Chapter 8 #2
“No,” he said. “No, it’s just… I think that, too. Even other librarians sometimes think I’m a dork for thinking it, but… they are. Libraries are the best thing humanity’s ever thought up, I think.”
He meant that. Of course he did—experienced in public libraries or not, Miles was a librarian. Down to the marrow, I was fairly sure.
“See? I’m just doing a community service. If it happens to benefit a friend…”
Miles’s throat worked as he swallowed, thumb worrying the edge of the flyers. We’d already agreed we were friends, but I wasn’t sure he’d entirely internalized that I meant it. He was my friend whether he liked it or not.
“I want to do it,” I said, determined to convince him. “Besides, people never come in for one drink. Works as marketing for me, too.”
Miles snorted. “Should I be encouraging that?”
“Should you be encouraging people to find community with each other in a safe setting?” I asked, raising an eyebrow. “Isn’t that what librarians do?”
“I told you, I’m a research librarian,” he said. “Not… this.”
“And you’re not even willing to try?” I asked, letting my voice take on the barest hint of a challenge. “Because I dunno, you didn’t strike me as someone who gives up just like that.”
I must’ve struck a nerve then—maybe one I shouldn’t have—because Miles’s fingers tightened on the stack of flyers.
“But it’s okay to say no,” I added in a hurry, afraid I’d overstepped. “If you really don’t want the help. I’m just trying to help.”
“Why?” Miles asked, so soft I might’ve missed it if I hadn’t been so focused on him. He looked up again, lower lip caught between his teeth, brows drawn together like he was hopelessly confused.
Hopelessly confused by a little kindness.
If I’d wanted to wrap him in a blanket and hug him before, it was nothing compared to how much I wanted to do it now.
I shrugged, unsure how to explain to him that being kind was just… something I did. Something people did, around here at least. I didn’t know how else to act. I couldn’t just watch him drowning without jumping in and at least trying to rescue him.
Wasn’t that how everyone was? What kind of assholes had he been hanging around with that this was a surprise to him?
“If you saw me standing out in the rain and you had an umbrella, what would you do?” I asked, making sure to catch his eye.
Miles blinked at me for a second. “Offer to share?”
I raised an eyebrow. “Was that a question?”
“Kind of? I feel like I’m being quizzed here,” he said, looking down at the flyers again. “I’d offer to share, obviously, because—“
He cut himself off but I could see what he’d been about to say. I could also see how much it’d surprised him.
“Because I’m your friend? And you wouldn’t want me to stand out in the rain when there was something you could do about it?”
“Well…”
“So can I leave you with a couple of those and put the rest up around town?” I offered him my most convincing smile. Even Seth fell for it, sometimes.
“You’re relentless,” Miles said. “Do you know that?”
I broke into a grin. “People tell me so.”
“I bet you’re proud of it, too,” Miles said, wrinkling his adorable nose. That tiny smile was back again, though, so I got the feeling he didn’t mind.
“Oh, yeah. Stubborn is my middle name.”
“Does that come before or after Sherlock?” Miles asked.
I laughed. “Booker Stubborn Sherlock Holmes,” I said. “I like it.”
“I like it, too,” Miles said. “I like you.”
My heart stopped for a beat, like it’d tripped over a pebble and stumbled.
“Sorry,” Miles said, so fast it felt like whiplash. “I mean, that didn’t come out exactly like… it sounded weird. I’m sorry.”
Whoever made him feel like he had to apologize all the time, I wanted to have words with them.
“You don’t need to apologize to me,” I said. “For the record, I like you, too.”
My stomach swooped down to somewhere around my ankles as I said it. When Miles’s lips twitched into a smile again, when the light came back to his eyes, though, I was glad I had.
“Well, good. Goes some way to explaining why you’re being so nice to me.”
“Book!” a tiny voice called from the children’s section. I turned to see Maddy waving something with a dragon on the cover.
“Book,” Miles repeated, still smiling. At me.
I’d thought I was past the stage in my life where my insides melted into a puddle of goo when a cute boy smiled at me, but apparently I wasn’t.
“I gotta…” I gestured toward the kids, who were looking at me expectantly. “But I can put up the flyers?”
“Will I ever hear the end of it if I say no?”
“Nope,” I said, grinning at him again, rocking on the balls of my feet like one of the preschoolers waiting for me.
Miles sighed the most put-upon sigh I’d ever heard in my life, but he hadn’t stopped smiling yet.
Making him smile could’ve easily become my new favorite hobby.
“Fine,” he said. “But let me… let me do something for you? There has to be something I could do.”
I considered a moment, and then thought of the perfect thing.
“Come fishing with me,” I said.
Miles blinked at me. “That’s not… the kind of favor I was expecting,” he said. “I don’t know how to fish.”
“Even better, I’ll show you. I’d like the company,” I added. “It’s no fun alone. Plus we’re at the peak of trout season right now. If you hate it, I’ll take you straight home.”
Miles’s perfect pink tongue darted out to wet his perfect bow-shaped lips.
I’d asked too much. He didn’t want to go fishing with an old man, and he’d only been offering to be polite. I’d screwed up.
“Okay,” he said. “Deal. When?”
“Uh,” I flailed, surprised and caught off guard. “Sunday morning work for you?”
Miles nodded once, seriously, like this was an important business negotiation and not a fishing trip. “Sunday morning works. Pick me up…?”
“Eight?” I suggested.
“Eight,” Miles agreed with another serious little nod.
“Book-errrr!” Maddy called out.
“Go,” Miles said, smiling a tiny smile again. “Anything could happen if you make them wait.”