37. October 27th
Angie
“You look gorgeous today,” Rafael says, taking my hand as I step out of his Range wearing a form-fitting yellow sweater dress with a matching cropped sweater. The country club valet is already making his way around to the driver’s side when I grab my boyfriend”s arm.
“Thank you,” I smile. “You’re looking rather handsome yourself.” His dark teal, long sleeve polo compliments my outfit just right. And paired with his slacks, expensive watch, and even a couple rings, he’s every bit the sophisticated gentleman. His rich bergamot, lemon, and cedar wood scent fill my senses and wrap me in a comforting embrace as we stroll into the haughty club.
“Ms. Johanssen? Mr. Jimenez?” A staff member dressed in black pants and a white dress shirt asks, standing just inside.
“Yes,” Rafael answers.
She indicates for us to follow her. “Right this way, please.”
I can already hear the 1salsa music playing. Dark wood paneling and bright chandeliers line the enormous hallway with carpet that looks like it was designed specifically for this place.
“I can’t believe Jay’s parents are members here,” I murmur, leaning into Raf.
“Shh, blend in,” he stage-whispers. “They can smell your fear.”
“Shut up,” I mutter, nudging him in the ribs.
“Here we are,” the staff member says with a smile as she stands outside two propped open doors into a freaking ballroom. “If you need anything, please don’t hesitate to ask any member of our staff.”
“Thank you,” we both say and step into the strangest baby shower I’ve ever seen.
People are mingling everywhere, and I spot Raf’s moms already dancing alongside several others including Joaquín and Cora’s Aunt Rose, who’s throwing her head back in cheer as Joaquín spins her.
But my eyes catch on the decorations. Clearly Kathleen had one idea for décor, and… I’m guessing my brothers had another. Mixed between giant vases of autumnal floral arrangements, elegant displays of macrons, and trendy balloon arches, are Halloween decorations. Jack-o-lanterns, a giant inflatable spider, cauldrons, and fun-size candy scattered on all the tables.
Then I noticed the Día de los Muertos décor. Colorful papel picados strung between chandeliers and ceiling beams, candy skulls on the bar, and marigolds everywhere.
“They’re here!” someone shouts, taking me out of my bewilderment. Jonah is the first to run up to us, taking us both in his arms. “Do you like it?” he asks cheerily.
“It’s a little macabre for a baby shower,” I chuckle.
“You think so?” he asks genuinely. “Jay’s mom said we could help with the decorations,” he says, scratching the back of his actually-styled hair.
Isaiah and Dane are the next to come up, also wearing suits. “Look,” Dane says, pointing to the closest string of cut paper banners. “All the guys on the team helped make it.”
“Oh my god,” Rafael says in disbelief. “They managed to cut rugby balls in them,” he chuckles.
“I tried to tell them,” Kathleen Bishops says, coming up to give both me and Raf a hug looking every bit like a member of this country club.
“Oh my gosh, Kathleen,” I beam. “Thank you so much for all of this. Everything is beautiful.”
“It was my pleasure. Are you sure you’re okay with the…spiders and skulls?” she asks, looking around the room with apprehension. “Your brothers kind of…showed up and took over.”
“Honestly, I love it,” I tell her, and I do. It’s all over the place and unexpected—it feels pretty on-brand for Rafael and myself if I’m being honest. It reminds me of all the Día de los Muertos celebrations we had at his house growing up. We’d eat enough sugar to make everyone sick, sing, and celebrate our loved ones who have passed on. We didn’t often talk about my mom in our house, but there was something special about this day that we allowed ourselves to open up to each other.
So yeah, maybe it is macabre for a baby shower theme, but it reminds me of happier times with our families, and it makes me hopeful for our future.
The next hour passes faster than I can process. Cora and I each mingle more with our respective crowds, but we still manage to find each other and giggle at the elegant chaos. Rafael stays close to me, one hand placed on me at all times.
We told everyone the good news of our relationship a few days after we made it official. I’m glad we did because telling them at an event like this would have been pandemonium.
I’m truly touched at the turnout for this. My family is here, the entire Philadelphia Men’s Rugby Team, Cora’s Aunt Shelly was able to bring her mom from the nursing home for a few hours with assistance from the facility. Even friends I haven’t seen in a while like Robyn are here. She had a playoff rugby game yesterday in Maryland, and she still made it. I wish I had more time to talk to her, but she’s keeping busy talking with the other ruggers. Everyone except Isaiah who seems to catch a frown every time she goes near them.
Whatever, his problem.
Rafael and I have a mountain of presents to open, and by the time we’re done, my cheeks hurt from smiling for so long and Raf’s pockets are full of my used tissues.
I’m sorry, but how am I expected not to cry when we’re given tiny socks and matching outfits?
2When everything is cleared away and the room’s chatter finds a natural lull, I stand up from my chair on the small stage and Raf grabs a microphone from one of the staff members. When he hands it to me with a smile, he then pulls out a folded piece of paper from his pocket and hands it to me as well.
Looking at Cora, Jay, and Marco sitting next to me, they all give me a nod of encouragement, so I swallow and address the room. “Thank you all for coming. This day has been so incredibly beautiful thanks to you, our family and friends. I’d like to take this opportunity to read a passage from the baby journal my mother kept when she was pregnant with me until I was one. It struck something in me and I, well, I just wanted to share it with you all.”
Unfolding the print-out of her journal entry, I clear my shaky throat and try to calm my nerves by taking a deep breath. “My sweet Angela,” I start, already choking at the words. “Today you are two days old,” I cry. Raf’s hand rubs at my back as he stands next to me, but when I look up at him, he’s unable to fight back the tears, too.
“I don’t know if I can do this,” I whisper to him, dropping the microphone lower.
“I don’t know if I can either,” he says, sucking in a shaky breath.
“Let me, bunny.” I turn my head and in front of me, my dad stands tall, wearing a dress shirt under a sweater and a look of quiet confidence.
Silently, I hand him the microphone as my smile trembles.
“Hello, everyone,” he says. “My name is Neal, and…my wife wrote this.” Rafael hands me another clean tissue as I let go and listen.
“My sweet Angela. Today you are two days old,” he repeats in a strong and slow cadence. “You were surrounded all day by those who want nothing more than your health and happiness. You were surrounded by love. We held you close as family and friends fawned over you, my perfect girl with nothing but peach fuzz for hair and arresting blue eyes.
“I hope you know how much you’re loved beyond today, beyond tomorrow. I hope love engulfs your life. I hope it drives your decisions, amplifies your successes, and heals your mistakes,” Dad says, his own breathing now uneven. “I hope someday you feel what I feel for you. Love, Mama.”
When he turns to face me fully, his body language remains composed, but his eyes spill the truth.
I’m not sure how the sequence of the following moments play out, but the next thing I know, I’m wrapped between my father and Rafael, crying into my dad’s chest. I’m vaguely aware of Marco speaking to the crowd, but I can’t hear him over the sound of my heart thumping.
“I love you, Dad,” I whisper.
“I love you too, Angela.”
When we finally break apart, Rafael nods to him with a sad smile. “Thank you so much, Neal.”
“Just promise you’ll love my grandchildren the same way,” he smiles, making Raf nod.
“Done.”
1.Micaela by Sonora Carruseles, Luis Florez
2.Rainbow by Kacey Musgraves