Chapter 31 Lincoln
LINCOLN
I fiddled with the tiny box in my hand before I flipped it open to gaze at the ring nestled inside.
It was an oval-cut diamond flanked by two sapphires because Ava loved the color.
It was bold without being too flashy, just like her.
The stone caught the afternoon light pouring through Michael’s living room window.
The ring was beautiful—worthy of gracing the finger of a gorgeous woman. At least, I hoped so.
I was ready to marry Ava. Was she ready to marry me?
I leaned forward, resting my elbows on my knees, and studied the ring as if it held the answer.
The sound of tiny feet thudding against hardwood made me smile.
A little ball of energy was announcing her arrival.
I set the ring box on the couch beside me—gently, like it was made of glass.
“Uncle Linc!” Poppy burst into the room like a whirlwind of blonde curls and pink. She launched herself at me, and I caught her midair with practiced ease.
“Hey, Popstar.”
She giggled at my nickname for her as she settled on my knee.
“You’re getting heavier. What are they feeding you?”
She grinned, revealing a missing tooth. “Mac and cheese all day today… the one from the box because that’s all Daddy can cook. I’m glad Mia is coming home tomorrow,” she sighed.
I laughed. “Take it easy on your dad. At least you’re not starving, right?”
“True,” she said. “He said to give him a few minutes. He’s on a boring call with a man who talks too much.”
I roared. “Was that really the message he sent?”
An impish grin lit up her face. “No, but I know that’s what he wanted to say because he didn’t look happy when the phone rang.”
My laughter filled the living room. My seven-year-old goddaughter had been a hoot since she learned how to talk.
When she spotted the open box beside us, she gasped. “Wow.”
I chuckled. “What do you think?”
“It’s so big,” she whispered, leaning closer. “And sparkly. Is it for Ava?”
My eyebrows elevated. “How do you know it’s for her?”
She gave me an are-you-for-real look. “Because guys give girls diamonds when they want to get married. Daddy gave one to Mia.”
I grinned. “That’s what we do, alright. You think I should marry Ava?”
She nodded emphatically. “Uh-huh. She’s pretty and funny and really nice. And I know she’ll let me be a flower girl.”
I rubbed my jaw to hide my smile. “Ah, so that’s what you’re really after. Being a flower girl.”
Poppy grinned sheepishly. “But everything I said about Ava is true.”
“Very true.” She was indeed pretty and funny and really nice. “I’m sure Ava will let you be a flower girl, Popstar. I mean, you’re a professional. You’ve been a flower girl three times already—in Jamie’s, Alex’s, and your dad’s weddings. Impressive resume.”
“Yup. I’m really good at it.”
I laughed. That’s what happened when a little girl had so many godfathers. I glanced back at the ring. My nerves hadn’t vanished, but somehow, Poppy’s excitement made everything a little clearer.
“Thanks, Popstar.”
“For what?” Her bewildered expression made me smile.
“For making me feel better.”
Her smile of accomplishment lit up the room. She gave me a quick hug and hopped to the floor. “Ava is gonna be happy,” she reassured. “Later, Uncle Linc.”
I watched her skip away with a small smile. That girl couldn’t stay still for five minutes.
A moment later, Michael stepped into the living room. “Hey, Linc. Sorry to keep you waiting.”
“No problem. Poppy gave me your message.”
“Everything alright?” he asked, watching me with concern.
“Of course. I dropped by because…” I looked at the jewelry box.
Michael followed my gaze, and his eyebrows shot up. “Is that…?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Whoa. Really?”
I inhaled deeply. “Really. I was feeling a little nervous. That’s why I found myself here before heading home. But Poppy and I discussed it, and I’m good now.”
Amusement danced across his face. “You talked about getting engaged with my seven-year-old, and you’re good?”
“Yeah. Poppy thinks I should marry Ava, and she said the ring is nice.”
Michael chuckled and shook his head. “Well, I agree. You should marry Ava. Things have been going great with you two.”
“Amazingly.”
“Then what are you nervous about?”
“Her first disastrous engagement… I’m not sure if she’s ready to jump back into another.”
“You’re not her crazy ex, Linc.”
“No, but what if she needs more time?”
Michael considered for a moment. “Only she can tell you that. What I can say is that she seems to be very much in love with you. So, go for it.”
Nodding, I put the ring box back into my breast pocket. “Yeah, I am. Tonight. I’m going to go home, set up a romantic dinner and… do it.”
Michael grinned and stood up with his hand outstretched. “Holy shit, another wedding. We’re falling one by one, huh?”
Slapping his palm, I chuckled. The five guys who agreed in college that there was no happily ever after for us. We were all eating our words one by one for sure. “Do you think Spencer will ever fall like the rest of us?”
Michael snorted. “He’s more of a rake than Alex was, and they were in stiff philandering competition. Maybe when pigs fly…”
I laughed. I never thought I’d get a second chance with the love of my life, and it happened. So, there was hope.
When I got home, the little nervousness that lingered had been replaced by excitement. During the drive home, I replayed the moments Ava and I had shared since she came back to LA. Those memories were all proof that she loved being with me. She’d say yes.
As soon as I got into the apartment, I scanned the room. No Ava in sight. She was usually curled up on the couch writing or reading.
“Ava?” I called out, already loosening my tie.
Her voice floated down the hallway. “I’m in my room!”
I paused mid-step, frowning. Her room?
The guest room had been abandoned months ago. She’d moved into my room.
When I entered the guestroom, I relaxed, understanding why she was in there. The bed was littered with documents. Some were even laid out on the floor. Ava was on her knees, with her laptop perched on the edge of the bed. She’d turned the guest room into her detective hub.
“Hey,” she greeted. Her smile was tight, and her eyes a little too bright.
My eyebrows puckered. “You okay?”
“Uh… yeah…” She looked frazzled with her hair in disarray and exhaustion etched into her face. “Just a little stressed. There’s a lot coming at me right now…” Her voice cracked just a little. If I wasn’t a keen observer of all things Ava, I would have missed it.
I sighed. “Babe, don’t take this the wrong way. You know I fully support you, but maybe… take a break…?”
Her troubled expression had me by her side in a second. I helped her stand and placed my hands on her shoulders. “I know you want to get this done, but you can’t work yourself to death, Ava. I won’t allow it.”
She made a little sound of amusement. “So you’re the boss of me now?”
“Only when I see you doing something that’s not good for you.” I looked around the room, taking in the chaos of information. “You are not doing another damn thing on that exposé tonight. You’re going to unwind.”
“I am?” she asked with skepticism.
“You are… starting with a glass of wine or two while I get started on dinner. I’m making something special tonight.”
“You don’t have—”
My finger landed on her lips. “While I’m setting things up, you’re going to take a nice long bath.”
She sighed. “That sounds good. Your jacuzzi tub is the shit.”
I grinned. “After that, we’ll have a nice romantic dinner.”
“But—”
“No buts.”
“Lincoln, there’s something…”
I waited, wondering why she looked so fucking distressed. Yeah, what she’d dived into was tedious work, but she wasn’t working on a deadline for a paper or anything. She was independent now.
“Okay,” she said. “A hot soak and dinner sound good. The wine too.”
“That’s my girl.” I tilted her chin up and planted a kiss on her mouth.
Once our lips touched, taking things further was like a compulsion.
She opened for me willingly, and I explored her mouth thoroughly, savoring her.
Ava moaned softly, pressing herself against me.
The longer I explored her mouth, the more she relaxed. I practically felt her deflate.
Mission accomplished.
Only then did I pull back. Her smile as she gazed at me was warmer this time. However, her eyes were still cloudy with concern. I was sure my surprise engagement would get her to stop thinking about work for the rest of the night.
After a quick shower, I set out on a mission to prepare a romantic dinner. By the time Ava reappeared after her luxurious soak, I had the table on the terrace set and was taking a dish out of the oven.
“There you are.” I put the dish down and rounded the counter. “You look much more relaxed.”
Ava eyed the iron skillet on the counter. Inside was a perfectly roasted chicken—perfect for my skill level, anyway. Surrounding it was a bed of rosemary and garlic. She then looked through the open terrace door at the other dishes, and the ice bucket with a bottle of champagne.
“Lincoln, not that I don’t appreciate you making me these meals. It’s very thoughtful and attractive.”
I grinned at the latter.
“But don’t you think you went overboard?”
“Not at all. Come on.” I pressed a hand to her back and urged her to the table so she’d stop asking questions. I pulled out her chair and gestured for her to sit. She watched me with a hint of suspicion as I fetched the chicken.
I pulled my chair closer to her and sat. “Everything looks good?”
“Yeah…” Her eyebrows puckered. “Are we celebrating something? Did I forget?”
I chuckled. “No. I just wanted to do something special for you tonight.”
“Okay…” After her suspicion seemed to diminish, she leaned over to give me a peck on the lips. “You’re too sweet. Thank you.”
We ate slowly under the stars and the warm night breeze. The city was alive with thousands of lights below us, enhancing the romantic mood I’d tried my hardest to set. Ava complimented the food, but her usual sparkle was dimmed. She wasn’t teasing me or giving me any sass.
There was no flirtatious back and forth that typically led to us pawing at each other like crazy.
I watched her closely between bites, noting how she pushed her potatoes around more than she ate them.
She kept drifting inward. She was present, but not fully here.
I was starting to worry about the right timing to pop the question…
When she finally leaned back in her chair and placed her napkin on the table, she exhaled. “I’m stuffed. I can’t eat another bite.”
I reached for the ice bucket. “Should I pop the champagne?”
She hesitated and then laughed. “Why are we having champagne? We usually just guzzle down some beer on Tuesday night.”
“We do…” I took a deep breath. “Well, Ava…” Jesus, what happened to the cool guy who was confident about popping the big question? He seemed to have taken a dive over the terrace rails.
I cleared my throat. “We do have something to celebrate… I mean, I hope we do.” I gave myself a mental smack on the head.
Ava frowned. “Lincoln, are you…”
Her eyes bulged slightly when I pushed my chair back and got on one knee. I pulled the box that I’d been carting around for weeks from my pocket.
“Oh, my God,” she breathed.
“Ava,” I said, my voice steady despite my nervousness kicking back in. “I know we’ve officially been back together for a few months, but this doesn’t feel fast to me. It feels like we picked up where we left off.”
Her eyes shimmered, wide and locked with mine.
“I’ve always loved you,” I continued. “Even when we were apart. Even when I tried to convince myself I had moved on. But there was never any moving on from you, from us. You were always the one.”
She inhaled sharply.
“I meant it when I said at twenty-one that I’d marry and give you the world. I just… didn’t get the timing right." My voice became thick with emotion. “But I have my chance now, and I’m taking it. Ava, will you marry me?”
Her breath hitched, and for a moment, her face lit up with pure joy. Her lips parted, and I was sure she’d say yes. I got ready to slide the ring on that special finger and pop the champagne. However, her expression crumbled. “Lincoln, I can’t…”
I blinked.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered.
The silence that followed was deafening and painfully awkward.
I was still on one knee with the ring box open, and starting to feel like I’d made the wrong move.
I shut the ring box with a snap that sounded extra loud in the quiet.
I felt foolish. Had I misread how things were going between us this whole time?
Slowly, I rose to my feet with disappointment weighing me down.
Ava stood too, her movements hesitant and her expression twisted with regret. Her lips parted, then closed again, as if she couldn’t find the words to say what she wanted to. Finally, she said again, “I’m sorry.”
I stared at her, trying to make sense of what was happening.
“Lincoln, I need to… think,” she said.
I wanted to ask what she had to think about. We’d already been through the wringer and found our way back to each other. Wasn’t that enough? The distress in her eyes stopped me from pushing. She looked as if she were on the verge of unraveling. A strange mix of anger and sympathy flooded me.
She turned and dashed away, but I stayed frozen. Even when she came back with her handbag, I couldn't move.
“Where are you going?” I managed, my voice barely above a whisper.
“I just need time,” she returned, her eyes landing everywhere but on me. Then she left.
Every instinct screamed at me to follow her. But for what? To demand answers? Grovel? Beg her to stay? To force her into something she wasn’t ready for? I deflated with a resigned sigh. I had to let her go.
Heartbroken, I sank into the nearest chair and stared at the little box in my hand. Was this how Ava had felt twelve years ago when I walked away from her? Was this payback?
But that didn’t make sense. Ava loved me. I was sure of it. One couldn’t just fake what we’d had since we reconnected. Something must have happened. But what?
As much as it hurt, I knew her well enough to give her the space she asked for. So I pulled out my phone and sent her a text, simply requesting that she let me know she was okay.