Chapter Twenty-four Summer
Chapter Twenty-four
Summer
Silas left. My teammates are looking at me the same way they did months ago, like they can’t trust me.
There’s ten minutes left and we’re down by one.
It’s a miracle it isn’t more. And it’s all my fault.
I’ve made more errors than I have in the rest of the season combined.
Not to mention the stunt before the game seems to have shaken everyone.
I don’t know how much they heard, but the way Amanda won’t look at me says they heard the important things.
I dribble into the defense, trying to draw the defenders to me with the intent to pass to Sophie on the right, but I’m picked off by a sophomore from Oakley who is frankly not good enough to be giving me trouble.
I growl in frustration. I’m saved only by the girl losing control and kicking a long pass wide and out of bounds.
Coach calls a time-out, and I walk to the sideline filled with embarrassment and shame.
“Rina, sub in for Summer,” Coach says, not meeting my gaze.
I open my mouth to protest but think better of it. The team is probably better off without me today. Even the Oakley girls are giving me pitying looks.
I make the tragic mistake of glancing up at Coach Endrews. She has an unimpressed scowl on her face as she stands and walks down the bleachers. I continue watching her even as she turns and heads for the parking lot, taking my dreams of playing for FLU along with her.
I can’t believe it. Everything I want is right here and slipping through my fingers. All because of stupid Silas.
Rowan’s still here, but he’s not his usual self, cheering loudly and smiling. I’m not sure if he’s upset or if I’m just not giving him anything to cheer about. Honestly, probably both.
On the very next possession, Amanda kicks in a rebound to tie up the game. My teammates cheer on the field, hugging one another, then refocusing on defense.
The momentum shifts without me out there screwing things up. Within another minute, we’ve scored again. Oakley is struggling now that we’re playing like we can. Not we. They. I sit out for the rest of the game.
We shake hands with Oakley. Charlotte and Jill both spend a few seconds longer with me, hugging me and assuring me everything is going to be fine. Then I follow my teammates off the field. Rowan’s nowhere to be seen. That might sting worse than anything else that’s happened today.
The mood in the locker room is celebratory, but when Amanda is done congratulating everyone else, she walks over to me.
“Is it true?” she asks.
“Amanda, I—”
“It’s a simple question. Were you and Rowan faking it to make me jealous or not?”
The conversations die off, and I can feel all eyes on us.
I swallow around the lump in my throat. “Yes.”
Immediately there’s a quiet, shocked murmur, and I know that whatever trust I’d gained is now lost.
“He wanted you back, and I wanted to fit in with the team.”
She scoffs, then laughs and shakes her head. “You will never fit in on this team. No matter what desperate attempts you make. You proved where your loyalty lies today. And it’s not with us.”
* * *
Silas is sitting in the living room watching TV with Dad when I get home.
Dad grabs his cane and gets to his feet. “I think I’ll see if your mother needs any help with the laundry.”
“Real subtle, Dad,” Silas mutters.
Dad squeezes my shoulder as he passes by me.
“I’m so mad at you,” I say as I stand in the doorway.
“You’re mad at me?” He sits tall. “That’s rich, considering you lied to me.”
“Oh, get over yourself. I did not.”
“You said you were only faking it.”
“We were.” I throw my hands up in the air in exasperation.
“That didn’t look like faking to me. Come on, Sum. I’m not stupid.”
“Things changed. Just because you’re not around anymore and don’t bother to call to check in doesn’t make me a liar.”
“Uh-uh. You didn’t tell me because you knew I’d be pissed.”
That’s maybe true, but him causing a scene today only proves I was right not to say anything.
“So what? I don’t have to run my decision by you.”
“Come on, Sum. Rowan Blakenship?” The way he says Rowan’s name is full of disdain.
“You don’t even know him.”
“Sure I do. And even if I didn’t, the shit he pulled, using you to win back his ex, is enough to tell me all I need to know.”
“He was helping me too! You’re twisting it to make him the bad guy because you don’t like him. God. Do you have any idea what you did today? You ruined everything.”
“I’m sorry, but what did you expect me to do when I show up to surprise my little sister and she’s getting handsy with Rowan fucking Blakenship?”
“Did you know that the FLU women’s soccer coach was there today?”
I can tell by his expression that he didn’t.
“Yeah. Goodbye, dream college. And thanks to you, my teammates hate me again, so it’s unlikely that any other college coach is going to bother coming to see me.”
“You lied to me,” he says in response but with a little less anger in his tone.
“No, I didn’t.” I take a seat in the chair across from him. “We were faking it. We just aren’t anymore.”
Silas arches a dark brow.
“Don’t give me that look. He’s different than you think.”
“Unlikely,” he mutters.
“I don’t care what you think,” I say, which isn’t exactly true. But I’m so mad at him. “Why are you even here? I thought you weren’t coming home until the end of the semester.”
“Excuse me for visiting.” He stands. “Jesus. That asshole is already rubbing off on you. I told you if things went bad, you’d be the one to pay the cost. He fucked you over just like I predicted.”
Silas leaves me fuming in the living room. Hot tears sting the back of my eyelids.
Everything is so fucked.