Chapter 22
Harper
The kitchen smelled like roasted garlic and simmering stock, the kind of warm, comforting scent that never failed to anchor me. Kevin was at the stove, coaxing sauce through a sieve with careful precision, while I finished plating the risotto we’d been experimenting with together.
“This is really good, Kevin.” I lifted the spoon to my lips for another taste. “You’ve really got something here.”
“You mean we have something here.” He joined me at the counter and picked up a spoon of his own. “This was a joint effort, and you know it.” He took a bite. “But damn, you’re right. It’s spot-on.”
We each allowed ourselves another bite before Kevin took the plate out to the dining room for Erin to try.
“You know,” he said when he returned, “I did enjoy the collaboration with you today, but I want to make sure you don’t think I need the interference.
” He wiped his hands on the towel tied to his apron.
“Are you happy with what I’m doing here so far, Harper? ”
“Oh, yes.” I set my knife down and looked up at him.
“I’m sorry if I gave you any other impression, Kevin.
You’ve been great. The way you’ve jumped in and handled things has been amazing.
And you are really talented.” I stopped myself just short of gushing, aware that I didn’t want to overdo the praise.
Truthfully, he was doing a fantastic job, but I was self-aware enough to see how he might feel a bit micromanaged in the last few days.
“That’s good to hear.” He nodded and smiled at me. “I just wanted to be sure.”
“I know I’ve been around the kitchen a little more in the last few days, but I promise, it has nothing to do with the job you’ve been doing.
And everything to do with…” I stopped myself from oversharing.
I didn’t expect that my fight with Grayson was a secret, especially considering we’d had it in pretty as much as public a place as possible.
But secret or not, I didn’t feel like rehashing anything with Kevin.
Or anyone.
“I’ve just had a few things to work out,” I said instead, letting him fill in the blanks. “And I don’t know about you, but the kitchen has always been a soothing place for me.”
“I get that.” He nodded. “A good kitchen will have that effect, and this is a very good kitchen.”
He was right about that. It was a very good kitchen.
I’d spent the last few days immersing myself in the routine of chopping, stirring, and creating, and it was making me feel better.
At least until I left my apron behind and returned to the real world.
As soon as I stepped beyond the swinging doors, reality—and the pain of everything that came with it—rushed back.
“Truthfully, Kevin, I’ve actually decided that I’ll be staying in town a little bit longer.
” I spoke the words in a rush before I could change my mind.
“I don’t want you to think that means there won’t be a job here for you.
Quite the opposite, really. But I know I told you that I’d be leaving and you’d have free run of things here. ”
“It’s fine.” He laughed and held up his hand. “In fact, I think it’s great that you’re staying.”
“You do?” I tilted my head and examined him closely, but there was no sign of insincerity.
“Really. You being here lifts everyone,” he said. “I’ve really noticed it. The staff, the customers…Willa. You bring a good vibe, Harper. I think it’s great if you’re staying longer.”
I swallowed hard, trying to absorb his easy acceptance when I still hadn’t fully reconciled it for myself. “We’ll see how it goes.”
“You are going to stay?”
I turned to see that Grandma had slipped into the kitchen behind me. Her scarf in her hands, her purse hanging off her arm, she watched me in that quiet, knowing way of hers. The way that always made me feel like she could read every thought I was trying to hide.
“I told you that at Christmas, Grandma.” I walked to her and led her to the chair in the corner by the prep table. “Don’t tell me you forgot?” Alarm bells sounded in my brain. Was she starting to forget on top of everything else?
“I remember.” She swatted me away and set her purse on the table. “I just wasn’t sure if you’d changed your mind after everything that happened.”
I tipped my head and examined her.
“Don’t stay because you think you owe me something, Harper,” she continued. “Stay for yourself, if you stay at all.”
“Why wouldn’t I stay?”
“I think I’m going to go see how Erin liked that risotto,” I heard Kevin say from behind me before slipping out the door, leaving Grandma and me alone.
“Why wouldn’t I stay, Grandma?” I asked her again. My chest tightened around the knot that never seemed to fully go away these days.
Her gaze softened. “I saw the fight in the plaza, Harper. Everyone did. Or they heard about it.”
Heat rose to my cheeks, shame mingling with grief. Of course she’d seen it. I wasn’t surprised. Not really. Only that she hadn’t said anything until now. She’d let me sit with sadness for the last few days while I tried to work it out for myself. “I’m sorry, Grandma. I didn’t mean for that—”
“Nonsense.” She waved away my apology. “Don’t worry about what people saw. It doesn’t matter. What matters is—”
“No.” I stopped her. “I’m sorry because I lied to you.
” I blew out a heavy breath. It was long past time I confessed the truth.
“Grayson and me. It was never real. I convinced him to pretend that we were back together for the holidays. I knew how happy it would make you if you thought that I was…well, it doesn’t matter.
It was a stupid idea and I never should have lied to you like that.
” I looked into her eyes, but they gave nothing away.
After a moment, she frowned, disappointment threading through the lines of her face. “Why would you do that, Harper?”
“You said you were sick and…”
“And you wanted me to have one last happy Christmas before I kicked the bucket.”
It wasn’t a question; still, I nodded. “I guess I just didn’t want you to worry about me.”
She dropped her gaze for a moment. “No,” she said finally. “I don’t believe that.” Before I could open my mouth to object, she continued. “I don’t believe you’d put yourself and him through such an elaborate lie if there wasn’t at least a part of you that wanted it to be more.”
Her words pierced straight through me.
“Besides,” she said. “You’re not a good liar. You never were.”
The lift in her voice stopped me. “Excuse me?”
“And as far as acting goes, Harper…” She clucked her tongue. “It’s not your strength.”
My mouth fell open. “So, what you’re saying is that you knew we were pretending the whole time?”
“I didn’t say that,” she said matter-of-factly. “But I’m also not saying that.”
I blinked, trying to make sense of what she was saying. But she continued before I could follow up.
“What I’m saying is that I don’t think you’ve been acting at all.” She reached across the table and took my hand in hers. “Not about how you feel about him.”
I shook my head, fighting the sting in my eyes.
Her simple assessment was so accurate, it threatened to undo me.
“It doesn’t matter now anyway,” I said quickly.
“Whatever it was, it’s over. I…he…” I waved my hand in the air.
“I’m staying, though,” I added. “That’s what matters now.
So, don’t worry. I’ll find a way to be happy here. In the kitchen, without…”
“Harper.” Grandma squeezed my hand. “This isn’t your burden to carry,” she said softly.
“You know I want you to stay, if that’s what you want.
You can make this place your own, whatever you want that to look like.
But if it’s not what you want, we’ll let it go.
Life is too short to be spent chasing the wrong dream. ”
My throat tightened. I wanted to tell her that I’d already learned that, but the words stuck in my throat. Instead, I nodded and muttered, “Thank you, Grandma.”
She gave me one more smile and pushed up from her seat, adjusting the scarf around her neck and hooking her purse over her arm again.
“Are you going out?”
“Don’t you worry about me,” she said. “I have a few errands to do this afternoon.”
“Let me grab my coat. I’ll—”
“No, no.” She waved me off. “I’ve already got someone lined up to take me. I know you have other things to worry about.”
“Let me guess.” I forced a smile of my own. “Tilley?”
“Try not to work too hard.” Grandma ignored my question. “I’ll see you later, dear.”
And then she was gone, leaving me in the warm kitchen with the weight of her words echoing in my head.
I’d been so focused on helping Grandma keep what she had that I’d never considered the possibility of turning Willa’s Whisk into something new. Something mine.
But as I looked around the familiar kitchen, for the first time, I saw it in a different light. One that sent a spark of excitement through me.
Grayson
I never should have agreed to this.
Of all the things I could be doing with my time, playing chauffeur to Harper’s grandma was not exactly at the top of my list. Not when every second in Willa’s company reminded me sharply of her granddaughter.
But the truth was, I never could say no to Willa Bennett.
Or anyone in this town, really.
I held open the passenger door as she settled into the seat.
“Such a gentleman,” Willa said with a grin.
I certainly didn’t feel like a gentleman as I closed the door gently and moved around to the driver’s seat.
“Your vehicle is always so clean,” Willa commented as soon as I pulled out of the parking spot. “You know, I’d say that you really are Trickle Creek’s best Uber driver, Grayson.”
Despite myself, I smiled and shook my head. “I’m pretty sure Uber drivers get paid, Willa.”
We both knew I wasn’t about to accept any payment from her, or anyone else. Of course, if the new owners of the hardware store brought in their own management, I’d be without a job, and maybe driving the elderly around town would soon become more than just a volunteer activity.
“No need to frown, Grayson,” Willa said, easily detecting the shift in my mood. “I’ll be sure to give you a generous tip or recommend another thank-you gift from the festival committee.”
The playful tone in her voice caught me by surprise. I whipped my head around and narrowed my eyes in question. “What are you talking about? Did you have something to do with the gift certificate for the lodge, Willa?”
She shrugged innocently, but there was nothing innocent about the sly little smile on her lips.
“Willa.”
“Grayson.” She pressed her lips together and spoke firmly. “There’s nothing wrong with giving a valuable volunteer a generous thank-you gift,” she said. “Besides, I thought maybe the two of you could use a little alone time during such a busy season.”
My heart squeezed and immediately steeled. “You didn’t have to do that, Willa,” I said through gritted teeth.
“I know.” She turned to face out the windshield again. “You know, you’ve always been the dependable one, Grayson. Always the first to show up. To fix things. To volunteer whenever anyone needed a helping hand.”
I shrugged, my hands tightening on the wheel. “Someone has to.”
“Sure.” Her voice was warmer now, but sharper too. “But when does somebody show up for you?”
The shift in conversation took me off guard. I glanced over at her. “Pardon me?”
“I mean it,” Willa continued, as if I hadn’t questioned her. “When do you get to let yourself want something?”
My chest clenched. I didn’t have an answer, not one I could share with her, anyway. I couldn’t tell Harper’s grandmother that I had allowed myself to want something. Someone. And it had just left me with a broken heart. So what was the point?
But I couldn’t say any of that, especially considering she must know that Harper and I had broken up or had a fight or whatever it was we were supposed to call it.
Instead, I said nothing, staring at the road, gripping the wheel harder as I navigated the streets through town.
The silence stretched between us until I pulled up at the front of the library. Willa gathered her purse, but hesitated before she opened the door. I was about to hop out and open the door for her, but she stopped me with a gentle touch on my arm.
“You know, Grayson, you deserve more than just being the man who makes everyone else’s life easier,” she said softly. “I hope you realize that before it’s too late.”
And then she was gone, walking carefully toward the entrance, leaving me alone with my thoughts while she browsed the shelves.
I leaned back against the seat, staring through the windshield without really seeing the snowy street in front of me.
She wasn’t wrong. Not entirely. But she wasn’t right either.
I had let myself want for something.
Harper.
It was always Harper. It had always been Harper I wanted. But where had that gotten me?
It always ended the same way. With her walking away and leaving me alone, wanting.
And the store. I’d wanted that, too.
I blew out a rough breath, shaking my head.
Wanting had already cost me too much.
And now, there wasn’t anything left to lose.