Chapter Eighteen
Mya
I kind of hated the two days a week when Benji went to preschool. The socialization was good for him and making friends and learning, but I got teary every time I had to drop him off. It was only two hours, but I missed the little guy.
My first paycheck was…scary. It had been a long time since I’d had access to money of my own, but I did need some clothes. Real clothes. Most of what I had packed to run were things that Jacob bought for me.
That meant halter dresses and tube tops, mostly. Pants with provocative sayings splayed over my ass in glitter and gemstones.
As soon as I had some new things, those were going straight into the trash.
With my two hours to myself, I went to a thrift store hoping to find some casual things to wear. Could I afford to go shopping for higher-priced things? Yes. Was I going to waste my money, especially with my car in the shop? No.
The local thrift store had a big selection, and I ended up buying everything I needed. Plus, I found Benji a couple of outfits and some lightly used toys I thought he would like, including a little tree trunk that housed a family of bears. And some books.
On my way back to the car, I noticed a little bakery and popped in.
They had freshly baked ham-and-Swiss croissants, and I thought Benji would like one for lunch.
Plus, I picked up some cheesecake brownies for dessert that night.
I felt bad about that morning. I had no qualms about the things I’d said, but maybe stomping into the driveway, boobies out, in my pajamas maybe wasn’t the best way to handle it.
Once I picked up Benji, I got to hear all the preschool gossip. There was a girl named Holly who tried to hold Benji’s hand, but he didn’t like her voice so he didn’t hold her hand back. There were tears but he shrugged it off.
“Did you tell her you were sorry?”
Another shrug. “I not sorry. She talks like this.” He proceeded to speak in a very high-pitched voice about flowers and watering cans. “I wanted to play trucks.”
Fair decision.
“I got you something for lunch while I was out, and a new toy. We have to clean it up, but it should be fun.”
Preschool tuckered Benji out. He fell asleep on the way home and while he finished his nap on the couch, I cleaned up the toy set and got his lunch ready.
That I’d noticed, the little guy didn’t turn his nose up at any food and singlehandedly kept the dairy food group in business. A full glass of milk in every meal.
When he got up, he was wiping his eyes, and I noticed his chin quivering. I wrapped him up in a hug. “What’s wrong, Benji? You can tell me.”
“I was dreaming about Mama.”
Heart broken. “Can you tell me about it?”
“She was pushing me on a swing. I could hear her laughing.”
I kissed the top of his head. It must’ve been awful to mourn his mother at such a young age. “Maybe she was visiting you. In your dream.”
“Can we look at the pictures of Mama?”
“Absolutely.”
I held him on my hip while we made our trip down memory lane through the hallway.
He pointed out the people in the pictures and talked about his mama.
He had limited memories, since he was so little when she passed, but I’d heard firsthand how Grey talked to him about her.
Telling him that she loved him and was so sad to go.
Grey missed her too. He didn’t say much about it but his eyes told the whole story.
“Lunch now?” I asked after we’d gone through the photo album Grey kept on a low shelf for Benji to access anytime he wanted.
“Lunch and toys.”
“What a great plan. After that, I think it might be pool time.”
That suggestion earned me a butt-wiggling dance and fists in the air. I hoped he never outgrew his whimsy.
Benji loved the bear family set, and I left him upstairs to play while I put my thrifted clothes into the dryer.
That was when I heard the crash. I’d never run so fast. I was up the stairs in a flash and in the doorway. Toys and books were everywhere and then on the bed was…a bear cub. A live brown bear cub.
“Benji!” I screamed, looking for him everywhere while avoiding the animal on the bed.
My first insane thought was that I’d somehow bought an enchanted toy and one of the bear family had come to life. I needed to stop watching paranormal movies.
“Benji, where are you?” I sprinted through the house, but as I did, some things came together.
How in the world did a bear come in? And get upstairs?
The window was intact. And where in the hell was Benji?
Did the bear eat him? Bears didn’t eat people.
Did they? Oh my goddess, I’m the nanny and I let a bear eat my charge.
I went back to the room to see the bear cub bouncing all over the room and pawing toys, tearing up the comforter and pillows and roaring like it was his full-time job.
“I’m so fired. There’s a bear in the house, and I can’t find the kid.”
In the middle of coming unglued, the bear came over and I froze in place. It wrapped itself around my leg in the exact way Benji had the first time he saw me. I looked down and in the bear’s eyes, I saw Benji.
“No. Mya, this isn’t possible. It can’t be…”
Except it was. Call it intuition. Call it insanity.
Call it delusion of the third kind. I crouched down slowly as the bear cub lay at my feet.
My chest warmed, and a scent wafted toward me.
The scent of Benji. Butter cookies and peanut butter and honey.
How he had always smelled to me. “Benji? Is that you? Oh my goddess, are you?”
“Mya?” Greyson’s form filled the door at the exact moment I picked up the bear cub and held him. How was this possible?
“Grey?” I said on the verge of tears. “It’s Benji.”