Chapter 24 Maverick
maverick
The flames of the fire flicker over the meat, and when I rotate the metal skewer, the bottom of the hot dogs are blistered and burnt.
“Damn, Hall.” Gabe slings his arm over my shoulder and points his beer can at the charred meat. “I said I liked my dogs toasted, not cooked to dust.”
“You don’t have to worry about it because we didn’t bring enough for you anyway. You get mustard for dinner.” I shove him off me and take a glance over my shoulder. Savannah’s eyes are rolling but it’s the giggle Chloe is hiding behind her solo cup that distracts me.
Silas holds out a plate prepared with buns, and I drop the sausages burnt side down into them.
“Take a break, buddy,” he mumbles with a pat on my back. “We’ll give these ones to Gabe and Parker, and I’ll make the rest.”
I make my way to the chair next to Chloe as she holds out her hand and begins crossing something off her invisible paper.
“What are you doing?”
“Crossing professional chef off your list.”
“To be fair, I think a bonfire just has a different temperament than an electric stove.”
She laughs that rich, deep, full laugh of hers, and it hits me square in the chest.
A flash catches my eye, and I peel my gaze away from Chloe to find Savannah lowering the camera. She gives us a toothy grin before shaking the Polaroid and heading over to the picnic bench with Noah.
Chloe shakes her head with another small laugh as she pulls her legs up and tucks them beneath the blanket on her lap.
The fire keeps steady, and when the wind shifts, it’s not the flames that alert me. “Did you switch lotions?” I ask without thinking.
“What?”
“You just always smell like lavender, and now—” I lean in, trying to make out what the difference is, but it’s all wrong. “You don't."
“Oh.” Her brow furrows slightly, and I want to throttle myself for saying anything. She probably thinks I’m a fucking psycho for noticing. “No. I just forgot my lotion and had to borrow some from Sav.”
I purse my lips with a nod and look away, trying to appear as nonchalant as possible. Silently begging her to ignore the fact that I picked up on something like that.
“Is it bad?”
“No. It’s just not you.”
Last night, we stayed up so late that by the time we climbed into the tent, there wasn’t enough time to worry about how close we were.
As soon as our heads hit the pillows, we were out.
Tonight, though, the space feels claustrophobic.
We lie on our backs beside each other, the silence stretching loud between us.
My fingers brush against the back of her hand, and she immediately shifts, resting it on her stomach.
“Are you trying to make a move?” she asks, her voice light, and I hear her smile even though I can't see it in the dark.
I exhale, feeling relieved that she didn’t pull away completely. “No. Not unless you want me to.”
She laughs softly. “I don’t think that was in the rules.”
“And without rules,” I say, keeping my tone playful, “we’re just animals, right?”
“Right,” she agrees, still amused.
My chest rumbles with a quiet laugh as my eyes finally adjust to the darkness and the shape of her beside me. “That’s probably best. It’s been so long, I can’t guarantee it wouldn’t be a disappointment anyway.”
I meant it as a joke, but the silence that follows suddenly feels too quiet.
“Has it?” she asks, no longer teasing. “I mean, has it been a while since you—”
She doesn’t finish, but she doesn’t need to.
I let out a breath as I close my eyes. “Yeah, Chloe, I haven’t been with anyone since you stormed in on me naked in the locker room.
” I haven’t been with anyone since weeks prior to that event either.
I think back to the parties when I had Kat in my lap all night, then kissing Laney in the hallway, but both nights, thoughts of Chloe were too heavy in my mind to do anything.
She doesn’t need to know all of that, though.
“I know you’re probably thinking that must be hard for me.”
“Not really.”
“Hockey player. Chews gum. Playboy, right?”
“That’s not all I think about you.”
Her response, mixed with the quiet rustle of her head twisting on the pillow case, pulls me onto my side to face her. I don’t say anything, I just let her look at me. She never shies away, and even when it begins to feel like she’s cutting me open, and I want to bolt, I remain still.
“No?”
She tucks her bottom lip between her teeth with the smallest shake of her head, and I want to reach over and rest my thumb there.
“I mean, I’ve been curious why you don’t date, but…” She shrugs, sliding her hands under her cheek. “But you said you haven’t found someone you want to commit to yet, and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that.”
I’m thrown off by her words until I remember the night I did say that. It was a lie then and it’s a lie now.
“Most people think that I just want to hook up.”
“I’m not most people.”
Don't I know it.
I prop my head up onto my hand. “Why?”
“Why what?” she whispers.
“Why don’t you assume the worst of me?”
“I think the better question is, why do you let people assume the worst about you?”
Goddamn. I’ve spent years letting people talk. I let them paint me as whoever they want.
But Chloe…Chloe has never looked at me like she sees my reputation. She’s never fallen for the version that everyone buys, and for the first time, that part of myself I keep closed off wants to be seen. If only by her.
I reach over, running my middle finger from the crown of her head, down the side of her heart-shaped face. “Chlo…”
Her lips part, but she doesn’t pull away.
Not for the first time, we’re alone with absolutely no excuse to kiss her other than my burning need. My hand slides along her neck, thumb brushing the soft skin at the base of her throat, and her pulse hammers wildly beneath it.
I lean in just an inch, and that’s all it takes. Her chest meets mine on a shaky inhale, and the space between us pulls taught. Her eyes dip to my mouth, and it’s all the confirmation I need. My hand flexes and I steal one last breath, only to freeze when her phone vibrates.
The sound that’s normally so faint, slices through the tent, startling us both. I drop my hand, roll over onto my back, and stare up at the tent ceiling, confident that one more almost kiss with her might kill me.
After a moment, she sits up, and her inhale is audible.
“Everything okay?”
“Yeah,” she whispers. “Yeah. I just need some air.”
By the time I sit up, she’s already unzipped the tent and taken off.
I’m not self-centered enough to assume she was so affected by what almost happened that she needed to leave, but I’m also not delusional enough to assume she wasn’t.
I’m about to lie back down when the vibrating sounds again, and this time, a soft glow fills the tent.
Normally, my immediate reaction would be to ignore it.
I stick to my business, and let everyone handle theirs, but what I can’t ignore is the heavy lead feeling in the pit of my stomach.
When it lights up once more, I lose my battle of wills and pick it up.
Two hidden messages from Nathan glare back at me from the screen, and the lead that was filling my stomach rises to my throat.