36. Max
MAX
My eyes blinked open, and I stared at wispy clouds floating through the blue sky.
Well, fuck.
I definitely lost.
Blood trickled from my nose and over my lip. Obi’s face hovered over mine. His hand gripped both my cheeks, and he moved my head from side to side.
“Ouch,” I said with a grimace.
“Your pupils are responsive,” he said. “You might have a concussion, but I didn’t punch you that hard. You’ll likely be fine.”
Likely. Once again, I was beaten to shit. Why did I keep doing this to myself?
“Is he okay?” Her voice was quiet and small, coming from somewhere over my shoulder.
Oh, yeah. That’s why.
“He’ll be fine.” Obi stared down at me as he stood, and I waited for the verdict to come through. I didn’t pass their test. If I wasn’t already lying down, I might have fallen over with how my gut twisted.
“Well?” Ryuji’s head popped into my vision. “Are you going to get up?”
“Give him a few seconds,” Cas said. “Let him catch his breath.”
Thanks, Cas. Always looking out.
Ryuji shook his head. “Are you going to get up?” he asked again.
“Yeah,” I wheezed. My limbs felt stuck to the grass. “I’m getting up right now.”
My body ached, spent from six fights in a row, and my head throbbed, but they hadn’t done any lasting damage. At least from what I could feel. All my bones were intact, and I wasn’t bleeding besides for my lip and nose. I’d had worse. No big deal.
The worst part was knowing that as soon as I sat up, it would all be over. I meant what I said last night and this morning, that I would not leave her, but I didn’t know exactly what I’d do if they tried to make me.
“Are you?” Wynn urged.
With a groan, I sat up. My ribcage was probably barely holding itself together. I needed a fucking ice bath. “Yep. I’m getting up.”
My hand pressed to my side, and I gritted my teeth while I stood. Maybe this wasn’t over. Maybe I still had time.
“Is the timer done yet?” My mouth tasted faintly of copper.
Ryuji laughed. “Yeah, Obi beat you fair and square.”
I braced myself for their rejection. I wasn’t ready. I couldn’t bring myself to look at her. I had something I actually wanted to fight for. To lose it so quickly…
The Shadows stared at me, but nobody said anything. Not even Cas, who smirked beside Ryu.
Obi extended his hand. I stared at it for a second before I met his handshake.
“Welcome to the Shadows.”
My eyes went wide. “What?”
“You completed the gauntlet,” he answered.
“I lost. Multiple matches.”
“It was never about winning or losing,” he said. “It was about persevering.”
“You didn’t give up,” Ciel said. “That is a win.”
Obi let go of my hand and crossed his arms over his chest with a nod.
“The gauntlet is a test of physical and mental strength. It answers the question: are you committed to this family? If you give up, the answer is no. If you push through each battle, the answer is yes. Completing the challenge earns you your place.”
Ryuji slung his arm over my shoulders, and I winced at the pressure. “Come on, you didn’t think we expected you to beat us, did you? You’re clearly the weakest link.”
“But you just wanted the chance to beat me up, didn’t you?” I pushed back against him, just a little bit.
“That is a perk of the gauntlet, yes.” He looked at Leona and Cas with a grin. “Felt good to hit him, didn’t it?”
The love of my life smiled. “Yeah, even though he tried to take it easy on me.”
“Next time, I promise I won’t,” I said. I looked around at the rest of them. My…family? “So that’s it, then?”
Ciel laughed. “Do you want another test of your loyalty? Obi used to make us hold our breath for two minutes under ice water and then play Russian Roulette before we fought each other. Would you rather do that?”
I shook my head. “Nope. No thanks, I’m good.”
“Then it’s settled,” Wynn said. “You’re in.”
I let out a relieved breath before my throat choked up. Just for a second.
“I…” I started, then stopped. Swallowing, trying to force down the suspicious lump in my throat, I let myself look at her.
She had her hands braced on her waist, and her hip cocked to the side.
Wynn had his arm around her, and she was smiling as she looked at me, and her cheeks radiated with an emotion I hadn’t felt in fucking years.
Pride.
She was proud of me.
This moment branded itself into my brain.
“I want you all to know that this is serious for me,” I finally said.
“I love Leona, but I understand what this group means to each other. I want to be a Shadow. Not just for her, not just to defeat the Camorra, but for all of this. I’ve never had that kind of family before, and I know that’s my fault, but I want that.
She has my loyalty until the day I die, but so do you. ”
Everyone was quiet for a moment, letting my words sink in.
“Outstanding speech,” Ryu said. “How does everyone feel about breakfast? I’m ravenous.”
I huffed, and then a chuckle escaped my lips, and then within a few seconds, I was full-on laughing. I laughed so hard my ribcage rattled, and I groaned through a smile.
“Is he okay?” Ryu half-whispered to Leona.
Leona raised her eyebrows and grimaced, but I cupped her cheeks and pulled her to me for a quick kiss. She clutched at my elbows, eyes wide when I pulled away.
“I’ve never been better.” I wiped some moisture from my eyes. “Literally. Breakfast sounds great, but first I need a fucking ice bath.”