Chapter 13 Willow
“I swear, if that man grunts at me or around me one more time—I’mma flip that silly hat right off his head,” I mutter after Rose and I have dropped off Ellie at school.
I’m deflecting of course. Anything to keep my best friend from picking up the blush in my cheeks. The far-off look in my eyes. Because all I’ve been able to think about for the past hour is that heated blue-eyed gaze on my lips.
The bossiness.
It’s all so . . . dangerously unraveling. Every move Dallas makes seems to be a deliberate challenge to the promises I made myself. Peeling off layer after layer of the pitiful protection I have over my heart. My sanity. My self-respect.
I’m done collecting scars.
And something tells me Dallas Thorne would leave the deepest one yet.
Because for a long moment there, I liked it. The low, gruff command that sent my pulse drumming wildly.
I liked it way more than I want to.
In my stomach, between my legs. Heck, I wanted to keep pouting just for that tone to throw me over its shoulder and teach me a lesson.
Oh, he’ll teach you a lesson all right. That falling again is the fastest way to lose yourself again.
Rose smirks, turning her golf cart onto a local street. “I remember you saying cowboy hats are sexy.”
“Yeah, well, the man under yours fell all over you. Mine is a grumpy, growly, and . . .” I clench my teeth, running a frustrated hand through my hair, “just a big ol’ gorgeous waste of biceps.”
Rose chokes out a laugh. “A what?”
“You heard me.”
“Oh, I heard you call him and his gorgeous biceps yours.”
I give her the side eye.
She gives me a grin. “Besides, I wouldn’t call them a waste—he did build a pretty impressive house with those biceps.”
“It’s about the only thing impressive about him,” I lie.
“Think you should cut him some slack. The man’s been through some life-altering changes in the span of two seasons,” Rose reminds me. “This dad thing is still growing on him and he’s just taking it one day at a time.”
Immediately, I sober up, feeling like a fool for letting my mind go places it shouldn’t when all this man needs is my help. Not to trick me into falling all over him. That’s clearly a “me” problem. “Right. You’re right. It’s why I stayed,” I remind myself out loud.
She squeezes my leg. “And I’m so happy you did. This is going to be great. Now you don’t need to live with your mother—because we all know you’d rather sleep at the bar for a month than her apartment for one night. And you can save some money for a nice elevator building in the East Village.”
“Hmm.” I haven’t given much thought to the “after,” since no one really knows how long this case will go on. And I imagine I’m not going to up and leave once he gets legal custody of Ellie. It’ll be too obvious.
“How much does a nanny gig pay around here anyway?” she asks subtly.
“Double what I was making at the bar, which I thought was pretty steep.”
Rose smirks. “They do pay well. It’s probably why Ginger hasn’t retired. Then again, that woman lives and breathes this ranch just as much as the men do.”
I frown. “I still think it’s too much. Ellie’s in school half the day. It feels wrong.”
“The Thornes aren’t hurting for money. They’ve got the land, the cattle, the guest cabins were full all summer too. They’re not your typical big-city billionaires, but they’ve got money,” she says reassuringly. “And don’t sell yourself short. It’s important, what you’re doing for him.”
“For them,” I correct her. It’s just as much for Ellie, if not more, as it is for Dallas.
Rose glances over, smiling at me politely. “Right.” She presses a button and the ranch gates creak open, slow and wide.
I nod toward the button. “Boy, that thing sure would’ve come in handy that night you stole this vehicle.”
Rose pushes through with a wistful grin. “Where would’ve been the fun in that?”
That’s the difference between Rose and me. She had to overcome some serious struggles to trust men again. But it didn’t stop her from falling hard for Wilder. For trusting him with her safety, and her heart.
A week ago, I would’ve said I wouldn’t be caught dead falling for anyone’s charm again.
Yet here I am . . . letting Dallas slip past every wall I’ve built.
“I’ll drop you back at the house. I wish I didn’t have to go to school today, I’d rather spend time with you,” she whines. “But later, I’m teaching art for kids at the cottage if you want to swing by. Dallas is dropping Ellie off there.”
“I still need to get myself settled and I need to organize those kitchen cabinets. This weekend, Dallas and I sort of shoved things any old place so we could concentrate on the rest of the house before Ellie arrived.”
“Sounds exhausting. You tell your mom you’re staying yet?”
“No.”
“When is she expecting you?”
“Last night.”
“Sounds like you’ve got a call to make when you get home.”
I blink as she pulls up to the estate—the sprawling, endless property, interrupted only by the gentle stream of water that gives the ranch its name and the towering, breathtaking mountains that stand protectively on its periphery.
Home.
It’s after three when I finally gather up the courage to call my mother. I’m slightly annoyed, but not surprised, that she didn’t call to ask why I didn’t arrive last night.
I move to the back porch, finding a little pathway of flowers to follow along the side of the river. It’s chilly but clear out.
I press the phone to my ear, breathing in the quiet, earth-scented air, waiting for my mother’s voice to ruin the peace.
The ringing stops and her voice comes on the line.
“Let me guess, you got your flight mixed up and are calling me to ask me to just drop everything and pick you up from the airport. Well, hop in an Uber, I’m not—”
“No, Mom. I’m still in . . . Colorado.”
“Oh.”
“I’m . . . going to . . .” I sigh, using Dallas’s line again. “Hang here, for a bit,” I say, calm as I can manage. “A job came up, kind of last-minute. Just . . . helping out.”
“Did ya lose the one you had here?”
“No. But this one’s a little more . . . well, it’s important.”
She gasps. “Did you get a gig at some fancy destination wedding? Luxury hotel resort?”
She almost sounds supportive. And I’m going to have to ruin it.
“I’m not singing or playing, Mom. I’m . .
. helping this man. With his little girl.
” I give her the condensed version of my plan to stay and help “Rose’s friend” so he can keep his daughter.
As much as I don’t like sharing someone’s private business with my novel-writing mother—I had to share that part.
Silence stretches on the other end. Then finally, “Single dad? What’s wrong with him?”
“He’s having a rough year.”
“Well, you’ve had a few rough years, who’s going to help you?”
Actually, Dallas is helping me. In a strange way.
For the first time ever, I feel needed. If not wanted. I’ve been given a temporary power here. To save a little girl from being taken away from a father who’s ready to give her the world.
My heart squeezes. It’s almost like the universe is showing me what a real father looks like and giving me the chance to help him be one. Despite my personal doubts and scars.
And even though it’s a far cry from belonging, I feel grounded here, fearless. Like I can breathe. The endless banter with Dallas has me not only defending myself, but confronting demons I’ve been hiding from. Without realizing it, he pushes me to face them.
And for the first time, I want to.
“Mom, please don’t start.”
“I don’t like it, Willow. I don’t like you living with some strange man in a strange town when you’re supposed to be thinking about buying your—” She gasps. “Willow. Oh Willow, please tell me this was your plan all along.”
“What?” I’m almost afraid to hear.
“Marry this man, Willow. But get yourself a prenup, because once you get your money—”
“Mom,” I snap. “There are more important things than money—your one-track mind is exhausting, really. You haven’t even asked how old she is or her name or anything like that.”
She sighs. “How old is she? What’s her name? Tell me all the things,” she adds robotically.
“Forget it.”
“Fine, fine, fill me in on all the boring stuff later, but please think about what I said.”
“I will not. I told you, I’m waiting the four years for the money. I’m not going to ruin someone’s life by tricking him into a—”
“Who said anything about tricking him? It would be an understanding. A marriage of convenience, darling.”
“The only understanding here is your one-track mind, Mom.”
“Well, my one-track mind got me a penthouse on Park Avenue, six number-one bestsellers, and my independence. Your big heart and open mind got you kicked out of six five-star venue gigs and a job as a nanny for a family you don’t know.”
You forgot to mention kicked out of my ex’s apartment.
I blink away the sting in my eyes. Glancing back at the house built for someone else.
“They need me, Mom.”
She sighs again, this time with a sliver of sympathy. “Everyone needs something, Willow. But when will you start taking care of your own needs?”
“Maybe I am,” I mutter. But she doesn’t miss it.
“Is this about the man?”
“No.” How can it be about some brooding cowboy with a stone-set jaw and no-nonsense scowl?
Very easily—that’s how. If my response to that throaty, domineering tone has anything to say about it.
“Good. Plenty of time to think about it later. You fall in love now, you lose everything.”
“How’s that?”
“Use your imagination, sweetheart. Look at what love got you so far.”
I think about my self-defense class. My belongings gone. My pride and self-esteem with it. My heart sinks. The reminder to keep my guard up is like a slap in the face. “No one’s falling in love here, Mom,” I assure her half-heartedly.
“All right then. Love you lots. Take care. Call me when you’re coming home.”
Somehow, her home doesn’t sound as welcoming as the one Rose referred to earlier.
It may not be mine, but there’s a little family counting on me to make it theirs.
My lips curl into a smile. So I’d better get to work.