Chapter 43
Chapter Forty-Three
EchoZone – Private Message Thread
MustLoveMusic: I’m going to therapy.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: Hello to you too.
MustLoveMusic: I saw you were online. A rare occurrence on a Friday.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: I’m multitasking. The caterer decided that fish was a better option than portobello mushrooms for those who chose vegetarian.
MustLoveMusic: Ouch.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: Yep. I have about four hours to figure this out, or this wedding is going to be a major disaster. How are you?
MustLoveMusic: Confused.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: ?
MustLoveMusic: Yes, I’m wearing a question mark on my chest.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: Well, I’m shocked that someone can think fish is okay for vegetarians, but why are you confused?
MustLoveMusic: I’m sorry you’re going through this.
Why am I confused? It’s been a long week. I spoke with legal, then with a therapist. Then another therapist. And today I think I finally found one that might be able to help me. I have to make a few decisions and hope that they’re the best ones to close this cycle.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: Which cycle?
MustLoveMusic: The one where the press—and my stepbrother—use my past or my family’s past to make money.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: That sounds . . . exhausting.
MustLoveMusic: I’m not even sure who I’m angry at anymore. Him. The press. Myself for getting lost in it while it’s happening. Maybe all of us.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: You don’t have to carry all of it.
MustLoveMusic: Easier said than done.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: True. But saying it is a start.
MustLoveMusic: I don’t know how to stop letting it define me.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: Then maybe it’s not about stopping. Maybe it’s about building something bigger than what they took from you.
MustLoveMusic: You sound like a therapist.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: You’re the one who said you were going. Maybe I should charge you per session.
MustLoveMusic: What are you going to charge me?
AlyEuphoriaEvents: A weekend in Baja with you?
MustLoveMusic: . . . you want to go away with me?
AlyEuphoriaEvents: I want to be on a beach with a drink in my hand, but no one is asking me about fish.
Whether or not you’re there is up for debate.
MustLoveMusic: Rude. But okay. I’ll take my chances. I could find us a quiet cove. No one around to hear what you sound like when I finally get my hands on you.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: Private sounds dangerous.
MustLoveMusic: Completely.
And if we’re alone together like that, I’ll have my hands on you before we even finish unpacking.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: You make that sound like a bad thing.
MustLoveMusic: Oh, it’s very, very bad. I’d want you spread out on cool sheets, legs open, sun pouring through the window, that little sigh you make when I kiss your neck . . .
AlyEuphoriaEvents: Dex . . . not now. I’m trying to figure out the fish issue.
MustLoveMusic: Just trying to set the scene. I’m very thorough. You know, it’s the attention to detail.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: Pretty sure you’re trying to make me squirm at work.
MustLoveMusic: Is it working?
AlyEuphoriaEvents: . . . I’m not answering that.
MustLoveMusic: So that’s a yes.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: I’m going to block you.
MustLoveMusic: You try, and I’ll show up at your door with nothing but an apology and my mouth on standby.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: Dexter.
MustLoveMusic: What? You threaten to cut me off, I just offer alternate methods of communication.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: You’re not helping right now.
MustLoveMusic: And yet, here you are. Still online. Still talking to me. Still squirming in your chair, probably crossing your legs tighter.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: I hate that you’re right.
MustLoveMusic: No, you love that I know you. Even when we’re miles apart. Even when all I can do is type what I want to do to you.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: I thought you were having a crisis.
MustLoveMusic: Forgot about it the moment you mentioned ‘beach’ and I decided we should just run away and forget about the world.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: Could we?
MustLoveMusic: I wish. I have to deal with this shitshow. The last thing I want is for any of this to come and fuck me over again. More when it’ll affect you in the long run.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: You don’t have to protect me from the mess. You realize that, right?
MustLoveMusic: Yeah. But I want to. I’ve already hurt people I care about by not getting ahead of things. I don’t want to add your name to that list.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: You’re not hurting me. Though I could use some help with the ache between my thighs every time you send a message like that.
MustLoveMusic: . . . well, now I’m conflicted.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: Don’t be. I said ache, not complaint.
MustLoveMusic: You’re going to kill me. I’ll be the first man to die of an online crush and a complete lack of self-control.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: You’d deserve it. You started it.
MustLoveMusic: And I’ll finish it sooner rather than later. With your legs over my shoulders and your voice hoarse from saying my name.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: Dex.
MustLoveMusic: That’s what you’ll sound like. All breathless and needy. You’re going to beg me not to stop, and I’m not going to listen.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: I should log off.
MustLoveMusic: You won’t.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: . . . no. I won’t. But if I go silent for five minutes, it’s because I’m pretending to care about fish again.
MustLoveMusic: Noted. I’ll just be here, picturing you pressing your thighs together under the table, pretending not to be soaked.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: Ugh . . .
MustLoveMusic: Tell me, are you wet?
AlyEuphoriaEvents: You’re impossible.
MustLoveMusic: You didn’t answer the question.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: Yes.
MustLoveMusic: Fuck. Is your chair damp, baby?
AlyEuphoriaEvents: Do you want me to check?
MustLoveMusic: I want you to slide your hand down, under that pretty little skirt you wore to be taken seriously today. I want you to feel how much you want me. Right there. While you’re supposed to be solving someone else’s wedding crisis.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: You have no idea what you’re doing to me.
MustLoveMusic: Oh, I know. I want you to dip your fingers in slowly. Then imagine it’s me. Tongue deep, hands gripping your thighs, your heels digging into my back as I taste you like it’s the last thing I’ll ever do.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: Dexter.
MustLoveMusic: Say it again. Just like that. God, I’d give anything to be under your chair right now—on my knees, your legs over my shoulders, my mouth buried in you until you come all over my face.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: I can’t breathe. My hand is—Dex, I’m so close.
MustLoveMusic: Don’t stop. You’re gonna come for me, baby. Right there at your desk. Be good and soak those fingers while you imagine my mouth on you. My voice in your ear.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: I’m going to—
MustLoveMusic: Come, Aly. Right now.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: . . .
AlyEuphoriaEvents: I think I just saw stars.
MustLoveMusic: Good. Next time we’ll be together. I want to feel it. Taste it. Worship every second of it until you’re too spent to move.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: You are dangerous.
MustLoveMusic: You started it. Now I’m hard as hell—and emotionally compromised. Thanks for that.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: I wish I could say I’m sorry, but . . . just think of me while you jerk off. I bet you’re not that confused anymore.
MustLoveMusic: Nope. I’m fixing this shit soon so I can go back to you.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: Oh.
MustLoveMusic: Not just for the beach. Not just for what we say here. For you. The real thing. You and your coffee addiction. You and your bossy voice. You with your mouth on mine. You, driving me absolutely insane.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: Dex . . .
MustLoveMusic: I mean it. I want your bad days. Your sarcastic texts. Your three A.M. breakdowns—if you have them. I want to hear you laugh when you’re happy and fall asleep with your leg over mine. I want you in ways I don’t even know how to write into lyrics yet.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: You’re not playing fair.
MustLoveMusic: Not trying to. I’m just done pretending I don’t want more than this screen. You still thinking about me while you catch your breath?
AlyEuphoriaEvents: . . . yeah. And I’m not pretending either.
MustLoveMusic: Hope the fish situation gets sorted soon. Eddie says he knows a caterer who’s going to call you.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: You’re with people while we were . . .
MustLoveMusic: No. Just called him after. He wants to know what else you need.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: You sent Maison Parra to replace the other caterer. Dex—they’re gorgeous and wildly out of budget. I can’t afford them.
MustLoveMusic: I can. Take it as a gift. I don’t want my girl stressing over someone else’s salmon disaster.
AlyEuphoriaEvents: Your girl?
MustLoveMusic: Yeah. Unless you’re blocking me now?
AlyEuphoriaEvents: . . . no blocking.
MustLoveMusic: Good. Chat soon.