17. Orson
17
Orson
I can’t help but watch her dance. Yes, there is a part of me that is wondering about the conversation they’re having, but honestly, it’s more the fact that I can’t keep my eyes off her.
When Lily walked into the living area earlier, every single cell of my body sparked, and a strange sensation hit me in the chest. I tried to be as courteous as I could, but telling her she looked beautiful was probably the understatement of the year. It took everything I had not to stride across the room and kiss her.
The dance comes to an end, and I can see Pops and Lily heading back toward me. Pops looks contemplative, but Lily looks peeved. I can feel anger rising.
What did he say to her?
“Here we are,” Pops says, handing Lily back to me. “Thank you, Lily. You’ve made an old man very happy.”
She smiles back at him, but it’s strained. I reach for her and pull her into me again, wanting her to know that I’m here for her, whatever happened.
“Thank you, Mr. Donovan,” she says.
“Arthur, please.”
“Arthur,” she repeats.
“I’m sure I will see you before you leave tomorrow, Orson,” Pops says.
It’s a statement, not a question. We’re staying over at the estate tonight, and I have no doubt I’ll be summoned at some point.
“Probably,” I say, with the enthusiasm of a snail.
Pops smirks at me before turning and walking away. Once he’s out of earshot, I bend my mouth to Lily’s ear. “Are you all right?”
“I think I could do with some air,” she says.
Taking her hand, I lead her through the throngs of people. We reach a set of French doors that open out onto the terrace, but once outside, I don’t stop there. Walking down the concrete steps, I lead her across the lawn and around the corner of the house, the music softly fading the farther we go.
Eventually, we reach the gardens at the back of the house. Of course, they’re immaculately manicured and perfect, just like everything else around here. The night air is crisp, carrying the scent of blooming jasmine, and once I know we’re completely alone, I slow my pace and turn to her.
“Are you all right?”
She drops her gaze and doesn’t answer. I have to hand it to her; she’s held her composure and her nerve all night. But now, I can see her coming slightly undone with the pressure of it all.
“Lily?”
She looks up at me then, her eyes glistening with unshed tears, her vulnerability taking me completely by surprise.
“You were right. Your grandfather is a tyrant.”
“What did he say?” I ask carefully.
Lily begins walking, and I walk beside her. “He told me the reason he sent you back to Willow Creek.”
I take a deep breath in and slowly release it. I’ve lied to her all this time about that. I never imagined that Pops would have told her, but now she knows.
“He said you ran away as a child and that the Donovans don’t tolerate cowards,” she continues. “But I told him that you weren’t a coward. That in fact, it took a lot of courage for you to come back to Willow Creek and face all those people who had tormented you for so long.”
I can’t help but feel a huge sense of pride in her, standing up to Pops like that. He’s a pretty formidable character.
“I’ll bet he loved that,” I say.
“Why would he make you do such a thing?” she cries. “It’s awful. It’s more than awful. It’s just cruel. In fact, why did your parents let you suffer at all? They must have known what was going on.”
I shrug. “I don’t know. They weren’t really around much when I was younger.”
She looks up at me then. “What do you mean?”
“They traveled a lot. They have different charities they support. They fly all over the world as ambassadors of this cause or that cause. It’s the reason they’re not here tonight.”
“And what about their son? Was he not a cause they should have been supporting?” she says, sounding angry.
And then I realize why she’s so upset. It’s not just what my grandfather said. She’s angry at what my family did to me back then.
“Lily, it doesn’t matter anymore.”
“It matters to me,” she comes back. “For years, I watched those kids bully you, mock you, torment you. I always wished I could do something, but I was just a kid myself. Your mom and dad could have done something. Instead, they just let you suffer.”
I can hear her voice breaking, and I stop and turn to look at her. When she looks back, there are tears trickling down her cheeks.
“Lily,” I gasp.
I take her by the shoulders and pull her into my chest, wrapping my arms around her tightly. Her body shudders as she sobs a little, and while every instinct in me wants to stop the tears, I let them flow.
Being a friend of a psychologist teaches you about the human mind, not least of which is a bit of knowledge about relieving stress. I know Lily is upset about what happened to me as a kid, but I think the other part of these tears is the pressure I’ve put her under tonight.
“I’m sorry you had to do this,” I say softly. “I shouldn’t have asked you to come.”
“Why?” she sniffles.
“Because I’ve asked too much of you.”
Lily shakes her head and steps away. She retrieves a tissue from her purse and dabs her eyes. “But then I wouldn’t have been able to wear this ludicrously expensive and equally fantastic dress,” she says, laughing through the last of her tears.
I smile down at her. “That’s true. And it does look rather fantastic on you.”
She gazes up at me, and I gaze back. My heart is thumping like a drum, and my pulse is racing. I want to kiss her so badly, but I don’t know if it’s what she wants. And yet, as we stand here, not a foot apart, I can feel the sparks flying between us.
Just ask her, you idiot.
“Would you mind if I kissed you?” I say, my voice even deeper than normal.
Lily continues to gaze up at me, and without words, she shakes her head.
Taking hold of her cheek, I lower my lips to hers. They feel soft beneath mine, and as she pulls me in closer, every cell of my body sparks. My heart races, my blood pumps through my veins, and in this serene moment, there’s clarity.
The lines have been getting blurry for the last couple of weeks. What started out as a business contract has morphed into something more, and now, the lines are nearly erased altogether. I’m a man who hasn’t made time for relationships. I’m a man who has always been too busy for such complications. At least, I was until Lily came along.
Slowly, I pull away from her, and I hear a slight gasp leave her lips. I’m feeling breathless myself, and even now, I can’t stop looking at her. She really is the most beautiful thing in my life.
I take her hand in mine, and we turn and begin walking again. Neither of us speaks for quite a while, and then I hear Lily heave a huge sigh.
“That bad, huh?” I joke.
She grins up at me and shakes her head. “This just feels so surreal. I wish my father were alive. He’d freak to know that I came to a gala at the Donovans’ estate.”
“He didn’t like my family either then?”
“Actually, Dad wasn’t like that. He was a simple man, a smart man, but he liked simplicity in his life. He had his bakery, his family, and his cabin up at the lake where he went fishing, and that was all he needed.”
“Did you always want to take over the business?” I ask.
“Since I was about ten years old.”
I smile. “I remember when Jenny used to come into the bakery on a Saturday. If I was with her, I’d always see you helping your dad.”
“I remember that, too,” Lily says excitedly. “I always thought that was your mom.”
I shake my head. “No, that was my nanny when I was younger.”
“Did you always want to go into the family business?” she says, asking me the same question.
“No. When I was a kid, I wanted to…” I hesitate, and Lily looks up at me.
“What?”
I lift my eyebrows. “You’re going to laugh.”
“No, I’m not.”
I give her a knowing look and then shrug. “I wanted to join the circus.”
I can see her struggling to hold her face straight. She’s biting down on her bottom lip, and her eyebrows are high on her head.
“I told you, you’d laugh.”
“I’m not laughing,” she says, seriously struggling to hold back a giggle. “So, what was it about the circus that enticed you?” she splutters. “Was it the big-footed clowns, or the huge elephants? I mean, we all know how much you like your huge elephants.”
At this point, Lily can’t stop herself, and she bursts into laughter. I mean, full-on hysterics, which, in my opinion, is far better than her tears earlier. I don’t want to tell her now that it was the thought of escape. That I wanted to join the circus to run away from my life. It’ll ruin the moment and bring down the mood. I like hearing her laughter, so I make a quip that will keep her entertained.
“Actually, it was the bearded lady. I like a woman with a full face of hair.”
This only makes her laugh more, and a second later, I’m laughing with her. If anyone saw us, they’d think we’d gone mad, but I don’t care. Lily is happy, and that’s all that matters.
Eventually, we go back inside. I don’t want to, and I’m not sure Lily does, either. We’re having far too much fun on our own. But I suppose I have to show my face, given that it is my family home.
We don’t rush back, though, and I take her on a tour of the house first. I show her the library, the family dining room, the drawing rooms—in fact, all the places where we can still be alone. The truth is, I don’t want to share her with anyone. I want her all to myself.
Eventually, we meander back into the ballroom, where the music is still playing, and the sound of conversation and laughter carries on the air.
I turn to her and say, “My grandfather took the privilege before I got a chance to ask, but would you like to dance with your husband?”
“I would love to dance with my husband,” she replies, beaming up at me.
I lead her to the dance floor, and wrapping my arm around her waist, I pull her in close. We sway gently from side to side, and I feel like the proudest man in the room. I’ve seen the glances Lily has gotten from other men, but she’s with me, and it makes me feel happy.
Lily gazes up at me with a contemplative look.
“What is it?” I ask.
“I’m just thinking. This is our first dance as a married couple.”
How ironic that it’s in my family home, of all places.
“Indeed, it is.”
I gaze down at her with a strange realization. It suddenly occurs to me that I don’t want this to be fake anymore. But this isn’t the time or place to say it, so instead, I say, “I hope it won’t be our last.”