Ethan swore under his breath. “Where are you now?”
“In a restaurant,” I replied, scanning around for the name of the place. I spotted it on a menu lying on the table and told him.
“Stay where you are. I’ll be right there.”
He hung up without another word. I was glad. My mind would probably have convinced me to try to stop him from coming, though my heart wanted nothing more.