Chapter 42
Kalia whimpered behind Alus, stifling a sob of fear, and Saer’s mind fast-forwarded, realizing at last.
Of course Kalia told Alus about the last time she and Saer were together—the invoking of her true name.
Saer hadn’t anticipated it, though he recognized his foolishness in that instant.
Again, he tried to move forward, but Gluttony took a step away while guiding Kalia.
Alus extended his free hand, palm forward.
“That’s close enough. She’s terrified of you. ”
Of all things, that statement struck Saer hard enough to steal his breath.
“What did you do, Saer?” The soft question came from Arek at his back.
Saer shoved a hand through his hair while snarling out a quiet curse. He surveyed the ground before ignoring Arek in favor of Alus. “It wasn’t my intent to frighten.”
“Was it to kill her, then?” Alus’s steely gaze threatened with an edge keen enough to cut diamonds.
Saer balked, caught in the lie. The tension in the clearing rose higher.
Alus’s lips peeled back. “Tell them what you did.”
Brow lowering, Saer rejected the discomfort and grappled for anger. “Who are you to make demands of me?”
“I’m your brother, Chief!” The use of the familiar nickname struck a blow to Saer’s umbrage, even if Alus’s teeth bared while yelling it across the clearing.
Alus’s chest heaved, and he swallowed, lowering his voice.
“And Dollface here”—he shook the hand which Kalia clutched—“is your sister.” Some of the twin’s fury ebbed away, a quiet pleading taking over.
“Tell them what happened.” Then, with more backbone than Saer would have expected from Alus, he added, “Or I will.”
Shoved into a corner, Pride stared at Alus. The one they all liked and respected. The one who balanced them—every one of them.
Wreck or relent. Those were the choices left. Destruction always came easier. Saer bowed his head and let out a short, wordless scream.
I could burn you all from the inside out.
The frightening thought sped his heart further.
“Damn it.” Saer fluctuated between balling his hands into fists and extending the fingers, eyes darting on the ground in front of Gluttony and Sloth. He shook his head then glanced at their other kin watching him with caution—even Runeak—as though they could read his thoughts.
He turned desperate eyes back to Alus and, while it grated against his insides like they’d suffered sunburns, he met the challenge. “She wouldn’t tell me where Errshek was. I compelled her.”
Alus’s head tipped forward, his gaze shooting daggers. “Finish it, Saer”
Arek’s breath hitched at Saer’s side. “Alus, don’t.”
A dark sound rumbled in Pride’s throat, resenting Gluttony’s words from beginning to end.
His very nature fought the command. If it were anyone but Alus, he might have attacked them, murdered them, rather than answer.
Runeak shifted, and he distantly acknowledged the space must be thrumming with her aspect.
‘I need to talk to Saer. Not Pride right now.’
The memory resurfaced in his mind, Neyu’s exhausted voice speaking it.
She was trying to help him again, his beloved.
Saer wrestled his innate urges down, but refused to break Alus’s eye contact. That much, he could hold onto. “I used a spark of unmaking to push her, and her true name to order her.”
“So you could get what you wanted.”
“Yes, Alustar,” Saer growled. He had already spoken the worst of it. No sense in holding anything else back. “So I could have my revenge.”
A pause as long as centuries stretched between them. Any progress Saer had made towards regaining a bond with Errshek or, indeed, any of his siblings, crumbled under the admission.
He should have known better to have faith in Alus, the most reliable of the Daemoenica.
With the greatest of care, Alus guided Kalia’s shivering form to his side. He leaned over and whispered in her ear. The demoness shut her eyes tightly and took in a deep, trembling breath. When she opened her tear-steaming gaze, she focused on Pride’s face.
The same twinge hit Saer, the one he’d experienced when he last left her chambers. His anger frayed.
Alus must have seen the change in his expression, because his own ire softened, a drop of the twin’s welcome demeanor settling into his usually laughing eyes. With that same warmth, he spoke just loud enough for all to hear, though the words were for Pride alone. “I trust you.”
He trusted Saer to make this right. And he meant it.
Saer took in a ragged breath, then dropped his gaze back to Kalia.
She was so much smaller than him.
Saer leaned as though he meant to move forward. Kalia stiffened and Gluttony wrapped his arms around her shoulders, whispering further in her ear. Her reaction halted Saer’s movement. He waffled, at a loss.
An internal war waged but this time, Saer pushed past it. Without any grace to the stilted motion, he lowered himself to kneeling and whispered, “Kaliaspher, I’m s—”
Alus cleared his throat with enough volume to interrupt him. The twin peered around to the rest of the clearing suggestively, then returned to him.
Pride growled. “You’re pushing it, Alustar.”
A glowing smile met his threat. Just like that, the Gluttony he had always been shone through. “It’s for your own good, old man.” The smile softened, and he addended, “They all need to hear you say it.”
Saer loathed that he was right.
He dragged his fingers through his hair again, steeling himself. The tightening in his chest wouldn’t loosen, no matter how long he waited.
Hellsfire.
Saer raised his gaze once more to Kalia, who didn’t appear as frightened as she had a moment before. If she could be brave, so could he.
Help me, Neyu.
“Kaliaspher,” Saer said it loudly enough so the entire clearing could hear, but kept his tone gentle. “Kalia. Littlest Sister.”
He remembered how she held him when he grieved for Neyu. When they both did. Shared tears between the eldest and the youngest.
The memory painted his words with the guilt he’d carried since he’d left her sobbing and afraid.
“You didn’t deserve—” The words stuck, and Saer had to clear his throat to restart.
“I’m done hunting. When you, the Twins, Runeak…
” Saer shook his head, a sorrowful growl in his voice.
“All of you were right when you tried to tell me we’d lost enough.
With you, I breached trust the greatest. I didn’t—”
Kalia took a step forward when Saer’s words caught in his gullet.
Saer took his turn to raise a hand in a silent gesture for her to stop.
He used the time he needed to find the words, willing his voice to sound stronger.
“Kaliaspher, I am sorry I hurt you. I won’t tell you I didn’t mean it at the time.
” The corners of his eyes flinched, and he almost lowered his gaze, though he managed to keep it.
“But I can promise to be better. And I swear to you, so long as it is within my will, I will never use the power of unmaking on you again.”
Kalia waited just long enough to ascertain Saer had finished speaking.
It was all she gave before stepping forward again, and this time, no one stopped her.
She extended a shuddering arm towards him in questioning.
Saer turned his own hand, offering, allowing her to put her smaller fingers in his palm.
The contact brought a familiar and uncomfortable squeezing of his throat, a pressure behind his eyes he didn’t want anyone to witness.
Pride.
No reason existed for her to say it. He certainly didn’t feel as though he deserved it. Yet, without breaking eye contact, she whispered for only Saer’s ears. “I believe you.”
He couldn’t move. It felt so tenuous.
Kalia closed the distance for him, just as she had before when he felt close to breaking. When he was broken. She released his hand, then wrapped her arms around his neck. His breath left, and Saer cradled her closer, tucking her head under his chin so he could hug her for all he was worth.
The tension in the space snapped like a harp string wound too tight.
From behind, harried footsteps sounded at the same time Gluttony took off.
Meeting in the middle with a concussive embrace, the Twins collided and buried each other’s heads in one another’s shoulders.
Arek’s hand fisted in Alus’s hair. Alus’s arms held so tight that the muscles stood out, sharp and defined.
Muffled, Arek berated his twin, the strangled tone belying his words. “You idiot.”
Alus’s bittersweet laugh served as a balm to emotional wounds. “It’s good to see you too, Handsome.”
Something between a snarl and a cry came from Greed, heedless of anyone else witnessing the loss of self-control. “If you ever, ever challenge one who can destroy us again—”
“Violet. I got you.” Alus’s sentence was punctuated by Arek’s strike to his back as he continued to hug his twin. Gluttony laughed again, then spoke with the remainder of a chuckle in his warm drawl. “Thanks for holding down the fort.”