Chapter 40
FORTY
My stomach was in knots, and I felt like shit. I looked at Rachel’s house and debated whether I should check in on her or give her some space. The advice I gave her yesterday did not go well. She marched her cute little ass to Sunny Pines, only for her to come running right back.
Was there some kind of statistic that said surprising a man will backfire nine times out of ten?
Instead of checking in on her again because I felt as if I had already done enough damage, I headed toward the town square.
As I began to walk, I realized it would have been easier if I had driven, but I just needed a little alone time to get all my thoughts together.
Having everything you ever wanted wasn’t easy.
One second, you were happy, and the next, you started to have doubts.
It was a surreal feeling once you got everything you had ever prayed for.
Before, it was a dream to obtain something to keep you going or motivated, but now, it was a fear that it was a fluke or that it might get taken away.
I was putting too much faith into this walk, as if it would give me all the answers to questions I was too afraid to ask myself. This would have been so simple if we would have gotten our shit together back in high school.
My head was held high, and this time, I could take notice of the community I had left behind.
I wasn’t scared to meet their eyes anymore, and I didn’t hide my face in shame of what they would have thought.
People smiled at me, or they waved. Most of them didn’t judge me, and they probably never had.
I’ve seen most of these people my whole life. They watched me ride my bike around town. None of them blamed me for prom night, but I had it in my head that everyone had turned their backs on me.
A humorless chuckle escaped.
Being a teenager was one hell of a mess.
Talk about learning on the job, right? How many of us look back at the mistakes our younger selves have made and cringe, wishing for a way to turn back time to make things right?
But it was from those moments we grew. And there was something beautiful to be said about growth.
It was late enough in the day that you could hear kids running around the fountain and playing in the park across the street.
It was such a comforting sight. I remembered a time I ran around splashing water.
Almost all of my childhood memories involved Tyler—then, for a brief second, an image popped into my head that nearly made my knees buckle.
I had never given much thought about having children, or getting married for that matter.
Not when the only person I had ever wanted had been off-limits to me.
None of the guys I dated had been serious enough even to even consider it.
Speaking of children, I took a quick turn toward the doctor’s office.
I might be bumping uglies with the guy I always wanted, but I was not trying to have a baby.
Now that I was back in town, I was going to need someone to give me a prescription for birth control.
The plus side of having a sex life in college was that it got me far away from the Stevensons.
They were a lovely couple who had owned the local clinic for as long as I could remember.
How did one look at the doctor they’ve had their whole life, and suddenly be like, “I’m sexually active now? ”
At least it saved me from that first awkward conversation.
As I pulled the door, my eyes cast down to check the incoming message I had received that I didn’t see the person coming out.
“Shit,” I groaned, and the other person grunted.
My eyes widened when I looked up and saw Ezekiel standing there.
He had recovered much faster than I had.
“Are you sick?” he asked as he gave me a once-over.
I opened my mouth and immediately closed it. There was no way I would tell him what I was up to—EZ was like my older brother. Then there was the tidbit that he was the actual brother of the guy I was trying to baby-proof myself from.
“No, I was just coming to check in on one of my mom’s prescriptions,” I lied. “Are you sick?” I stood defensively and raised a brow.
“Just my yearly checkup,” he mumbled as he stepped aside and extended his hand toward the door, motioning for me to enter.
I hoped my smile didn’t look much like a grimace.
“Let me take care of this,” I said as I walked into the clinic.
When I walked in, I noticed one of my mom’s friends sitting down, and I timidly waved at her. I walked up to the receptionist and made an appointment for another day—preferably a day when I wouldn’t know anyone.
Ezekiel was still waiting there with his hands in his pockets.
“All good?” he asked.
“Yeah,” I said, taking him by his arm and dragging him with me. Thank God for purses and oblivious men.
As we walked, I groaned when I noticed Sam approaching us on her way to the salon. Since EZ was with me, I didn’t think she would stop to say anything to me.
I thought wrong.
Her face instantly soured once she made contact with me. Her eyes immediately went to our linked arms. I fought the urge to unwrap it as if I had done something wrong.
“Jumping from one brother to the next,” she sneered.
I took a deep breath because I didn’t want to cause a public scene.
EZ did not share my sentiments.
“That was you, Sam,” he told her. “And we both know exactly how Ty feels about her.”
She rolled her eyes and then glared at Ezekiel. Instead of saying more, she stomped past us.
“Was Ty okay after she slept with Adam?” I blurted before I could think better of it. My hand came to my mouth as if that would take back the word vomit.
EZ chuckled.
“He didn’t care. She didn’t matter to him, and Adam knew that.”
My lips made a silent “O” but refused to comment further. I didn’t want EZ to think I was fishing for compliments.
“Now you, on the other hand,” he murmured. “I could have sworn he thought about killing Adam when he showed up to the house with you.”
My cheeks warmed at his words.
“Oh, let’s see what’s going on with Divine Corner today,” I told EZ as I dragged him toward the crystal shop.
Surprisingly, he let me drag him along with me. We were about to cross the street while I still had my hand on him when we heard the screeching of tires. Both Ezekiel and I turned just in time to see a car driving away.
Hmm. Guess they might be in a hurry.
“What is a Divine Corner?” he asked, bemused.
“The tarot card shop here,” I told him as I pointed to the shop window.
EZ looked at the windowpane, then up toward the shop’s name, and finally at me.
“Never noticed this place,” he noted.
“You serious?” I asked.
He shrugged.
If anyone needed a damn crystal more than me, it was him. That damn pink crystal got me laid. There was bound to be something that could help Ezekiel heal his broken little heart.
Ezekiel trailed behind me as I walked into the store. I almost opened my mouth to tell him not to touch anything, but maybe if he touched it then it called to him?
“Does anything call to your attention?”
Ezekiel looked at me like I was crazy. He looked around dismissively and then shook his head.
As if being summoned, the shop owner walked out.
“He needs a crystal. It doesn’t matter what kind, but he needs something,” I told her as soon as we made eye contact.
Her lips twitched. Her eyes then went to Ezekiel, who seemed to freeze for a few seconds but then recovered.
“Simone,” EZ mumbled.
“Ohmigod, I’m so rude, I’ve never asked your name,” I told her. I then extended my hand toward her. “Astrid Hart.”
She smiled at me, her bright teeth a striking combination against her dark lips.
“In your defense, you kept running out of here every time you did wander by,” she teased me. She then mimicked my action and extended her hand. “Simone Rivers.”
I felt my smile slowly start to fall off my face.
Was she Collin’s older sister? I knew he had a sibling who had graduated before we had, but never had put a name to the face. Her face softened a bit.
“I’m really thankful for what you did on prom night. My brother was a real dick for the way he acted. He was just happy he finally fit in.”
“And I ruined it,” I sighed, surprised by my lack of venom.
“You saved him,” she told me. “And I’m genuinely sorry how everyone reacted. Collin is especially sorry for the part he played.”
I tried to smile, but I knew it must have looked like a grimace. What did one say to that?
“Now that I have dampened the mood, how about we clean up Ezekiel’s aura? It’s honestly suffocating me,” she joked to lighten the mood.
“I’m okay. I don’t believe in this nonsense,” he said, storming out.
Both Simone and I watched him go.
When our faces met, she gave me a sad smile. “I think I remind him too much of Sabby.”
That explained more about Ezekiel, and I felt sorry for him if he was that unnerved by the memory of someone who was long gone.