Chapter 16
Cassie snuggledinto the covers as the memories of last night flooded back to her. She smiled, remembering how Jesse had reacted to her being naked in his bed. The way his body felt pressing her into the mattress.
He’d kissed every inch of her before pinning her to the bed and filling her. Sex had never been like this before for her. She’d never been so…overwhelmed by sensations flooding her senses.
The space beside her was empty, but it was still warm from where he’d been. She ran her hand over the sheets, letting her memory of the night play out in vivid color. Cassie didn’t want to forget any of it. Ever.
The shower was running in the bathroom. Cassie imagined the water flowing over his body, caressing his muscles, begging to be licked, and felt heat build between her legs. She wanted him again. She wanted to join him in the shower and let their bodies take over.
But was that something he’d want?
Cassie hated the fact she was second-guessing herself. She didn’t want to screw this up.
Before she could decide, the water shut off. She’d missed her chance.
A few minutes later, the door opened, and Jesse walked out, rubbing a towel over his hair. He wasn’t wearing a stitch of clothing. Her gaze trailed over his body, taking in the dips and planes she was becoming familiar with.
She must have made a noise because he turned and caught her staring. One side of his mouth quirked up. “Enjoying the view?”
Heat bloomed on her cheeks. A denial was on the tip of her tongue, but she decided against it.
When she didn’t respond, his smile grew. He crossed to the bed, leaned over, and captured her lips with his. The kiss was soft and slow but lingering. By the time he backed away, she was aching for more.
She had no idea when she’d become a sex fiend. It must have been somewhere between him fingering her and him taking her up against the wall. Or maybe it was when he’d explored her pussy with his tongue as if he’d never tasted anything better.
Jesse stood to his full height beside the bed. It brought his now not so flaccid cock within inches of her face. She had a sudden desire to know what he tasted like.
He grazed his thumb along her jaw and tilted her chin up to meet his gaze. “There’ll be time for that later. This morning, there are things we need to talk about.”
A strange disappointment mixed with trepidation filled her belly. “Talk?”
He nodded and released her. “Shower and dress while I make us breakfast. Then, we can talk.”
Without waiting for a response from her, he went to the closet to get dressed.
Cassie flipped off the covers, padded to the bathroom, and closed the door before he reemerged from the closet. She tried to figure out what he wanted to talk about, then she recalled the discussion they had in the car before dinner. Her family. He thought she didn’t want him to meet them.
To be honest, it had nothing to do with him and everything to do with her mom. Jessica Rourke was a lot to deal with sometimes. She loved her mom, she really did, but since she’d divorced Cassie’s dad and remarried David, she’d changed.
Mom was great for the fun stuff. She and David loved to party. Not in the get drunk and do drugs sort of way, but in the carefree, don’t worry about tomorrow way. At one time, Cassie thought she wanted to be that way, too.
She still remembered her dad’s reaction to her sneaking out of his house when she was seventeen to go to a party. Let’s just say, Cassie had never done that again. Not even at her mom’s. She’d been too afraid her dad would find out somehow and she hadn’t wanted to chance it.
Then, of course, there was her brother, Bradley. While he was great at being a pain in her ass and would insert himself into her private life if he took the notion to, she was confident Jesse could handle him.
No, it was her mom who had her dreading the eventual meeting. She liked Jesse. A lot. She wasn’t sure how to be a good submissive, but she was trying. What if her mom said something to mess things up between them?
Cassie took her time in the shower and got dressed. She knew she was dragging her feet, but she couldn’t bring herself to rush.
The condo was quiet when she made her way into the main living area. She could smell food, but Jesse wasn’t in the kitchen or the living room.
Her stomach rumbled, pulling her attention back to the food. At least, that’s what she told herself. The truth was, Cassie wasn’t looking forward to the conversation ahead. She was beginning to realize Jesse and her dad had something in common. When they decided it was time to discuss something, it was impossible to deter them. But that didn’t mean she couldn’t try to delay it as long as possible.
She followed the smell of food to the oven. It was turned off, but she could feel heat radiating off it. She opened the door to peek inside.
“Sneaking around?”
Cassie jumped as if she’d been caught with her hand in the cookie jar. Clutching her chest, she turned to face Jesse. “You scared me.”
“I noticed.” He strolled over to the counter, picked up two oven mitts, and opened the oven door Cassie had let slam closed when he’d startled her.
The casserole dish he removed bubbled with cheese and had her mouth watering. “Take a seat at the table. I’ll get this dished up and bring it over.”
She waited while he carried the food to the table, then placed a large scoop onto her plate. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome,” he said, then served himself.
He let her get a few bites in before getting directly to the point. “Why is it you don’t want me to meet your family? Or do you not want your family to meet me?”
“Neither?”
His only response was to raise a questioning eyebrow.
Cassie blew out a breath. “It’s not that I don’t want you to meet them. I mean, I’m nervous about it, but I know if we stay together, then you’ll have to meet them eventually.”
He waited for her to go on.
“My brother, Bradley, is a royal pain in the ass. He’s stubborn like my dad, but unlike my dad, he always seems to think the worst of people. I think being a lawyer has jaded him.”
There was no response from Jesse.
“Then here’s my mom. As soon as she meets you, she’s going to be planning our wedding. She’s a romantic and gets caught up in the idea of love. I introduced her to Trent, and a month later, he was proposing.”
“You believe he proposed because of your mom?” Jesse asked.
She shrugged. “I don’t know. She was all over him, talking about the perfect wedding venues and how she wanted to meet his parents. Get to know her daughter’s future in-laws.”
Her revelation was met with silence. He chewed his food and swallowed, then took another bite.
Several minutes passed before he spoke. “Anything else?”
“Isn’t that enough?”
To her surprise, he chuckled. “Cass, neither your mother nor your brother is going to push me into something I’m not ready to do. Nor are they going to scare me away. If that’s what you’re worried about, then you don’t need to be. I have no issue with your mother discussing wedding venues or even wanting to meet my parents.”
Cassie opened her mouth, then closed it again. What did he mean by that?
She tried not to read too much into it, but her mind began to wonder. They’d both said they wanted this relationship to be more than a casual fling. He’d been very clear about that. But they’d only known each other for a couple of weeks. She wasn’t even sure if she could be the submissive he wanted her to be.
“I can see your mind working overtime. You’re worried about something. Tell me what it is.”
She met his gaze across the table and tried to put how she was feeling, her uncertainty, into words. “I’m not sure how to do this.”
He cocked his head to the side. “Eat breakfast together?”
That made her laugh. “No.”
“What, then?”
“I’m not sure how to be your submissive. I’m supposed to do what you tell me to do, but then I get so caught up when you touch me that I forget everything but how it feels when I’m with you.” Cassie lowered her gaze. “I don’t want to screw this up.”
* * *
Now they were getting to the heart of the issue. Her family. His family. All of that was a smoke screen to what was really bothering her.
“Cassie, do you feel you can’t be yourself around me?”
She lifted her head to meet his gaze. “Sometimes.”
He put his fork down and held her gaze. “Why do you feel you can’t be yourself?”
“You want me to be submissive.”
“Did you like it when I put you over my knee and spanked you?”
She started to speak, then stopped herself. Then, she began again, only to again remain silent. He waited her out, deciding to resume eating his breakfast while she gathered her thoughts.
Several minutes later, she sighed, and he returned his fork to his plate. “I shouldn’t have.”
He understood her confusion. It had been years since he’d played with a submissive who was new to the lifestyle. Sometimes, they had problems reconciling themselves to enjoying submission. The modern world screams women should be aggressive and go after what they want. Letting a man dominate them, and liking it, seems like something they should run away from.
But he had no doubt in his mind Cassie was submissive. Her reaction to his spanking was proof of that. Not to mention how she’d responded to his other dominant behaviors in the bedroom.
He knew he was going to have to push her out of her comfort zone. The sooner she admitted her needs to herself, her desires, the better off they’d both be. “We all have needs, Cass. It’s not something to be ashamed of.”
“But it’s embarrassing.”
Jesse raised his eyebrows in question. “Why is it embarrassing?”
“Things aren’t supposed to be that way. Women aren’t supposed to want that anymore.”
“Do you think I’d ever force you to do something you truly didn’t want to do?”
She thought about it for a moment before answering. “No.”
“What we do isn’t something you should be embarrassed about as long as it’s something we both want and enjoy. Most people don’t venture outside of the norm when it comes to relationships and sex and to me that’s a pity. Learning your partner’s needs can be extremely fulfilling. It can also bring them closer. We’ve only been together for two nights and already I know how your skin flushes as you near orgasm. I know the way your body shakes right before you come. And I know how to make you shiver with need just from running my lips along your neck.”
He watched a shiver ripple through her body and knew she was turned on. That hadn’t been his intention, but he’d take it.
“I don’t want you to ever feel like you can’t come to me with what you need. My job as your Dominant is to make sure your needs are met. But I can’t fix something I don’t know about. So if there’s something bothering you, I need you to come to me.”
She took a calming breath and nodded. “All right.”
“Good.” He picked up his fork again. “Now eat your breakfast before it gets cold.”
He finished eating and waited for her, not wanting to rush her or pull her into another discussion. Once they were both done eating, they cleaned up their dishes and moved to the living room. They had no real plans for the day and that was perfect, in his opinion. He needed time to decompress after the week he’d had at the office.
Settling onto the couch, he pulled her against him, tucking her into his side. They needed to talk, but he was willing to do this at her pace. For now. He was hoping, however, she’d understand the importance of communication and push the conversation forward herself.
Several minutes passed before she twisted into the cutest little pout. “If there’s something I want to try, then I can tell you, right?”
“Of course.” He paused. “It doesn’t mean we’ll do it, or maybe not immediately, but I always want to know what you’re thinking.”
Cassie nodded. “When I was doing research on BDSM, I noticed the Doms tended to use a lot of…toys on their submissives.”
She paused as if she were expecting him to answer a question she hadn’t asked. Instead, he let her statement hang in the air, waiting.
“You’ve never used any toys on me.” She paused again but seemed to realize he was going to sit there until she put words to her question. “Why is that?”
Instead of answering, he asked a question of his own. “Is there a particular toy or implement you wanted me to use on you?”
“No.” She paused. “Maybe.” She paused again. “I don’t know.”
He pressed his lips together, trying not to chuckle. She was so cute when she was flustered. “The reason I haven’t used any toys on you is because you’re new to this. I wanted you to get comfortable with our dynamic before I introduced you to toys.”
“Oh.” He was hoping she’d go on, but she didn’t.
“Tell me what you’re thinking.”
“Do you already have the toys?”
“Yes.”
She inhaled.
He ran the tips of his fingers down her arm, then up to her shoulder. She leaned her head against him, letting her eyes flitter shut. He continued to brush his fingers up and down her skin, letting her think and feel. This was new to her, and he was okay taking things slow. He planned on them being together for a long time. There was no need to rush.
“What toy is your favorite?” Her voice was soft, but it rang clear in the quiet room.
“I have several favorites, but if I had to choose one, I’d go with a flogger.”
“That’s the things with all the long leather strings, right?”
He grinned. “Yes. The long leather strings are called falls.”
“Why’s it your favorite?”
Jesse liked this inquisitive side of her. “A flogger has a lot of versatility. It can be used in a more traditional way for flogging or spanking, but it can also be used to create a soothing sensation by running the falls over the skin.”
“Does it hurt?” He heard a note of unease in her voice.
“That depends on the flogger and the one using it. Some floggers are heavier than others.”
“And the heavier ones hurt.” She said it as though she was stating a fact.
“No. The lighter ones tend to sting whereas the heavier ones have more of a thud to them.”
She turned in his arms, bringing their noses within inches of each other. “I don’t think I’d like the stinging ones.”
“I don’t know. You seemed to like the sting of my palm on your ass.”
Cassie didn’t answer right away, but he saw her pupils darken. She really enjoyed her spanking the other night. He was going to have to remember that. Something told him she’d be spending a lot of time across his lap in the future.
Her eyes drifted closed again and she brought her hands to rest on his chest. “Why am I equally curious and scared?”
“Because it’s new and you have no point of reference. For what it’s worth, I think you’ll like floggers.” He lifted her and placed her onto his lap, putting her in the same position she’d been in when they were at the lake. This time, however, they didn’t have anyone watching.
She tilted her head back, resting it on his shoulder. “Why’s that?”
Jesse ran his hands along the inseam of her jeans. He would have preferred her to be wearing a skirt, but he could adapt. “Because you like impact play.” He grazed his fingers over her denim-covered pussy and continued upward, dipping under her shirt.
Her only response was a low hum.
Tilting her head to the side, he ran the tip of his nose along her neck, then captured her earlobe with his teeth. She was putty in his hands, even if she didn’t realize it.
He cupped her breasts, kneading them in his palms, the lacy fabric scratching his fingers. Her nipples hardened as the pressure in his own jeans began to build. He wanted to suck on her tits, but that would come in time. They had all day. There was no need to rush.
She arched her back, pushing her breasts into his hands, silently begging for him to increase the pressure, to give her more.
Instead of giving her what she wanted, he removed one of his hands and popped the button on her jeans. The zipper released as he slid his hand inside, burrowing beneath her panties until he found her wet heat.