Chapter 22
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
SKYLAR
Despite my alpha instincts being smothered by the legal limit of rut suppressants—I took two more pills this morning just to be safe—the pain in Riann’s expression twists my chest into a knot. The urge to comfort her is still there, buried under the drug-induced haze.
It’s like a neutral filter has been pulled over the world, mellowing me out, making it almost impossible to feel my alpha instincts, but it’s better this way. We need to discuss the test results, and that’s not possible if I jump on her as soon as she walks through the door.
“I know it’s not what you want to hear, but it’s not the worst thing in the world,” I try to assure her, still careful to keep my distance. If I get too close, I’m worried I might slip up and instigate a repeat of the other day, even with the suppressants.
“This says I can choose,” she says, gripping the paper so hard it crumples. Her eyes are still closed as she takes several deep breaths, her scent spilling into the room as her emotions spike. “I’m choosing. I want to be an omega.”
“It’s not that simple—”
“All I need is a claiming bite.” Her eyes snap open to glare at me, brimming with tears.
The alarm in her voice has me seconds away from gathering her in my arms and wrapping myself around her.
Consequences be damned. I can’t watch her hurt like this.
“Skylar, please, is that all I have to do? I have to fix it…”
Her words come out broken as her breaths quicken.
Just as a sob shakes her chest, I leap off the stool and cross the room, slotting myself between her legs to wrap my arms around her and pull her into my chest. She trembles in my arms, gasping, and I squeeze her tighter.
Even drugged to hell, my alpha instincts take over, and a purr rumbles deep in my chest.
“You’re okay,” I say, my voice low. “I’ve got you, Riann.”
Fuck! This isn’t how the appointment was supposed to go.
“I’m sorry,” she mumbles against me, and I run a hand affectionately over her back, fighting to keep it from wandering.
She needs comfort, not an orgasm, I scold myself. Even buried under so many suppressants, my instincts are still fighting for control.
“Don’t be sorry for how you feel,” I say, my lips dipping to brush the shell of her ear. I just can’t fucking help myself being this close. “It’s a lot to take in, I know.”
She nuzzles her face against my shirt, breathing me in, and I let her. She stops shaking, which is a good sign, but I won’t move until she assures me she’s okay.
And even then I might stay planted firmly between her legs.
“Is that… your distance?” she mutters into my chest, but I can’t parse all the words.
I shift back and hook a finger beneath her chin, tilting her face up. Her makeup is tear-streaked, though her red lips are as perfect as ever.
“Try that again,” I say, forcing a smirk that doesn’t feel real because of the suppressants.
She sighs, her shoulders sagging. “Is that why you were keeping your distance? Because of the results? Because I’m… not an omega?”
“What? No.” I shake my head firmly without breaking eye contact. “I’m trying to be respectful, preciosa. This is a lot to process, and it’ll be even harder if I’m bending you over this table.”
A tiny gasp escapes her lips, her eyes widening.
“I don’t know, that sounds pretty respectful to me.” The sarcasm in her tone is evident, and I’m halfway tempted to flip her over to prove my point.
There’s a pause as we watch one another, the air between us growing thicker.
“Are you okay?” I ask, breaking the silence before we get any ideas, even though I'm trailing a finger along her jaw.
I want nothing more than to curl up with her—hell, we can lie together on the exam table for all I care—but I have so much more to tell her. If I’m going to get through the rest of this appointment, I have to shove aside my personal desires.
She needs a doctor right now, not a horny alpha.
With a nod, she wipes at the makeup beneath her eyes, and I return to my stool.
“I want you to listen to everything I have to say first.” I run a nervous hand through my hair, unsure how she’ll respond to the rest of my findings.
I still don’t know exactly how I feel about the other results; I'm torn between wanting what’s best for myself and caring about what this means for research in general.
“It’s my job to help you make informed decisions, regardless of how I feel about it. ”
There’s much more at stake than a potential relationship between us, despite that being my personal priority. With how rare deltas are, any information we’re able to gather could change the entire field of designation studies.
It could change science forever.
She perks up, straightening on the exam table.
“Okay,” she says. “I’m listening.”
“You’re in a very unique position, something many would kill for. I know a lot of people would love to change their designation, but you can also choose when the change takes place,” I explain carefully. “I’m going to encourage you to take your time. Don’t make any hasty decisions.”
She opens her mouth like she’s going to argue, but a cock of my brow has her closing it again.
“This is a huge opportunity for us to research the delta designation, but once the change is made—as far as we're aware—it’s permanent. We'd no longer be able to study you.” Her lips are drawn tight into a line as she listens. “The Buchanan Center will offer you compensation in exchange for allowing us to study your DNA, and I can start by taking some samples now while you’re here, if you’ll allow it. ”
Her eyes flash with a mix of intrigue and skepticism. “So I would basically get paid to be a lab rat?”
The disappointment in her eyes tugs at something in my chest, but I keep a kind smile on my face.
At least I try to. “It would be a little more glamorous than that. We’ll take as many samples as we can today, but we'd ask you to come back for more tests in the future. You would be doing a huge service for the research community.”
She hesitates, kneading her bottom lip between her teeth. “A huge service… for you?”
As selfish as it feels to admit, I nod.
This is easily the biggest opportunity of my career, and while I hate feeling like I’m using Riann to further my own agenda, I can’t deny how eager I am to advance our knowledge of designations.
There’s no telling what kind of breakthroughs we could make by studying her.
We could uncover more genetic secrets that we’ve never seen.
Maybe even find cures for rare designation-related diseases.
The possibilities nearly have me frothing at the mouth.
“Okay,” she agrees softly, her eyes falling away from mine. “You can take whatever samples you need.”
“Thank you,” I say, hoping my sincerity is conveyed in my voice. I move to stand again. “I’ll have those tests ordered, and we can get that out of the way.”
“Wait…” she says, and I freeze. “How do you know that it’ll work on me? The patient in Brazil bonded with an omega. What if… it doesn’t work the other way around?”
There it is. The question I’ve been avoiding, because I know what will follow.
Still, I can’t keep the information from her. I settle back down on the stool, hands folded in my lap, and take a breath.
“I introduced your DNA to alpha genetic material,” I explain, heat creeping up my neck as I think about everything I’ve done that could have my medical license revoked.
Including mixing my own DNA with Riann’s to see what the outcome would be.
“And after mixing them, your DNA did present with the omega gene.”
Her expression doesn’t change as she registers my answer, but a painful silence settles between us. I shift as everything suddenly feels too tight, the room growing smaller as the pressure increases. Hard conversations have never been my forte.
She tugs her bottom lip between her teeth again, and my eyes immediately shift to her mouth.
The flutter in my stomach turns hot as I recall how amazing her lips felt against mine, and I swallow hard.
I’m going to make it through the rest of this conversation, and then I’m kissing her until neither of us can fucking breathe.
“So, you're saying I can bond to whoever I want?” she asks, sounding skeptical. “And I'll become the designation that complements them?”
“Exactly.”
“And when I do, I’ll be a normal omega?” Hope flickers in her eyes. “I won’t have any more ruts, and my body will function like it’s supposed to?”
“From everything we know, that seems to be the case,” I answer. “According to the center in Rio de Janeiro, the change was permanent, and the patient presented as an alpha afterward.”
A grin spreads across her face, and her shoulders relax. For the first time since I met her—and maybe the moment after she came all over my hand—she looks completely relieved.
I might wait to stuff my tongue down her throat after all.
I’ll give her a few minutes to gather her thoughts and send the nurse in to collect an array of samples. Then, if there’s time before she leaves, I’ll corner her and—
“Skylar,” she says, hopping off the exam table and striding over to where I’m seated on the stool.
Her closeness has my skin prickling with heat, and she’s standing between my legs before I register what’s happening.
“Yes, preciosa?” The words naturally fly out of my mouth, like I’ve said them a thousand times before. She’s a little taller than me in this position, her crystal-blue eyes staring down at me, full of mixed emotions.
Every thought I have shatters as I stare up at her, heat coiling through my center at the lack of space between us.
“Thank you,” she says softly. “I can’t even begin to tell you how thankful I am… This is incredible, really.”
A genuine smile tugs at the corners of my mouth, elation flickering through my drugged-out haze.
“You don’t have to thank me.” I shake my head, reaching out to take her hand. Dragging her closer until she’s flush against me, I breathe in the rush of sugar pouring off her.
“But I do,” she continues, one of her hands reaching up to run her fingers through my hair. I shudder at her gentleness, chills spilling down my back. “You’ve given me more than anyone ever could. The thing I needed most: answers. And I…”
Her voice grows thick with emotion and trails off. Tears well in her eyes again, but I doubt they’re from panic.
Unsure what else to say or do, I stretch my neck up to kiss her. The tension that’s been building in me like water behind a dam bursts, releasing a wave of pine that floods the room as my lips touch hers, and my tongue sweeps eagerly into her mouth.
A moan escapes her, blending with the growl that rolls in my chest. She kisses me back hungrily, her hands exploring my shoulders and brushing along my arms. The last shred of my professionalism snaps when I cup her ass with both hands, squeezing until a gasp falls from her lips.
She arches her back, grinding her ass into my palms.
A switch flips inside me. I don’t care if we get caught.
Fuck it, if anyone sees.
The rut suppressants have clearly dampened my judgement, as well as my instincts, because the only thing I care about is giving Riann exactly what she wants.
And in this moment, what she wants is me.