Chapter eight
Laiken
“Bro.” Brady, my younger brother and Mayson Ridge’s firefighter of the year award holder, lifts a hand to Trace. “Digging the hat.”
Trace gives him a high five before he climbs into the booth beside him, leaving me to sit alone opposite them.
“I’m going to the restroom. Be right back.” I toss my purse on the seat.
Brady waves me off as Trace launches into his latest adventure at the ranch. I escape to the bathroom, my breath lodged in my throat until I hit the stall.
“Breathe,” I murmur as I take deep breaths to refill my lungs.
Tears threaten to fall, but I squeeze my eyes shut. I will not cry. I will not cry over Parker Stillwater. I cried enough tears to fill the freaking Atlantic. He doesn’t get any more.
Tori.
The single name still makes it feel like my heart is being ripped from my chest. Flashes from seven years ago filter across my brain. The pictures. The media. His silence.
I was so stupid. So young and na?ve. Foolish to think a few summers with me actually meant something.
That what we had was real. Clearly, I was mistaken.
He threw us away the second a shiny new thing came his way.
And that shiny new thing had beautiful chestnut hair, golden eyes, and killer legs.
And here I am. Sporting freckles, stretch marks, and hips that didn’t lie.
I couldn’t hold a candle to her. Especially not now.
Shaking my head, I push away the negative thoughts. I’m not some distraught teenager anymore. I’ve grown up. Moved on.
“Yeah, that’s why her name on a screen has you hiding in a bathroom stall,” I mutter to myself as I straighten my sweater with annoyance.
Clearing my throat, I step out and over to the sink, then check my appearance once more before taking a solid breath.
Everything is fine. My home may be a lost cause, and I’m about to indulge in my own personal version of hell for the next six weeks, but I can handle it.
I’m a mom, for crying out loud. I gave birth with an epidural that never kicked in and managed to survive on mediocre sleep while keeping Brady out of jail and my mom out of a deep depression.
Thank God Maddox was able to keep it together after Dad passed because I’m not sure I could have handled anything else.
I can do this. It’s my job. And Parker Stillwater is just another patient with a medical need. Nothing more.
“Why are we taking a bath at Nana’s?” Trace asks as he peers at me from the tub.
His hair is slicked into a bubbled Mohawk, while his horse figurines line the edge of the tub.
“Remember, I told you we were having some water issues at the new house.”
“But I want to sleep in my new room.” He pouts.
“We will.” I point to the washrag. “Scrub, then we can get your jams on and head back.”
We could stay the night here, but after spending a week getting everything settled, it felt like taking a huge step backward if we moved back in.
It’s just water. We can get cleaned up here, then sleep in our beds.
I’ll have the water fixed soon enough. As soon as these six weeks are up. No big deal.
“Do I have to go to school on Monday?” he asks.
We do this every week.
“Yes. You want to grow up to be smart, don’t you?” I question as I grab a towel out of the cabinet.
“Uncle Mads doesn’t go to school,” he grumbles. “And he’s smart.”
I chuckle. “He already went to school.”
“I want to go to cowboy school.”
“You got plenty of time to be a cowboy.”
He dumps a cup of water over his head, his copper Mohawk dismantling in an instant.
He grins up at me, and I feel that part of my heart warm.
The one that can’t believe that I get to be his mom.
That I get to be the one to watch him grow.
He blinks his blue eyes that illuminate his heart-shaped face.
His slanted chin is the only feature he inherited from Rhodes.
Rhodes.
Every time the name slithers across my mind, my body tenses.
I still can’t summon the will to understand what the heck I had been thinking.
I didn’t even like him. I learned that during the two months we dated freshman year of high school.
If you could even consider it dating. It didn’t take long to figure out what kind of guy he was.
He was a bully, and he always had something foul to say to Cooper and Parker.
Maybe my subconscious thought I was getting back at Parker.
Delivering the best revenge for breaking my heart.
Considering I was plastered, I’m not exactly sure what my thought process was.
But in the end, even though it was a single mistake, I came out with the greatest unexpected blessing.
And Rhodes…he acted as if we would be some instant family.
But when he found out he wasn’t getting me along with the surprise baby, he never wanted a thing to do with him.
Until having Trace benefited him in some way.
He would show up. A year might turn into two, but it never failed for him to pass through and cause trouble for the sake of causing it.
I’ve done my best to protect Trace. To shield him from the toxicity of his father, but the fact anytime I had a run-in with Rhodes, Trace asked to sleep in bed with me that night, made it clear. He knew. And it killed me.
“Clean as a whistle,” he chirped.
“All right, cowboy.” I hold out the towel. “Let’s get you home.”