Chapter 58
Chapter Fifty-Eight
Mila
Sitting in a chaise on the balcony, I hold a cup of tea in my hands and stare out at the waves as they crash against each other.
I miss being at the beach. Between the kidnapping and the hospital, with people in and out, I just need a minute to myself.
Kash is as close as ever, not wanting to leave my side for more than a few minutes.
I think the longest he was gone was the day I got out.
He disappeared for two hours, saying he had some things to take care of, and he wouldn’t be gone long.
He apologized no less than twenty times when he came back.
Resting my hand over my stomach, the doctor’s words echo in my head. “With the dosage of the drug you ingested, there shouldn’t be any harm to the baby. You’re early enough that they should be safe.”
Pregnant. I’m pregnant with Kash’s baby, and honest to God, I don’t know what to do.
I truly don’t blame Kash for any of what happened.
It’s not his fault that he has a literal crazy ex, but when I think about how close I came to dying, and our baby along with me, its crushing.
I didn’t even know I was pregnant when everything was happening, but looking back, I should have guessed.
I was tired and emotional all the time, and now, as I stare at the horizon, watching the sun set, I have no idea how the hell I’m going to tell him.
Sure, Kash has expressed interest in having babies and a family with me, but lots of men say things like that.
My God, we haven’t even been dating that long—four or five months at best. Putting my head in my hands, I take a deep breath.
I guess the pill isn’t as effective as I thought it was given that I’m about ten weeks along.
I’ve taken it forever, so I don’t know how it failed me.
Rubbing my hand along my stomach, I smile.
I’m not sad about being pregnant. I’ve always wanted a family, and honestly, I was a bit worried after the way my parents struggled.
I’m just concerned about Kash’s response to it all.
Saying you want kids, and then finding out you’re going to have one, are two completely different things.
It’s different when things become real. Kash could decide he actually doesn’t want this, and then I’d be left with a piece of him and a broken heart.
As soon as the thought comes into my mind, I push it out.
Kash would never abandon me. The man has a location app on his phone, for crying out loud.
I was a bit mad about that when he explained at the hospital that’s how he found me so easily, so I guess I can’t be completely angry.
If it wasn’t for that, I don’t even want to think about what could have happened.
I probably wouldn’t be here right now. We probably wouldn’t be here.
“What are you doing out here, baby?” Kash slides the door closed behind him. Jumping in my seat, I whirl around to look at him.
“You scared me. Don’t do that,” I lightly scold him, then freeze.
He walks toward me in his boxer briefs, not bothering to put clothes on in his search.
His tattooed chest and thighs are fully on display, and a flash of heat goes through me.
His loose hair blows in the evening wind, and he’s wearing his glasses.
His eyes light up when they find mine, and I’m suddenly a lot less worried.
Offering me a small smile, he leans down and kisses my head, nudging me lightly to make space. “Sorry. I woke up and saw you were gone and panicked. Don’t do that. You should have woken me up. I don’t like sleeping without you.”
Standing up to move, I tug my shirt down. Kash halts my movements when I stand and he takes my spot on the lounger. He tugs me into his lap, draping my legs across his. He wraps his arms around me with a soft look. His brown eyes are locked on mine. “That’s better.”
As I lay my head against his chest, I debate on when I should tell him about the baby. Should I wait until everything is settled with Bri, or should I do it now? Just rip the Band-Aid off and tell him, Hey, guess who has a bun in the oven? Us.
Listening to the steady thrum of his heart, I smile.
“What’s funny?” Kash interrupts my thoughts. “I can feel your smile against my skin.”
Pulling back to look at him, I shrug my shoulders. “Nothing. Just taking in the moment,” I lie.
His chest rumbles. “Well, I hate to cut this short, but I have dinner planned for us. How long do you need to get ready?”
Thinking it over, I almost ask if we can stay in, but stop when I see the hopeful look on his face. Kash always wears his heart in his expressions. I don’t have it in me to deny him. “Maybe twenty minutes? Is that okay?”
Kissing my lips softly, he pulls back and stands with me in his arms. I loop my arms around his neck and lean up to press my mouth against the side where my tattoo rests. I feel Kash shiver beneath my touch, then giggle when he groans. “Small change of plans. We’re going to be late.”
He seals his lips over mine with a searing kiss.
It’s full of heat and promise. Kash opens the door easily, then walks us straight to the bedroom, his mouth never leaving mine.
Once inside, he places me gently on the bed and runs his hands up my thighs, pulling my shirt as he goes.
Leaning over me, Kash gives me a filthy look right before he takes my lips again.
“We’re going to be very late.”
We end up being almost an hour late, but it was worth it. Since the incident happened, and I got out of the hospital, it’s the first time I’ve felt like myself. I feel like we’re just a normal couple on a trip together, not one who’s hiding from someone trying to kill them.
With his fingers threaded through mine, Kash holds my hand and walks us toward the beach behind the house we’re renting.
It’s way too big for both of us, and when I pointed that out to him, he just shrugged.
I’ve vacationed here enough with my parents to know it's not cheap.
North Carolina has so many beautiful beaches; this one is no exception.
The sun already set a while ago, but it’s a gorgeous evening.
The waves crash against each other, the swash hitting the sand.
The moon and stars are on full display, and it reminds me of the night we froze during the meteor shower.
Kash lays out a large blanket, gesturing for me to sit.
Settling in, I inhale the salty air and watch as he unpacks a few pasta dishes.
“I ordered these while you were getting ready. There’s a little Italian place nearby and they remind me a bit of La Stella’s.” Handing me a warm container of pasta, Kash smiles sheepishly. “I had this going a different way, but after our nap, I kind of got sidetracked.”
That’s an understatement. I almost needed another nap after we were done being sidetracked.
Accepting the food and silverware he hands me, we eat in silence for a few minutes.
The noodles are perfectly al dente, and the sauce is just acidic enough.
Before I realize it, I’ve eaten almost the entire container.
Setting it down, I grab a bottle of water, avoiding Kash’s gaze.
“You must have been really hungry.” He laughs.
“Hush. I lost a lot of calories today.”
“Burned, baby. You burned a lot of calories today, and you enjoyed every moment.” He gives me a knowing smirk. He’s not wrong. I definitely enjoyed burning those calories.
I smile and take another sip of water, then recap the bottle.
Leaning back on my elbows, I stretch my legs in front of me and enjoy the feeling of my feet in the sand.
Just watching the surf roll in and out makes me feel utterly at peace.
Maybe I should tell him now. Biting my lip, I glance at him from the corner of my eye and find him staring at me.
“What?”
Clearing his throat, Kash looks around the blanket. “Are you finished? Did you get enough to eat?”
Nodding, I pat my stomach. “Oh yeah, I’m definitely full. Thank you for dinner.” Leaning forward, he meets me partway, and I place a soft kiss on his lips. “I appreciate you, Casanova.”
Kash glances down at my hand, then quickly looks away. Grabbing the containers, he puts them back into the tote he brought with him and sets it off to the side. He widens his stance on the blanket and holds out his hand. “Come here, Sunshine.”
Crawling between Kash’s legs, I nestle against his chest. I’m fully content as he presses my back to his front, arms wrapped tightly around me. Resting his head on my shoulder, I wrinkle my nose as loose strands of his hair tickle my face.
“I miss your longer hair.”
“Do you now?”
Nodding, I twist my hand back, threading my fingers into it.
The strands are growing out, but it’s not the same.
He could be bald and I’d still love him, but I do miss watching him tie his hair back.
Clenching my thighs, I ignore the flash of heat that settles in my gut, choosing instead to stroke the soft strands.
“You’re handsome either way, which you know, but I liked it.
I was sad when you cut it. Even though I understand, in a way, why you did it. My mom likes you, Kash.”
Pulling my fingers from his hair, he shifts behind me. “I was hoping she would,” he admits softly. “Your dad is another story.”
Snorting, I lean my head back against his collar bone. Looking at Kash’s face, he stares at the water as I explain, “My dad is protective. I think he appreciates the way you beat Jake with that bat though. You rescued me and protected me the best way you could. Even now, you’re still doing it.”
Meeting my eyes, Kash dips his head and kisses me softly.
It starts out sweet and slow, his tongue teasing my lips, but as soon as I open with a sigh, he takes full advantage.
The kiss quickly turns heated, his hand cupping the side of my face, holding me where he wants.
Heat floods my core, and I wonder how much longer we have to stay out here. I’m ready to go to bed, again.
Pulling back, Kash’s eyes dart between mine, as if he’s memorizing my expression.
His thumb strokes my cheek as he leans down and presses his lips quickly to mine one final time.
Lifting his head, Kash adjusts me so I’m back to being pressed against his front.
I almost whine at the loss of contact, but then he moves his hands again.
Threading his arms around my torso, I feel Kash twining his fingers through mine. I’m about to suggest we go inside when I feel something cold touch my hand. Glancing down, I watch in the moonlight as Kash grabs my left hand and slides a ring down my finger.
“Kash,” I start.
“Mila,” he answers, his chest vibrating against my back.
“What is this?” I lift my hand in his and stare at it in the moonlight. Either I have a concussion, and I’m seeing things, or this is a ring.
“I think you know what it is, Sunshine.”
“Kash, I—”
His fingers grab my chin, tilting my head toward him.
I see my reflection in the lenses of his glasses, and I’m glad I look as stunned as I feel.
His large hand cups my cheek, and he gives me a look that’s full of love.
“Mila, I need you to marry me. I don’t want you to marry me because a want is something you can live without, and I can’t live without you,” he murmurs.
“I need you to be my wife and spend the rest of your life with me. I need you to have all of my babies and let me love you how I know you need. I need you to be mine.”
“Kash,” I whisper his name like a prayer as a tear rolls down my cheek.
Lowering his mouth to mine, Kash kisses me sweetly and pulls back. “There are billions of people on the planet, and the only person meant to be mine is you. It was written in the stars, Sunshine.”
Tears stream down my face freely, and Kash takes a moment to softly wipe them away with his thumbs.
I haven’t even told him I’m pregnant yet, and he’s proposing.
I know everyone will say it’s too soon, but if recent events have taught me anything, it’s that life is meant to be lived.
Smiling at him, I nod. “Okay, Casanova. I’ll marry you, on one condition. ”
Grinning, he presses his forehead against mine, his breath skirting across my face. “Name it.”
Pulling his face closer, I stop with our lips a hair width apart. “Take me to bed, Future Husband.”