Chapter 29 - Nate
Thanksgiving on my family's farm always hits before I’m ready for it.
This year, I can actually go. It's early October, with cold mornings and frost that starts to cling to the fence rails like lace. The smell of wood smoke drifts from the chimney long before the sun finishes climbing over the ridge. A realization hits me, I’ve missed this, missed all of it.
But it never feels more like home than when Tessa’s hand is tucked inside mine.
Tessa was invited to too many family dinners to count. This community, the families all adore her. But she chose to be with me today. The fact that she could be anywhere or be with anyone, but she wants to be with me, with my family... It warms my chest, like a shot of whiskey.
Mom comes out onto the porch, wiping her hands on a dishtowel, smiling so wide her cheeks crease.
Dad follows behind her slower, nodding once in that quiet, solid way he does.
Kenzie barrels out next, grabs Tessa, and pulls her into the house before anyone can say a word.
I follow Tessa like she is my gravity, watching the way my family interacts with her.
Taking in how she fits in a way no one else ever could.
Inside, the house is warm with the heat of the woodstove, the smell of cinnamon, and the familiarity of roasted turkey roasting low in the oven.
Eli comes into the kitchen, dining area, carrying some god-awful pumpkin centrepiece he claims he “crafted,” which looks like it escaped a children’s craft hour.
Kenzie shoves him. “Stop showing people that, you’re embarrassing us.”
Tessa laughs, warm and bright, and that sound goes through me in a straight line.
Mom fusses, trying to make everything perfect.
But it already is. Dad grins at me over Mom's head.
He looks so relaxed today, like a weight has been lifted off him.
Eli is talking to Tessa about a rodeo coming up in the city.
Kenzie jumps in, asking Tessa when she will be heading back out to some of the farms and if she can join again.
It’s loud. It’s home. It’s everything I’ve been missing.
Tessa sits beside me at the table, her knee pressed against mine, her hand sliding down to squeeze my thigh every now and then as my parents reminisce. I watch her tuck a curl behind her ear, smile at something my mom says, and lean into Kenzie’s shoulder when she shows her photos on her phone.
And I don’t know when it happens, maybe somewhere between the mashed potatoes and the pumpkin pie, but something shifts. I start to see it. Clearly.
What I’ve been avoiding looking at straight-on.
A future... A future here in Hawthorne Ridge with my family, Tessa at my side, growing old sitting at this table, every year for the rest of our lives.
I swallow down the knot in my throat and blink away the tears that I can't seem to control.
I close my eyes for a moment and see her, pregnant, in the kitchen with my mom, laughing over old stories and sharing family recipes, her holding my hand under this table to steady me during every holiday, and her children.
.. our children, running through the kitchen barefoot and out into the backyard.
I have been pushing this life away so hard, running headfirst into the life in the city. The life of the star hockey player. But right here, right now... I know.
It hits me so hard I have to reach for my water like I’m choking.
Tessa looks over, concern flickering across her face. “You okay?”
I nod, desperately trying to keep it together. “Yeah. Just… full.”
Her deep blue eyes, which still somehow seem warm, dance across my face, and then she smiles softly before returning her attention to my dad.
After dishes are washed and leftovers tucked into containers, the afternoon light starts turning that warm autumn honey-gold.
I lean close to her ear. “Come for a ride with me.”
Her eyes catch mine, bright and curious. “Now?”
“Now.”
I don’t bother explaining; I just take her hand and lead her outside.
We saddle Lady May and Duke for the ride. Tessa swings up into the saddle effortlessly, dress hitched up around her thighs, boots in the stirrups, hair loose and blowing in the wind.
Fuck. She knocks the breath out of me.
We ride across the fields, past the fence lines and the old barn, through the tall grass that brushes the horses’ flanks.
Everything smells like earth and cold, and the stretch of autumn before winter takes over.
She rides ahead of me sometimes, laughing when Lady May prances through a field of wildflowers.
Other times, she slows, letting me move beside her.
You can tell this is exactly where Tessa was meant to be, wild and free.
She talks about the soil, the trees, and the ridge where the deer bed down.
She’s more a part of this land than I’ve been in years. And somehow… She brings me back to it.
We reach my favourite spot, a clearing near an old maple with roots that twist like sleeping animals beneath the ground.
I tie Duke’s reins to the low branch; Tessa does the same with Lady May.
The light hits her then, all gold, glinting through her hair, turning her skin warm.
She smooths her dress down over her hips, cheeks pink from the cold.
I step toward her, and she meets me halfway.
“You’re quiet,” she says softly.
I cup her face. “I’m just… taking you in.”
Her lip’s part, breath catching. “Nate…”
“I mean it.” My thumb traces the curve of her cheek. “I forget how beautiful this place is until I’m here with you.”
Her smile is soft and full and absolutely lethal. “You grew up with it. You probably stopped seeing it for what it is.”
“Maybe.” I breathe out and then lean in. “But you bring it back to life for me. Sometimes it feels like you are breathing life back into me, and I didn't even know a part of me was dying.”
She sucks in a breath and blushes, the kind that starts low in her chest and climbs upward.
Something shifts then, something in me, something reckless, something primal. I pull her closer, my hands sliding down her waist and travelling low, fingertips catching the hem of her dress. She gasps softly, the sound fluttering against my mouth.
“Nate…” she warns lightly, laughing when I nuzzle her jaw. “We’re outside.”
“I don’t care.”
She laughs, breathless and bright. “We’re at your parents’ farm.”
“I still don’t care.”
She looks up at me, dark blue eyes wide but shining, that wild edge to her smile that destroys me. Then she whispers, “Okay.”
I kiss her hard, it's hungry and desperate. Like, I can’t get enough of her. She pushes back against me, her hands in my hair, mouth opening under mine like she’s been waiting all day for this.
I guide her backward until her back meets the rough bark of the maple. She shivers, not from the cold, but from the way my hands trail down her thighs, lifting the soft layers of her dress.
“I don’t have anything on me,” I murmur against her lips, breathing her in, our eyes locked.
“Ok,” she whispers, tugging me closer. Her voice is warm and certain. I swear I'm almost broken from how much I love her.
Her boots dig into my back as she wraps her legs around me.
Her dress is hitched up high.
Her breath is warm and uneven against my ear.
The world narrows to her.
Her mouth.
The way she gasps when I push inside her, tight, warm, welcoming.
“Fuck, Tess...”
“Don’t stop,” she whispers, nails dragging along my shoulders. Her grip is tight.
The field is all gold and fire around us. Leaves drift from the branches above. Her hair gets tangled in my fingers. Her mouth finds mine again and again. I move with her like it’s the only thing I know how to do. She clings to me like she’s trying to pull me inside her soul.
“Look at me,” she gasps.
I do, and I am ruined.
Because her eyes... God, her eyes. They hold every version of the life I didn’t know I wanted, staring back at me.
When she falls apart in my arms, it pulls me with her.
Her name leaves my mouth in panted gasps.
When it’s done, she melts against me, her forehead against mine, breath warm, lips brushing my cheek.
“I love you,” she whispers.
I close my eyes. “I love you,” I breathe back, holding her tighter, grounding myself in the one thing that feels real.
And somewhere deep in my chest, something settles.
Something dangerous.
Something certain.
This is it.
She’s it.
This is the life I want.
The future I want.
The woman I want to build everything with.
Today, in this field, with her dress rucked up and her laughter still clinging to the air...
I let myself believe, just for a moment, that nothing could take her from me. I tell myself that I will figure this all out. I will have it all.
The drive back to Summit City feels lighter than anything has in weeks.
Tessa sits curled into the passenger seat, her hair still messy from the wind and… other things. My hoodie’s drowning her, and every few minutes she reaches across the console to touch me, my arm, my thigh, my hand, like her body can’t help but be connected to me.
I can feel every place we touched in the field.
She hums along to whatever is playing on the radio, even though she doesn’t know half the songs. She keeps stealing glances at me when she thinks I’m not looking.
When we get back to the city, the skyline rising up around us, she reaches for my hand again, thumb brushing my knuckles. “You sure you want me to come?” she asks softly. “It’s your team thing. I don’t want to crash guy time.”
“You’re not crashing anything.”
I squeeze her hand. “You’re part of this, too. Where I go, you go.”
Her eyes flicker with something warm, nervous, and hopeful. If I could bottle that look, I would.
A few of the guys live in the same complex, so we meet in one of their apartments, with high ceilings, music playing, and food spread across the counter in a way that looks like everyone kept trying to contribute until it turned into chaos.
“Tessa!” Reeves calls the second we walk in. “Did you bring the good pie from Maggie?”
“Rude,” I mutter. “It’s my family pie. Not hers.”
But she’s already laughing and holding out the foil-covered dish mom insisted on sending with her.
McKenna swoops in next, hugging her like they’ve been best friends for years.
Anders and Petrov fight over who gets to show her the view from the balcony.
Half the rookies lurk awkwardly until she smiles at them, and suddenly they all relax at once.
It still amazes me how seamlessly she fits into both sides of my life that rarely touch.
She moves around the room, and I cannot take my eyes off her as she jokes with the guys and listens intently to their stories. She talks to them like she’s known them all forever, but she never tries too hard. This isn't a performance, she’s just herself.
Petrov tosses a popcorn kernel at me across the room when he catches me staring at her like a lunatic. “Stop making heart-eyes at Tessa and come over here,” he teases.
Tessa turns to look at me and blushes a little. “Go.”
“I’ll go if you come too.” I need you close.
She rolls her eyes but follows. Petrov smirks when she sits on the arm of the couch beside me. “Perfect,” he says, tapping his beer against mine. “Since the cowgirl is here, we can settle something important.”
She laughs. “I’m scared. Should I be scared?”
“Yes,” Petrov says at the same time McKenna says, “No,” which immediately starts an argument between them.
Finally, Petrov grins widely and announces, “Halloween game bet.”
Tessa tilts her head. “Halloween… bet?”
“It’s a day game this year,” McKenna explains. “Everyone dresses up. Fans. Media. The whole thing. And afterward, we’ve got the kids’ charity event with the sponsors and box holders.”
“And,” Petrov says dramatically, “rookies choose the captains’ costumes if they lose.”
Anders cuts in, “Correction, rookies choose your costume if you lose.”
Petrov points at Tessa, triumphant. “And if you lose,” he drags it out, “Tessa picks.”
She looks at me, laughing. “Wait. I get to choose their Halloween costumes?”
“You do,” Petrov says. “And we will suffer.”
“And if the rookies win…” Anders smirks, flashing his phone, “They pick your costume, Tessa.”
Her eyes widen. “Me? Why me?”
“Collateral damage,” McKenna says. “Team bonding.... Pick one.”
“So good,” Petrov exclaims cheerfully.
Tessa laughs, a full, real laugh, and looks at me like she’s waiting for me to veto it.
Instead, I wrap an arm around her waist and nudge my nose against her temple. “You in?” I murmur.
She smiles at me, soft and wicked all at once. “I mean, I have no idea what you are talking about. I feel like I am in trouble any which way this pans out, but I am in.”
Petrov woops. Reeves comes up beside us, "Olivia and I are in too. She will be at the game and event with me."
And I swear the whole room feels like it exhales. Like for the first time in too long, it’s easy. We are just friends spending the holiday together. No pressure, no cameras, no GM, no PR decks ready to swallow us whole.
Just her and me.
I hold her a little closer without meaning to.
She leans into me, kisses my jaw, laughs when Petrov vows revenge against some perceived slight from Jensen, and fits against my side like she was carved out of the same rib my heart beats behind.