Chapter 43
You had sex in my dad’s study? Seriously?!
Message from James to Ethan
Ethan
There was only one feeling in the world better than falling asleep with Grace by my side, and that was waking up next to her.
Her head rested on my shoulder, and her hand lay against my chest. Strands of her blond hair tickled my cheek softly.
My heart felt as though it might explode with happiness.
I’m falling in love with you too.
I’d never heard more beautiful words in my life. I wished I’d recorded them so that I could play them back again and again, preserving that perfect moment for the rest of my days.
Grace stirred beside me. She always gave a little sigh when her mind wanted to linger in her dreams a little longer as she woke.
I, on the other hand, had no desire to sleep any longer.
With Grace beside me, I was already living my dream.
There was a reason why I called her Dreamgirl.
She was perfect for me. Kind and caring, determined and strong-willed.
I could trust her completely, and she didn’t hesitate to open up to me either.
Not to mention that the sex with her was out of this world.
Being with Grace sent me to heights I hadn’t known existed, and it felt like flying.
“Good morning,” Grace mumbled when she was finally fully awake.
I kissed her forehead. “Sleep well?”
She nodded and cuddled up closer. “You?”
“Better than ever,” I said, stroking her back.
She looked up at me, her eyes still hazy with sleep. “Yesterday was really nice.”
“It was. And do you know what the best part is?” I asked.
She shook her head.
“We can do it again. Every day and every night. No one can stop us.”
Grace laughed. “That does sound good. But I have to go home now and then.”
I bit back the ridiculous urge to suggest she move in with me.
Or, better yet, that we find somewhere together, away from the hotel.
She wanted to leave her parents’ place, and I wanted out of The Darlington.
It would be perfect. But it was far too soon.
We were only just getting started. I had to talk to my mum about us, and Grace would have to tell her parents.
I’d have to win Rose over as well. The last thing I wanted was to come between the two of them.
“Maybe I’ll just spend weekends here from now on?” Grace suggested. “I could come straight from work on Fridays and stay until Monday. We would have three nights together. I often have to work weekends, but it’d be quite convenient. I could sleep in later.”
“Sounds good. But just for the record, we don’t always have to hang out here. We can also spend time at yours sometimes.” I wanted to meet Grace’s parents, to get a sense of what they were like. And I was curious to see how she lived. I knew the address in Shadwell, but I’d never been inside.
“No, it’s nicer here, and we have more space,” Grace said, climbing on top of me. “And anyway,” she added, her voice suggestively low, “we don’t have to be quiet here.”
“That’s a major advantage.”
“Isn’t it?” She grinned, grinding her hips against me. I moaned, instantly hard. That was another thing I loved about Grace. She knew exactly what she wanted, and she wasn’t afraid to take it.
I wrapped my arms around her waist and kissed her.
She kissed me back, and it wasn’t long before one thing led to another.
We made love. Then we fucked. Then we made love again.
It was an intoxicating mix of wild, unrestrained desire and intimate tenderness.
Both were perfect in their own way, because Grace was perfect.
After we had exhausted ourselves, we showered together and ordered a late breakfast. We ate in bed as we watched two episodes of an anime.
I wasn’t as keen on it as Grace was—it was all a bit too bright and over the top for me, and the subtitles annoyed me—but seeing her happy made up for it, so I didn’t let my lack of enthusiasm show.
Around midday, Grace decided to go home.
She wanted to tell her family about us before our relationship leaked to the media, which would happen sooner or later now that we had made our public debut.
I offered to go with her and have the conversation together, but she wanted to talk to them on her own first, especially considering the unflattering stories she’d told them about me in the past. She also turned down my offer to arrange a driver, insisting on taking the Tube instead. It would probably be faster anyway.
Once she’d gone, I checked my phone, which I’d ignored all morning.
I wasn’t surprised to see several messages from James and the others about the staged blowjob in Claude’s study.
It didn’t surprise me that they’d heard about it.
I ignored most of them, replying only to James.
I briefly considered calling him and telling him the truth, not just about the faked oral sex, but about everything else as well.
He’d find out what his dad had done eventually, anyway.
I dismissed the idea, partly out of cowardice and partly because of the fact that although the evidence Grace and I had found was suspicious and illegal, it wasn’t concrete proof of Claude’s involvement in Amy’s accident.
I sent Edgar an email and attached the photo of the illegal transfer from December so he could find out where the money had gone. I didn’t share the photos of previous transactions. They weren’t a priority, because they were unconnected to Amy’s death.
Next, I asked Kate, who’d spent the night at Henry’s, for Rose’s number.
I wrote Rose a long message, explaining my feelings for Grace and, more importantly, distancing myself from my dad.
I told her about my childhood and what it had been like growing up with Richard Darlington as my dad.
I gave her a short, very watered-down version of the harsh reality, but I hoped it would still be enough to make her see just how much I hated the man.
Putting all of that into words for someone I barely knew took courage.
I desperately hoped Rose wouldn’t take advantage of the trust I was placing in her by selling the story to the press.
But for Grace’s sake, I wanted Rose to at least accept me.
After reading over the message twice, I hit send.
I had no idea whether Rose would actually read it or block my number on the spot.
I had just sent the message when the next challenge knocked at my door. I wasn’t surprised to see my mum, not after how I’d left her yesterday. I’d actually expected her to show up much sooner, but one look at her face told me why she hadn’t turned up hours ago. She looked exhausted and hungover.
“Can I come in?” she asked, her voice dull.
“Of course.” My door was always open to her, even when we didn’t see eye to eye.
I stepped aside and let her into the flat. She immediately noticed Grace’s gold dress lying over one of the armchairs, where she had left it so she wouldn’t have to take it with her on the grimy Tube.
“Is she still here?”
“No, Grace went home.”
My mum looked relieved. She sat on the sofa while I made tea.
Five minutes later, I handed her a steaming mug and took a seat beside her.
Her shoulders were tense, her eyes filled to the brim with worry.
I waited for her to say something, to cast the first stone and get the unavoidable conversation started, but she stayed silent. So I took matters into my own hands.
“I’m in love with Grace.”
Her muscles tensed even further. She gripped her mug as though it were the ripcord of a parachute. “Ethan . . .”
“Please listen to me, Mum,” I cut in. I needed to tell her what was on my mind before she could unleash her criticism.
“I know you. And I know that you mean well, in your own way. You want to protect me from the headlines and your friends’ gossip, but you don’t have to do that.
I don’t need your protection. Not when it comes to this.
” I didn’t need to be more specific. She knew exactly what I was talking about.
“I’ve grown up, and I’m happy with Grace.
People I barely know saying nasty things won’t change that.
But what will change is our relationship if you can’t accept Grace.
You’re my mum, but if you force me to choose between Grace and you, there will be consequences.
” I would never turn my back on her, not after everything she’d done for me, but if we fought over Grace every time we met, things between us would have to change.
“I don’t want to judge Miss Claymore . .
. Grace, despite the things I found out last night,” my mum said, her lips tightening disapprovingly at her last words.
“And I believe you when you say you’re happy with her.
But that won’t last, darling. How would it work in the long term?
She might not be quite as uncultured as your brother’s girlfriend, but the two of you lead completely different lives.
And over time, those two realities will only drift further apart.
You might not see that now, but trust me.
You need a partner who understands not just you but your whole world.
Because when you break up, which you will, all that will be left are the headlines she’s generated.
You’ll never be rid of them. You’ll always be the man who fraternises with the hotel staff. ”
“What’s so bad about that?”
She sighed in frustration. “I was afraid you wouldn’t understand.”
I took my mum’s mug from her hands and set it aside, then entwined her fingers with mine.
I looked her straight in the eyes. “No, Mum. You don’t understand.
Grace is a good person. I can rely on her, and she can rely on me.
You’re right, maybe we won’t be together forever.
It’s too early to tell. But I will never regret what we have right now. ”
My mum opened her mouth to reply, but I cut in before she could speak.
“Anyway, it’s pretty hypocritical of you to worry about Grace harming my reputation while you’re still with Dad. Your image—the whole hotel’s image—has suffered far more because of him and what he’s done than anything Grace and I could ever do.”
She shook her head. “That’s different.”
“You’ve said that before. But you’re only lying to yourself. You can leave him anytime. You don’t need him. You have enough money of your own. You have friends. And you’ve got me and Henry. That is, if you’re ready to accept the women we love.”
My mum swallowed hard. “It wouldn’t look good in court if I left your dad now.”
“So what?” I snapped. I was getting angry.
I was tired of always holding my tongue to avoid hurting her feelings, while she was constantly breaking her own heart by staying with my dad.
“It would only look bad for him, not for you. Any sane person would understand why you were leaving him. He was the one who forced all those women into sex, not you. And he’s the one who cheated on you repeatedly, not the other way around. ”
At my last words, something I couldn’t quite read flickered in my mum’s eyes.
She shook her head and let go of my hands.
“I can’t just abandon your dad. He’s lost so much already.
You and Henry. The hotel. Some of his closest friends want nothing to do with him anymore.
He didn’t even get an invitation to Natalia’s birthday party.
Do you have any idea how that makes him feel? ”
“Miserable, I hope,” I replied honestly.
I would never raise a hand against him again, but that didn’t mean I had to be nice.
“Dad has made this world a worse place for a lot of people, including you and me. He doesn’t deserve you or your loyalty, and I’m sick of pretending that it’s not completely fucked up that you still stand by him after everything he’s done. ”
I refrained from saying that she should have left him years ago, as soon as she’d found out he was hitting me. But holding the past against her wouldn’t change anything about the present.
The room fell silent. Eerily silent.
I stared at my mum. She stared back at me.
The worry I’d seen in her eyes had turned into disappointment.
Not towards my dad, but towards me. My rage evaporated.
I couldn’t stay angry at someone I pitied so much.
It was a mystery to me how my dad had managed to brainwash her like this, and it broke my heart.
But at the same time, it didn’t really surprise me.
He was a manipulative bastard, and she had been under his influence for over thirty years.
“I’m not here to discuss your father with you,” she said.
“And I’m not going to discuss Grace with you.” I had said everything there was to say. Either she wrapped her head around it and chose to understand me, or she didn’t. It was out of my hands.
My mum stood up. “I suppose that’s it, then.”
Her eyes had a glassy sheen to them. I hated being the trigger for her pain, even if I wasn’t the true cause of it. But I refused to sacrifice my own happiness to minimise suffering I wasn’t to blame for. “Looks that way.”
“In that case, I wish you a good day.” Her voice wobbled, but she kept her chin lifted bravely as she fought back tears.
A heavy weight settled on my chest. I felt a strong urge to pull her into my arms and comfort her, as I had done so often lately, but I didn’t give in to the impulse.
I had to stay strong. For Grace. For myself.
For us. And for the chance that my mum might one day realise she was ruining her life for a man who didn’t appreciate her.