Chapter 16 #3
“Disgusted by you? What? No.” Her eyes found mine right as a slow smile spread across her face.
“I mean, not because of this, anyway.” Some of my tension began to ease, and my heart rate stabilized as much as it could when I was around Ever.
“Loche, you’re not a murderer, you’re a survivor.
And a hero. You saved your mother’s life. ”
My legs suddenly felt gelatinous, threatening to collapse at any moment. “You’re the first person who has ever called me that.”
“Evil like that deserves to be extinguished. It was the right thing to do. I just wish I would have been brave enough to do it, too.”
This was the first time Ever had so much as hinted to me at having a dark past. I knew about it, of course.
Eavesdropping on conversations. Simple online searches under the name of her ex provided clues to the living hell she’d been through.
But the fact that she was telling me herself? Fuck, this was huge.
“What happened, if you don’t mind me asking?” I asked her, noticing her eyes already had a faraway look in them.
“I don’t mind. I just don’t like to talk about it much, but since you trusted me enough with your secret, the least I can do is let you in on one of mine.
“This isn’t a quid pro quo scenario. You don’t have to tell me anything.”
She looked up at me. “I know, but maybe it will make me feel better to talk about it with someone before it festers inside me any longer.”
I held out my arms, miming my desire to bring her back into me as a gust of wind tore through our bodies, sucking the air from Ever’s lungs. She nodded her consent, and I pulled her in closer to me.
“Like I said inside, my sperm donor took off and ditched my mom when I was young, leaving her to fend for herself with no job and a kid to take care of. This led to her clinging to the first man she could find to take on her and her baggage, only to scramble to find his replacement when he bailed. She’d stay with them for as long as she could, trying to keep a roof over both of our heads while depression took hold, causing her to medicate herself with alcohol and opioids.
I think that’s why I adhered to Travis when he came into the picture. ”
I raged internally upon hearing the name of the man whose mugshot I’d studied, imagining all the ways I would rearrange his smug face if I ever saw him in person.
“At first, Travis seemed like a good guy, but I think that was just because I was used to the shitbags my mother shacked up with. So, when a guy was somewhat nice to me, I put him on a pedestal. It also didn’t help that Travis’s parents are loaded.
He was my survival. A way out of poverty and to be seen as someone special for once. ”
“And I’m sure he love-bombed you just so he could control you.”
Ever nodded. “I overlooked so much with him. Because he wasn’t overtly like the men my mom brought home, I didn’t see his flaws.
I thought he loved me. I ignored the passive-aggressive remarks he made, the subtle jabs at my looks and intelligence.
The petty crimes he committed. At first, it was shoplifting packs of gum and other small items, and then it escalated.
He conditioned me to accept what he was doing and threatened to silence me if I opposed him in any way.
That’s why, when he and a few of his friends found a way to hack into banking systems and steal money from people’s accounts, I didn’t immediately tell anyone.
But eventually my conscience wore thin, and I ended up contacting banks I knew Travis and his friends had hit virtually, quietly working with law enforcement behind the scenes. ”
“And then it all went to hell,” I added.
“And then it all went to hell.” Ever agreed.
“Travis found out he was being investigated, quickly putting two and two together that it was me who tipped the cops off. He tracked me down, kidnapped me, threw me into the trunk of his car, and drove us to a secluded area, where he proceeded to do everything and anything he wanted to me for thirty-three hours, twenty-two minutes. Every second of it has been carved into my psyche. I still carry the mental and physical scars. Cigarette burns on my inner thighs, small cuts from Travis’s pocketknife breaking my skin just enough for each cut to set my skin aflame. ”
Ever tried to remain strong, but I noticed the quiver in her lip as memories from that terrible night came rushing back to her.
Tears welled in her eyes, and I couldn’t stop myself from pulling her in closer to me, stroking her hair while her body trembled slightly in my arms. “He can’t hurt you anymore,” I whispered.
“Oh, but he can. He only got five years because they dropped the kidnapping charges after his high-priced defense attorney made a convincing enough argument that I went willingly and only turned him in to save my own ass. With good behavior and his well-connected parents, he could be out sooner. That’s why I had to run.
I even changed my name to prevent him from finding me. ”
“What?” I feigned shock, even though I’d uncovered Ever’s former name months ago. “I mean, it only makes sense.”
“As much sense as could be made of the whole situation, I suppose. My actual name is—”
Eliza.
“Eliza Everleigh Thomas.”
“Where did the Moore surname come from?”
“It was my maternal grandmother’s maiden name.”
“I think I prefer Nevermore.”
She smiled slightly as a hint of color stained her cheeks. “And I think I prefer this version of Loche Greene. Thank you for this. Two Thanksgivings in a row spent parked on my couch with Chinese takeout would probably have been more of a cry for help than I would care to have admitted.”
“Anytime.” I wanted to lean in and kiss her, and with the way she was looking at me, her gaze trailing from my eyes to my lips, I suspected she wanted me to as well.
Even though Ever had kissed me dozens of times before as V, this felt different.
More personal. Like maybe she was starting to have actual feelings for Loche, which should make me fucking ecstatic.
But instead, all it did was awaken the one thing I thought I’d never thought I’d see again: my conscience. “Ever, there’s something—”
“I’m sorry,” Ever blurted out, flustered. “I—I have to go.” She broke away from my arms, backing up and turning to head for the sliding glass door. “It’s been—I had a good time, Loche. I’ll see you at the office.”
Confused, I followed her inside my apartment, watching her snatch her coat from the back of the chair I’d thrown it over. From where they stood in the open kitchen, I made eye contact with Nix and my Mom, whose eyes volleyed back and forth between Ever and me.
“Nix, Evie, it was really nice meeting you.” Ever called out to them.
“Are you leaving?” Nix looked at me as if to ask What did you do?
“Yeah. I, uh, have to get back home.”
“Got more cookies to burn?” Nix asked, his face falling when I shot him a threatening look of my own.
“I just may,” Ever answered.
“Nice of you to come by, Ever. I hope my son hasn’t driven you away.”
“Mom!”
Ever slipped on her boots. “Trust me, if working with him hasn’t driven me away, nothing…” She paused mid-sentence as though something else had commanded her urgent attention, rendering her unable to focus on anything else.
“Ever?”
The sound of my voice seemed to snap her back down to reality. She shook her head, looking up at me, all color having drained from her face. “Whose red shoes are these?”
“Those eyesores are Loche’s,” Nix answered as though he had a bad taste in his mouth.
Ever’s eyes darted from the shoes to my face. “How long have you had these?”
Oh, shit. The shoes. I must have worn them as V at some point. Okay, well, I had two options. Either I tell Ever now—in front of my mother—or I lie to her—also in front of my mother.
“Maybe a week or two. Why do you ask?”
Well, I guess I’m going with the lie. It wasn’t totally unbelievable. I’d had those shoes for roughly three months and had worn them only occasionally. They could have passed for brand new.
“No reason.” She hesitated, her thoughts most likely traveling a mile a minute. “I’ll see you at the office.” Before leaving, she spared one last glance down at the shoes on the floor as though committing them to memory.
“I’m washing my hands of this whole thing,” Nix said, holding his hands up for dramatic effect as soon as Ever left. “You’re a lot of things, Loche Greene, but a liar has never been one of them. Until now.”
“What’s going on?” Mom joined the glaring war going on between Nix and me by firing a missile of her own my way.
“It’s a long story, Mom, but I promise you I have the best of intentions.”
She studied me, lines of concern etching her face, making her look older than her age. “Well, whatever is happening between the two of you, you need to run after that girl and chase her down. Don’t let that one get away. If you do, you’re going to regret it.”
“Don’t go giving him any more ideas,” Nix grumbled under his breath.
Ignoring Nix, I answered her. “Don’t worry, I have no intention of letting her get away from me.