Chapter 26 #2
"With Mom, everything feels like it has to be special or planned perfectly. Like she's trying to fit a whole relationship into one weekend." Emma's voice grew stronger, more confident. "But with you, it's just... normal. Like you actually want to be here."
"I do want to be here, Emma."
"I know. And that's what makes it different." Emma looked directly at Sandra. "Can I tell you something kind of personal?"
"Of course."
"I used to worry that if Dad found someone, she might not like me and Toby. Or that she'd try to replace Mom." Emma twisted her hands in her lap. "But you're not trying to be our mom. You're just... Sandra. And that's exactly what we needed."
Sandra felt tears prick her eyes. "That means everything to me." She thought back to seeing Emma glancing several times at the mother braiding her daughter’s hair. She hesitated, then plunged ahead. “Can I tell you about my mom… well, my parents?”
Emma’s eyes immediately widened, but she nodded. “Yeah… um… sure.”
“Well, it’s just that I understand a little about how you feel. My parents were older when they discovered they were having an oops baby—”
Emma’s mouth flew open, and a little laugh slipped out. “Oh my God, Sandra… you too?”
“Yep… I was very unplanned. Now, like your parents, they loved me dearly, and even though they didn’t always show it the way other parents did, I knew I was loved.”
“How did they show it… or didn’t show it?”
“My parents were very scholarly. University professors. They loved reading ancient law texts, attending lectures, and hosting other ancient history and law professors, along with a few students for dinner. My mom couldn’t have made a chocolate chip cookie if her life depended on it…
” Sandra stopped and laughed. “Well, maybe she could have, if the recipe was written in Latin or ancient Greek.”
Emma laughed, her eyes twinkling. She settled back, now seeming to enjoy Sandra’s story.
“I was encouraged to read, but my parents didn’t sit with me and read stories together.
I was encouraged to play, but my parents didn’t toss a ball or go swimming with me.
I was encouraged to have friends, but I didn’t have sleepovers.
” She placed her hand over Emma’s. “My mother never braided my hair.”
Emma sucked in a quick breath through her nose as her lips pressed together. “You… you saw? At the pool?”
Sandra nodded. “Yes. And it was then that I realized you and I have some things in common besides our taste in yogurt and mystery novels.”
A tentative smile curved Emma’s lips.
“You see… my mom never braided my hair, not because she didn’t care. But she didn’t know how, and it wasn’t a skill she thought about learning.”
“Were you sad?”
Sandra thought about the question, knowing Emma deserved honesty.
“Sometimes yes. But my family seemed normal to me, and I knew I was loved. They expressed it in other ways than some of my friends’ parents.
They didn’t take me prom dress shopping, but they did take pictures of me in my dress, and my dad told me I was beautiful.
I suppose that you feel that way when you think of your mom. ”
Emma nodded, her brow furrowed. “But I have my dad, and he does all kinds of things with Toby and me. He read to us when we were little and cooks for us… although he doesn’t make chocolate chip cookies!”
“No, maybe not, but I have it on good authority that he brings you cookies from Bess’s Bakery.”
Laughing, Emma enthused, “Yes!”
As their mirth slowed, Emma peeked up at Sandra as though she wanted to ask a question but hesitated. Sandra gave her a moment, and Emma finally asked, “Would you mind if I talked to you sometime? You know… about girl stuff… or friend stuff… or just… I don’t know… just… stuff?”
The trust being placed in her hands felt enormous and precious. "Emma, I would be honored if you felt comfortable talking to me about anything. Anything at all."
Emma's smile was radiant. "Good. Because honestly? You explain things better than most adults. You don't make everything sound scary or embarrassing."
"As long as your dad and your mom have no objections, I want you to feel like you can come to me with questions. Any questions."
"Even the really awkward ones?"
"Especially the really awkward ones."
Emma launched herself forward, wrapping Sandra in a fierce hug. "I'm so glad Dad found you. We all needed you, even if we didn't know it."
Sandra held her tight, feeling the significance of this moment. "I needed you guys too."
Later, lying in Terry's bed with her phone pressed to her ear, Sandra gave him a rundown of their day. She could hear his smile as she described Toby's pool antics and their movie night.
"And Emma?" he asked. "She seemed thoughtful when I talked to her earlier.”
Sandra hesitated, then told him about their conversation. When she finished, silence stretched on the other end.
Terry finally heaved a sigh. "While it breaks my heart that Emma doesn't have the kind of mom who makes time for those conversations, I'm grateful she has you now."
Sandra felt tears prick her eyes. "She's incredible, Terry. They both are."
"And they care about you. I can see it every time you're all together."
His words reached inside her, filling places she didn’t know were empty. Letting out a shaky breath, she decided to turn the call back to something less emotional. "We miss you, but we're having fun. Tomorrow's beach day, then you'll be home."
"Can't wait. This conference is good, but I keep thinking about you three."
When they finally hung up, Sandra lay in the dark thinking about Emma's words and Toby's unconscious acceptance. And Terry’s… love? Is it love? She knew what she felt for him and hoped he was feeling the same.