Chapter 19 #2
“Oh, fuck. I’m sorry,” Jackson said, his face stricken in its own form of terror.
Lilian opened her mouth to say something, but no words came out. The mortification was bone deep. All she could do was stare at the bodice lying on the ground.
Something roared between her ears. Blood, she assumed, but then there was something else as well.
It sounded like shouting. She blinked and realized they were no longer alone in the shop.
Hawk was there, his body standing between her and the men.
Hawk could normally command people with a dismissive arch of the brow or sardonic question, but she’d never seen him scream at someone before.
Margo and Russ were there, too, their touch gentle, as they coaxed her out of the shop, away from the noise. Away from the immediate danger.
“Come ‘ere,” Russ said softly, “let’s get you sorted.”
A small crowd had gathered, people staring the same way one did when an accident happened before their eyes.
It was a relief to step into Russ’s shop. He pulled a heavy curtain over the doorway, hiding them from prying eyes. Something like disbelief bubbled out of Lilian as she realized she’d been desperate for people to come to her shop, to notice her, and now she couldn’t get away fast enough.
No. She clamped down on that thought fast. This is not the same. You need to get it together.
Last week had been a success. She couldn’t step away now. Her shop needed her.
Get back to the shop. You need to make this work.
“I… I’m all right.” The words were difficult to get out. And they definitely didn’t sound all right.
“Are you sure?” Margo’s eyes searched her face; she didn’t look convinced.
Swallowing hard, Lilian put every ounce of confidence she could muster into a response. “I’m sure. But my dress…” She looked down at her underdress. Her fingers holding the fabric still trembled from the shock of what had happened, but she didn’t focus on that.
Russ handed her a plain cream-colored chemise and a blue velvet bodice. “Here, these will get you through the day.”
Lilian took them with an appreciative smile. “Thank you.”
“You can use my changing room.” He nodded toward the small area in the back. It looked the same as her back counter space, but Russ had hung a curtain and used it as a changing room for anyone who might want to try on his creations.
Lilian moved, her limbs feeling numb. Only when she closed the curtain behind her and let her torn dress fall to the ground did the reality of the situation hit her fully.
Her fingers shook as she threw the chemise over her head and laced the bodice.
It took twice as long for her to calm down enough to lace the string.
You’re all right, she told herself. Nothing happened. They were just drunk assholes.
But that didn’t change the fact that one of her two corsets was torn. That she’d nearly been bare-breasted in front of strangers. All she could think about was the leer on their faces as they asked, “Ya ever wanna try out the stuff you read about in those books?”
It wasn’t the first time assholes had made rude comments about the books she enjoyed.
Or even the first time she’d been harassed at the faire.
She was well practiced with responses to shut down anyone who thought they could comment on her private life.
But in that moment, none of it mattered.
When her clothes had been ripped, she froze.
If Hawk hadn’t shown up when he did, she had no idea what she would have done.
A fresh wave of embarrassment hit her at the thought of Hawk.
She must have looked terrible when she stepped out from behind the curtain because Margo let out a soft noise and enveloped her in a tight hug. “Hawk threw those creeps out. It’s all right,” she said.
“I… should talk to him.”
“About what?” Hawk asked, stepping into the store.
Lilian stared. Not because Hawk had magically appeared in the doorway as he always did. But for the first time, his hair was a mess, the buttons of his shirt were askew. He looked… disheveled. And then she realized she didn’t know what she wanted to say to him. Everything had happened so fast.
When she didn’t say anything, he took pity and spoke first. “Those two won’t bother you again. I’m sorry that happened.”
“You didn’t have anything to do with it.” Slowly she pushed herself out of the chair. “I should get back to the shop.”
All three bodies stepped forward in an orchestrated movement, blocking her exit. “You don’t have to go anywhere,” Margo said firmly. “Except maybe home. I can run the shop today.”
“What? No, I’m fine. Really.”
Margo’s face remained stern, but her eyes dipped down to Lilian’s hands, which still had a slight tremble to them.
Okay, so maybe she wasn’t fine.
“I’ll drive you home,” Hawk said. He was staring at her hands as well. Dammit.
“What about my car?”
“It’ll be fine overnight,” Margo assured. “I’ll drive you back tomorrow to get it.”
Hesitation thrummed through her body, even as she was guided out of the shop and led to the parking lot. Her body was still numb. Her mind buzzed with some strange white noise that kept repeating itself. What if… what if… what if…
She knew logically those men hadn’t meant to rip her bodice. And then she felt silly for defending them. The mortification still chilled her body. Like it all happened to someone else.
Hawk helped her into his truck, and together, they drove away. He didn’t say anything, and she appreciated it, but the memory of his angry face burned against the back of her eyelids.
“To your house?” he asked when they neared the exit.
Lilian blinked out of her thoughts, coming back to herself. “No,” she said quickly, “my parents will ask questions, and I’m not…”
Hawk nodded. “Where to?”
She knew, without asking, that he would take her anywhere she wanted. But only one place came to mind. “Your place?”
Out of the corner of her eye, she studied his expression. Trying to determine if the request was out of line. If he saw it as the desperate plea for company that it was. In asking for his place, she was asking for him to stay with her. To be away from the faire.
Hawk didn’t bat an eye. “Of course.”
They drove past the exit, continuing on their way to Manhattan.
It meant something that he was being so considerate.
Driving her, asking if she wanted him to take her home.
He was treating her with more care than she’d experienced with any man.
As the silence dug its claws into the space between them, she felt the inexplicable need to reassure him back.
“I’m really all right,” she said, “just a little in shock.”
“I can imagine.” His voice was rough, like it caught on sandpaper. “That shouldn’t have happened today. I’ll have a talk with my dad.”
“It’s fine. Really. There are assholes every year.”
His grip tightened on the steering wheel. “Then we aren’t taking the right precautions.”
“Hawk…” She sighed, too tired to argue.
He got the hint and fell quiet. Soon he was pulling off into Manhattan, passing the streets bustling with weekend traffic.
A football game was going on, and the town was a sea of purple and black as families tailgated.
Hawk took a back road to avoid traffic. Before long, they pulled into his apartment.
The inside was as clean and untouched as it had been a few weeks ago. Hawk put his keys on the small hanger by the door and started for the kitchen. “Are you hungry?”
Eat. That was right. She’d missed her lunch break, and in the rush of everything, her appetite was absent.
“I missed lunch,” she said, more an observation for herself than anything else.
“Want me to make you a sandwich?” Hawk asked, standing in the kitchen poised and ready to cook. “You can borrow my clothes, get dressed in something more comfortable.”
Oh yeah. She looked down at the outfit Russ had provided. It wasn’t too revealing, but the need to change into something more comfortable… more modern, pulled at her senses. She needed to forget about the faire, just for a little while.
“Thanks.”
He showed her to his bedroom, where he handed her an oversized K-State shirt and a pair of shorts he claimed were too small for him. When the door closed behind him, she was finally, blessedly alone.
She braced herself for the memories to rush back. For the need to cry to overwhelm her the way it almost had in the changing room.
But the fear was gone.
The anxiety was still there, but that, she knew, was for a different reason.
She was in Hawk’s house. And this time, it felt different.
Before, they’d still been unsure of what they meant to each other.
Now, they were here because she needed him.
Because she’d asked. It was a gift. A gift of protection.
Of strength. And she knew that was the reason she was able to hold herself together now.
Lilian pulled on the shorts. They were big, but after rolling the waist, she managed to fit them against her hips. The soft fabric of the T-shirt was like a warm hug after the day she’d had. A hug that smelled like Hawk.
When she stepped back out, a spread of sandwich toppings covered his counters: cheese, lettuce, tomatoes, mustard, and ranch waited for her. Hawk was already biting into his sandwich, but he paused midchew to stare at her.
Lilian gave a cursory look down at her outfit. It was big, but she didn’t think it looked terrible. When she glanced back up, he was studying the second sandwich that sat on the plate.
“Um… I didn’t know how you wanted your sandwich.”
“I’m not picky.” She took a seat at the island. “Thanks for letting me stay here.”
“It’s not a problem.” Hawk didn’t meet her gaze. The sandwich was more important.
That was okay, she didn’t really want to talk about it either.
Let’s move on.
“I’m feeling much better,” she assured him. “I’ll be back at the faire tomorrow. I have to be, the show is on. And I don’t want to lose the momentum from the last couple weeks.”