Epilogue
Claudia
I haven’t brought my dad’s bear to the hospital with me.
I didn’t have time to go home and fetch him.
Nick and I were both in our hotel room, getting ready for the premiere, when the call came, much sooner than we’d been expecting, telling us it was time.
Frantically, we headed straight for JFK.
It’s a long flight from New York to Los Angeles.
We were really scared, through all of it.
It felt like history repeating.
Only it was different, because we were together.
And even though she’s come early, it’s not too early.
She’s ok.
We’re with her.
I didn’t know how this was going to work. I’ve been terrified to trust it. Petrified that this child would somehow look at me, us, as interlopers.
Strangers.
‘Come on, Claude,’ Phil’s kept saying. ‘You know better than that.’
He and Mum are already on a flight over from London with Lisa and Hannah. Nick’s parents are on their way from Montana too. They’ll all be here soon.
But for now, it’s just us three, here together.
Nick’s holding her, so tiny, so perfect, and I’m right beside him, my finger held firm in her clinging grip, which I know is just a reflex – I’ve read all the books – but it feels like a lot more than that.
We haven’t named her.
Not yet.
We’ve got time.
For the moment, we’re silent: not talking, just becoming.
Us.
And I’m not scared any more.
She’s not looking at either of us like we’re strangers.
It really does seem as though she, so calm, and peaceful, and trusting, knows who she’s with.
And the longer I look at her, I know that I know her too.
She blinks.
Her mouth moves in a silent o, nose scrunching, and my heart overflows.
Hello, you, I wordlessly tell her, pressing my lips to her forehead, closing my eyes at the sensation of her little fist tightening even harder around mine.
I’ve been waiting for you. We’ve both been waiting.
I open my eyes, looking deep into hers, so round and huge, windows to her soul, and feel my cheeks lift in a smile. I think we might have met before.
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