Chapter 29
TWENTY-NINE
REX
After the wedding that wasn’t, I gave Nigel a few days of peace before reaching out and asking that he meet me for breakfast. After the thing between him and Trevor unraveled and the whole Simon’s been in love with him forever reveal, I’d been concerned about him.
I wasn’t sure if he and Simon were okay.
Or if he and I were okay for that matter.
I’d kept a pretty big secret from him for the stupidest reason possible. Trevor had meant nothing to me and, looking back, there had been no excuse to keep my short-lived past with him from my brother.
Nigel arrived at Bennett’s looking tired but in a good way. His shoulders were back and his head was held high, and the hint of a smile tugged at his mouth. He slid into the booth across from me and ordered a coffee.
“I must say that I’m glad to see you looking so chipper,” I told him, sipping my coffee. “I take it that things between you and Simon have sorted themselves out.”
Nigel’s smile took on a mischievous glint. “You could say that.”
“I’m happy for you. Both of you.”
Nigel raised an eyebrow and leaned back in the booth. He folded his arms over his chest. “I should be super fucking mad at you right now.”
“You have every right to be mad.”
“But I’m not.” Nigel exhaled. “Not really. Yeah, I’m peeved that you didn’t tell me you dated Trevor, even briefly.”
“I thought you were happy.” It was a shit excuse, but it was all I had. “It’s been just you and me for so long, that I didn’t want to risk driving a wedge between us. I never had any feelings for Trevor, so I didn’t think it was important for you to know.”
Nigel let out a sigh and raked his hand through his hair. “Yeah, I know. If I thought you did it for nefarious purposes, I’d be a lot angrier. But why did you lie about having a boyfriend?”
“Because my younger brother was getting married and I wasn’t. It was a dumb flash of sibling rivalry. Besides, I didn’t want him to think that I’d been just laying around pining for him.”
Nigel looked at me for a moment that seemed to stretch into eternity. Ethan came and went with a pot of coffee, promising to be back to take our orders soon. It wasn’t until he was gone that Nigel finally spoke.
“You’re such a dumbass.” Nigel laughed and shook his head. He added two spoons of sugar and a cup of creamer to his coffee before stirring it and taking his first sip.
“I’m aware of this. Have you heard from him at all?”
Nigel shook his head. “Just once when he came to get his things. It was pretty ugly, but Simon was there to have my back, so it was fine.” Nigel shook his shoulders like he was casting off the memory. “So tell me about the guy you brought to the wedding. How’d you meet?”
I was thankful to be past the part of the conversation where we rehashed everything that happened on Nigel’s almost-wedding day.
“He’s friends with Blue. Blue suggested that he’d be a good fake boyfriend.”
“Blue was kind of wrong, though, because he’s not exactly a fake anything now, is he?” Nigel hid his smile behind his coffee cup.
“I’m pretty enamored with him.”
Nigel’s expression softened. “I hope the feeling is mutual.”
“It is,” I answered without hesitation, thinking of how I’d almost been late leaving this morning because Perry had stayed over and I hadn’t wanted to pry myself out of bed.
“I tip my hat to you, big brother. I could never share Simon the way you share Perry.” Nigel lowered his voice to just above a whisper.
“I don’t see it as sharing him, to be honest. It’s his job.
Sure, yes, his job is to have sex with other people, but Perry and I…
it’s more than that.” I was not about to explain to my brother that I found it so fucking hot to know that Perry could have, and in a lot of ways did have, whoever he wanted, and that at the end of the day, I was the person he wanted.
Not Ricky or Billy or whatever their names were.
Their names weren’t important because they weren’t important.
He was mine, and I was his, and no one else mattered.
“So what’s next with you and Simon?” I asked, desperate to take the focus off of me.
“Believe it or not, we’re taking it slow.
” Nigel’s cheeks turned red, and he looked down at his coffee as though it held all the answers.
“We got so much wrong that we want to get this right. But I’ll admit that it’s killing me to take it slow.
” He lifted his gaze and I saw the anguish there.
“I feel like we wasted so much time already.”
“It’s never a waste of time to wait for the right person.”
His frown deepened. Clearly, he wasn’t thrilled with my attempt at an inspirational quote.
I reached for my coffee, which was somehow almost empty now. “Or you could learn from your past and stop keeping things from him. Isn’t that what got you into this situation to begin with?” I raised an eyebrow.
Nigel blinked at me. Once. Then again.
“You’re right.” He perked up in one moment, then deflated in the next. “But how do I say, ‘hey, you know how we agreed to go slow? Well, I don’t want to?’”
“You say it exactly like that. Tell him how you feel, Nigh. How you really feel.”
He nodded once, then changed the subject again. I think he needed time to think about his next move because through the rest of breakfast, he was a lot quieter.
“We need to do this more often, you and I.” Our plates were empty and we stacked them neatly at the edge of the table.
I found that I wasn’t ready to let him leave just yet, not without a promise that we’d see each other again soon.
I didn’t want him to become a ghost in my life again.
Someone who lived so separately from me that he’d gotten close to marrying someone before I even met them.
I hadn’t always been the best at making time for people.
For animals, I always had time. Day or night.
Evenings. Weekends. It didn’t matter to me.
Well, it mattered now. Ever since meeting Perry, I’d been sending a lot more of the emergency work to the larger clinic.
Mine was still a one-man show, but unless I wanted to doom my relationships, sacrifices had to be made.
“I’d like that,” Nigel said. “Same time next month?”
“A month is a long way off.”
“That’s what texting is for, Rex. To bridge the gap.” Nigel pulled his phone out of his pocket and the expression on his face when he looked at the screen was soft and glowing. I’d never seen anyone else ever make him look at his phone that way.
“Go on. Go see your boyfriend, Nigel. And remember to be honest with him.”
Nigel stood so fast he bumped his hip into the edge of the table, making the dishes rattle. He started to reach for his wallet, but I waved him off.
“I’ve got it. You can get the next one.”
“You sure?” he asked even as he tucked his wallet away. “I hate to run, but…”
“Go on. Get. And say hello to him for me.”
Nigel beamed from ear to ear. “I will.” And then he was gone. He was out of there so fast it was almost like he teleported.
With Nigel gone, I paid the bill, left a generous tip, and instead of going home, I found myself at Perry’s apartment, my fist poised to knock again when he whipped the door open, a huge smile on his face.
My heart soared at the sight of him. He was in an old t-shirt and a pair of short shorts that barely peeked out the bottom, displaying his sexy as fuck legs.
The collar of the shirt had been stretched out, and there were little holes in the bottom of the shirt near the hem.
Whatever graphic had been on it at one time had long since faded.
“I thought you were at breakfast with Nigel.” Perry stepped aside to let me in.
“I was. And now I’m here.”
He closed the door then stepped into my personal space, winding his arms around my waist. “I’m glad you’re here. I missed you.”
“I’ve only been gone for a couple hours.” I kissed him anyway. A soft kiss. One that said hello, and I missed you, and I can breathe again.
“A couple hours too long,” he said, looking up at me with those bedroom eyes.
“It was breakfast.”
“It was agony.”
“Maybe next time we can double date and Nigel can bring Simon and I can bring you.”
Perry smiled at me. “I was only teasing. I don’t want to intrude on your time with your brother.”
“I want him to know you. I want the two most important people in my life to know each other.”
Perry slid closer to me, pressing his body against mine. It wasn’t in a sexual way, even though my body responded that way. I ignored my burgeoning erection and just held him. He rested his head on my shoulder and let out a deep breath. “I like the sound of that.”
“You are the most important person in my life,” I repeated, sensing that it was something Perry needed to hear.
He had lived a life that was full of touch and affection, but only a certain kind of touch and affection.
Most of the attention he got as an adult had been sexual in nature and though there was nothing platonic about us, I still liked to just hold him with no expectations.
No ulterior motives. No sexual advances.
Just because our dicks were in close proximity, it didn’t mean they needed to get involved.
Perry took a deep breath and let out a sigh. Unless it was my imagination, he seemed even more relaxed afterward.
“I needed this,” he said, not moving.
“I’ll always give you what you need.” I kissed his head and ran my hand up and down his back. The other one rested comfortably just above the curve of his ass.
“That’s a big promise,” Perry said eventually.
“That’s because my feelings are big feelings.
And they’re serious.” It was too early to ask him for forever, too early to move him into my house, too early for a lot of things, but I was patient.
I’d waited my whole life to meet someone who made me as happy as Perry made me.
I didn’t mind taking our relationship one step at a time.
Perry had never been in a serious relationship before, and I didn’t want to rush things.
I wanted to take my time with him so he got to relish each and every stage of our journey.
“I’d do anything for you, you know that, right?”
“Would you help me hide a body? Theoretically.” Perry had pulled back and was looking me in the eyes now. Searching for any hint of dishonesty.
“I know a guy who has a crematorium. Pretty sure for the right amount of money he’d look the other way.”
“You do not!” He gasped, looking scandalized, even though he was the one who started this conversation.
“Well, he owns a crematorium, but I sort of guessed on the rest. I mean, I assume I could convince him to slip an extra person in there given the right motivation.”
Perry kissed me, half laughing, half almost-horrified-but-secretly-aroused. “Now that’s true love.”
“When I said anything, I meant it.”
He looked up at me, his hands resting on my chest. “Say it again.” His voice was a whisper now, breathy with arousal.
“I’d do anything for you. Anything. Everything.”
Perry’s smile was sweet and pure, and it didn’t match the glint of obvious arousal in his eyes. “You said you’d do anything for me, and yet you’re still not kissing me.”
“My mistake. Please forgive me.”
“Just this once.”
“How generous of you.”
“What can I say, I’m a giver.”
I slanted my mouth over his and shut him up with a kiss. Perry’s hands slid up my back and his fingers sank into my hair.
“Say it again,” he whispered, breaking the kiss. His breaths came heavier now as desire coursed through him.
“Anything,” I said. “Anything and always.”