Chapter 31
‘Are you sure you don’t want me to stay on to give you a hand?
I feel awful leaving you like this.’ Standing in the middle of the Pennycress kitchen, Nicola looked around her.
Crammed onto every tabletop and inch of work surface were strewn the contents of the cupboards: crockery, spices, tins, packets of food.
Everything you could imagine should be stored in a kitchen filled every available space.
‘Nope, you go. Escape while you can.’ Laura laughed as she leaned against the work surface, a large saucepan in one hand and a packet of pasta in the other. ‘And I’d run before you find the doorway blocked by packets of cereal.’
Nicola looked from Laura to Jackson, who was busy cleaning out the cupboard nearest the kitchen door.
‘Honestly go. We’ve got this under control.’ Jackson smiled at her, a cloth in one hand and a jar of salt in the other.
‘Okay.’ Grimacing, Nicola backed away, however guilty she felt in leaving them, she was also grateful to be spared an evening of overtime, cleaning out cupboards.
Ever since Jackson had moved in, he’d been itching to rearrange the kitchen, but she hadn’t realised his idea of rearranging would be quite so intense and she didn’t think Laura had either. Maybe it was a chef thing?
‘If we don’t answer the door in the morning, send a sniffer dog, Nic. We’ll likely have been crushed by the baked beans or trapped in the spaghetti or something,’ Laura called after her.
Jackson chuckled. ‘Give me an hour and it’ll all be sorted.’
Nicola laughed as she closed the front door behind her.
For some reason, today had been a long day.
It wasn’t as though she’d had any extra work to do or anything pressing to deal with.
In fact, now the Landownes’ wedding was over and the carnival too, things had gone back to normal.
All she could think was it was because she hadn’t been sleeping that well, tossing and turning until late.
Part of the reason being that she and Charlie had slipped into the comfortable routine of spending time together every evening, and the other part was simply the fact she was taking longer to actually get to sleep than she normally did.
Up until recently, she used to be able to fall asleep within minutes of her head hitting the pillow – even during her break-up from Nathan she’d been able to sleep – but now, every time she closed her eyes, her dreams were empty.
She was struggling to picture a future with Charlie.
A future where a long-distance relationship could work out.
Each time she convinced herself, his voice would echo in the back of her mind, reminding her that his previous relationship had ended due to both of them working too many hours, due to lack of time together.
How was their relationship supposed to overcome that same issue when they were over a hundred miles apart?
And when she did eventually fall into a deep slumber, she’d wake up hours later, not quite being able to recall why, but deep down knowing she must have been dreaming about her and Charlie’s relationship failing.
Clicking the wrought-iron gate at the end of the front garden closed, Nicola snapped her head up as she heard her name being called. It was Jill pushing a sleepy Kasey in his buggy. Holding her hand up in a wave, she waited until she’d caught up with her. ‘Hi, Jill.’
‘Hi, I was hoping I’d catch you.’ Peering over the handle and hood of the buggy to the child inside, Jill sighed and carried on pushing it back and forth.
‘Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you. I’m trying to get this horror off to sleep.
Willow has some friends over for a sleepover and so he’s refusing to settle, knowing there’s more exciting things such as eating popcorn and painting each other’s nails going on downstairs, so I’ve left Gerald at home and we’re off on a long walk. Isn’t that right, Kasey?’
Kasey turned, burying his face in the knitted dog toy he was holding.
‘Aw, good luck with that.’
‘Haha, I think I’ll need it. I’ve already lapped the village twice.’
Nicola smiled. She didn’t know how Jill did it. She was always so calm despite juggling a million things.
‘Anyway, I’m glad I’ve caught you. One, because now I don’t have to walk on my own, and two, because I was going to check with you if you think Charlie will be happy for me to come and collect all the carnival paraphernalia sometime this week.’
‘Oh, um, yes, I should think so.’ She shrugged.
‘Good. I don’t want to leave it all in his barn.
He took some persuading to agree to lend us the trailer, so I don’t want to take advantage and put him off the idea when next year comes along…
’ Jill stopped mid-sentence and looked across at her friend.
‘Sorry, I didn’t think. He’s become such a part of this village that I keep forgetting he’s planning on leaving soon. ’
Nicola shook her head. ‘Don’t worry. You and me both, to be honest.’
‘Ah, it must be tough to have met someone, knowing he won’t be around much longer.
Still, think of all those weekends spent in the big lights of London.
’ Jill grinned. ‘I’ve always thought how nice it must be to be able to spend time between the city and a place like Meadowfield.
The two extremes, really. You know, you hear about all these commuters living in flats in London during the week and then coming to their country houses for weekends and holidays. ’
‘Yes,’ Nicola answered, trying her best to inject as much enthusiasm into her voice as she could.
The truth was, it didn’t sound like a dream scenario at all, it sounded like quite the opposite.
She just wanted to be with Charlie. Full time.
She didn’t want to settle for snatched days here and there.
‘That’ll be you two, won’t it?’ Jill shushed Kasey as his eyes began to close.
‘I suppose it will.’ Nicola spoke quietly so as not to disturb the small toddler. She could always trust Jill to find the positives in any situation. ‘Still, it’s not going to be the same as having him down the road.’
Jill shook her head solemnly. ‘Yes, that will be a difficult transition.’
‘Uh-huh.’ Nicola nodded.
‘But it’ll be worth it.’ Jill leaned into her friend, giving her a quick hug. ‘Once you’ve both got used to it, it’ll work so well. I’ve got a really good feeling about you two.’
‘You have?’ Jill had always had a knack of calling out her ex-boyfriends, of telling her she should walk away and that they weren’t right for her, that she deserved better.
And she had a hundred per cent track record of being right so far, Nathan included.
‘I think that’s the first time you’ve ever said you could see a future with me and someone I’m dating. ’
‘Ah, well, there you go then. Believe me.’ She tapped the side of her nose as they began walking again. ‘Seriously though, you and Charlie, I can see you going the whole way with him – marriage, kids, settling down.’
Keeping her eyes fixed on the path ahead, Nicola nodded.
That’s what she wanted, what she dreamed of when she let herself.
But the truth was, there were just too many obstacles standing in the way of them having a proper relationship, let alone marriage or kids.
‘That’s going to be pretty difficult when we don’t live anywhere close to each other. ’
‘It’ll happen. Mark my words. Who was it who said love could conquer all?’ Jill shook her head. ‘I can’t remember, but it’s true.’
Nicola took a deep breath in. ‘Maybe you’re right.’
‘I’m always right.’ Jill grinned.
‘Haha, you have been so far.’ As they reached the entrance to The Twistle, Nicola paused. ‘I’d invite you in for a cuppa, but I’m guessing you want to push through until he’s fully asleep.’
‘Oh yes, this is the sleepiest he’s been on my’ – stretching her arm out, Jill checked her watch – ‘two-hour walk. And I’m not giving up yet.’
‘Okay, see you tomorrow.’ Nicola waved to Kasey, who, despite looking as though he was ready to drop off, had seemed to perk up a little now the rhythm of the buggy moving had paused.
‘Oh yes, I’ve ordered some new plants for the bottom of Pennycress’ garden. You know, down by the bird table? I can’t wait to see what they look like once I’ve got them in.’
‘Sounds good. Catch you tomorrow.’ Nicola waved before turning and heading to her cottage. She felt better after her conversation with Jill. More hopeful.