Chapter 22
LIVVI
The room was quiet except for the faint hum of my air conditioner kicking on and off.
I should’ve been asleep an hour ago, but every time I closed my eyes, I saw Talon’s grin from the other night at the arcade.
The way he’d leaned closer when he’d teased me about my aim, the warmth in his laugh when I’d managed to beat him at basketball—it all looped in my mind like a song I couldn’t shake.
I hugged my pillow tighter and groaned.
This was a problem.
Because I wasn’t supposed to feel this way.
Right? I had work. And it was finally May—I was also about to graduate with two majors.
I had a successful career ahead of me. Not to mention there was also TheWriteGuy, who I still couldn’t quite stop thinking about.
Over the last few months, he’d become someone I trusted, someone I confided in.
Sure, we’d never met in person, but that didn’t make what we had feel any less real.
And now … now there was Talon. Real, complicated, right in front of me Talon.
I rolled over, grabbed my phone, and told myself I was just going to check the time. But the little notification bubble on my screen betrayed me.
TheWriteGuy
You awake?
My thumb hovered over the screen. I should ignore it, pretend I was asleep. But I didn’t want to. I wanted to talk to him. Maybe he’d help me sort through this confusing mess in my head.
I tapped open the chat.
ReadToLiv
Can’t sleep.
TheWriteGuy
Same.
Let me guess—you’re replaying your life decisions in your head a hundred different ways?
ReadToLiv
How do you always know?
TheWriteGuy
Writer instincts. Comes with the territory.
I smiled, already feeling more relaxed, lighter, just from talking to him. Just like I always did.
ReadToLiv
Can I ask you something?
TheWriteGuy
Always.
ReadToLiv
Do you ever … feel like you’re being pulled in two directions at once?
TheWriteGuy
All the time. Why?
I debated how much to say. How could I explain everything that I was thinking, feeling, without saying too much? But there was a part of me that wanted to tell him, that needed to tell him.
ReadToLiv
Because there’s someone in my life right now who … I don’t know. He’s unexpected. He makes me feel things I wasn’t ready for. And then there’s you.
TheWriteGuy
… Me.
ReadToLiv
Yeah. You.
And I feel like I’m betraying one by wanting the other. Which doesn’t even make sense because technically, there’s nothing official with either of you. But my heart doesn’t seem to care about technicalities.
I stared at the blinking cursor after I sent it, pulse racing. Too much. I’d said too much.
TheWriteGuy
It’s not betrayal to feel. You’re allowed to want connection. You’re allowed to explore what makes you happy.
ReadtoLiv
But what if I get it wrong? What if I choose the wrong person and ruin everything?
TheWriteGuy
Or what if you’re brave enough to take the chance and it turns out to be everything you’ve been looking for?
ReadToLiv
Easy for you to say.
TheWriteGuy
Not easy. Just true. Sometimes the scariest leap is the one that matters most.
I stared at the screen, rereading his last message until the words blurred, their meaning sinking into me deeper than I wanted them to.
TheWriteGuy believed in me. He always had. And yet, whenever Talon smiled at me, I’d believed in something too—something I hadn’t known I would ever believe in.
Before I could figure out how to respond, another bubble popped up.
TheWriteGuy
Can I be honest with you?
ReadToLiv
Always.
TheWriteGuy
You’re not the only one caught between two worlds.
ReadToLiv
What do you mean?
TheWriteGuy
I’ve been talking to someone, too. Spending time with her. In person.
ReadToLiv
Oh.
My stomach dropped. I didn’t know why—it wasn’t like I had any claim on him. But still, the words stung.
ReadToLiv
That’s … good. I mean, right? That’s what we’re both saying. That real life matters.
TheWriteGuy
Yeah. It’s good. She’s … surprising. She makes me feel like maybe I don’t have to hide parts of myself anymore.
I closed my eyes. The way he described her sounded achingly familiar, like how I felt with Talon.
ReadToLiv
Sounds like you really like her.
TheWriteGuy
I do. But I still value what we have. You’re important to me.
ReadToLiv
You’re important to me too.
The words felt heavier than they should have, like I was making a promise I didn’t fully understand.
TheWriteGuy
Maybe it’s time we stop hiding behind screens. Maybe it’s time we meet.
My heart slammed so hard, I thought I might actually drop the phone.
ReadToLiv
Meet?
TheWriteGuy
Yeah. We’ve known each other for a while now. I feel like we owe it to ourselves to see if this is real.
I stared at the message, nerves buzzing under my skin.
Part of me wanted to scream yes, to finally know.
Another part of me—an equal, stubborn part—was terrified.
What if meeting ruined everything? What if the connection didn’t survive the shift from words on a screen to face-to-face reality?
I didn’t know if I was ready to lose this relationship.
ReadToLiv
That’s … a big step.
TheWriteGuy
I know. No pressure. Just think about it.
But for what it’s worth, I think you might be braver than you realize.
I let out a shaky breath, staring at his words until the screen dimmed. Braver than I realized. Maybe. Or maybe I was just a woman with two hearts pulling her in opposite directions.
And the wildest part? Both pulls felt exactly the same.
I didn’t sleep. Not really. I tossed, I turned, I stared at the ceiling until the shadows transformed with the rising sun. By the time I dragged myself out of bed, my brain was a muddled knot of what-ifs and maybes.
TheWriteGuy wanted to meet. Talon was … well, Talon. Real and solid and maddening and wonderful. And I was smack in the middle, paralyzed with indecision.
I needed backup.
Which was how, an hour later, I ended up sitting at our tiny kitchen table in my pajamas with Roxie pouring coffee into mugs while Cali’s voice chirped through the speakerphone.
“Okay,” Cali said, the rustle of sheets in the background. “Start from the top. And don’t leave anything out this time.”
“She never does,” Roxie muttered, sliding a mug toward me as she plopped into the chair across from mine.
“Excuse me, I’m very concise,” I argued weakly.
Roxie arched an eyebrow. “Liv, last week you took twenty minutes to tell me how the cashier at Target gave you the wrong change.”
“That was important!”
“Uh-huh.” Roxie sipped her coffee like the picture of judgment.
“Ladies,” Cali broke in, laughter in her voice. “Focus. Liv, out with it.”
I wrapped my hands around my mug, letting the warmth soak into my palms. “So … there’s Talon.”
“The sexy swimmer,” Roxie added.
I ignored that. “We’ve been hanging out more and having fun. A lot of fun. And I can’t stop thinking about him.”
“And the problem is …?” Cali prompted.
“The problem,” I said, lowering my voice like someone might overhear, “is TheWriteGuy.”
“The online guy,” Roxie clarified.
“Yes. He’s been in my life for months. He knows me. He gets me. And now …” I hesitated, glancing between the phone and Roxie. “Now he wants to meet in person.”
“Ohhh,” Cali drawled, like this was suddenly her favorite piece of gossip. “So you’ve got yourself a little love triangle.”
“It’s not a love triangle,” I insisted.
“It absolutely is,” Roxie said. “Two guys. One girl. Conflict of the heart. Classic triangle.”
I groaned and dropped my head into my hands. “This is a disaster.”
“It’s not a disaster,” Cali said, her tone gentler now. “It’s just complicated. Tell us how you feel about each of them.”
I peeked through my fingers. “Do I have to?”
“Yes,” they chorused.
I lifted my head and blew out a breath. “Fine. Talon … he surprises me. He’s sarcastic and infuriating, but also … safe? Like, when I’m with him, I don’t have to pretend to be anything I’m not. And when he looks at me—” I broke off, heat rising to my cheeks. “It feels like he actually sees me.”
Roxie leaned her chin on her hand, smiling like a cat with cream. “You’re glowing right now, just so you know.”
“Am not.”
“Are too.”
“Okay, and TheWriteGuy?” Cali prompted.
My breath snagged halfway out. “With him, it’s different.
He was there for me before Talon. When I needed someone, he listened.
He encouraged me. He believed in me when I didn’t believe in myself.
And I … I care about him. I really do. But I don’t know if what we have online would survive in real life. ”
“That’s the risk,” Roxie said.
“Exactly,” I whispered. “And I’m scared. What if I choose wrong? What if I lose them both?”
For a moment, the kitchen was quiet except for the ticking clock on the wall.
“Liv,” Cali said finally, her voice soft but steady, “you’re acting like this is a test you can pass or fail. It’s not. It’s your heart. It’s messy. It’s allowed to be.”
“Yeah,” Roxie added. “And no offense, but you’re overthinking this to death. You don’t have to have it all figured out right this second.”
I stared into my coffee. “But TheWriteGuy asked to meet. That feels like a now decision.”
“Did he say when?” Cali asked.
“No. Just … sometime. He told me to think about it.”
“Then think about it,” Roxie said simply. “Don’t rush just because you feel guilty.”
I frowned. “Guilty?”
“Yes, guilty,” Roxie said, pointing her spoon at me. “You act like you owe them both something. You don’t. You owe yourself the truth. What do you want?”
The question lodged in my brain like a pebble in a shoe—small but impossible to ignore.
“I don’t know,” I admitted. “I want … I want the safety of what I have with TheWriteGuy. But I also want the spark I feel with Talon. And I don’t know if I’m allowed to want both.”
“You’re allowed to want both,” Cali said firmly. “But eventually, you’ll have to choose. And when you do, it should be because of how he makes you feel in the real world, not just on a screen.”
I bit my lip. “So you’re saying I should meet him.”
“I’m saying,” Cali countered, “you should only meet him if you want to. Not because you’re afraid of disappointing him.”
Roxie nodded. “And meanwhile, maybe stop fighting what’s happening with Talon. You light up when you talk about him, Liv. That’s not nothing.”
I sat back, my heart a tangled mess but a little lighter than before. Leave it to my friends to drag the truth out of me, whether I liked it or not.
“Ugh,” I groaned, pushing my hair out of my face. “Why can’t life be simple?”
“Because simple is boring,” Roxie said.
“And because you’d overanalyze it anyway,” Cali added.
I laughed despite myself, the knot in my stomach loosening just a fraction. They were right. I didn’t have to decide everything today. But someday soon, I would.
And that thought was both terrifying … and thrilling.