Chapter 51
Jameson makes me come like no other man ever has. He did it first with his tongue, then again against the window. Roughly. Now I’m lying in his arms on the brand-new couch, both of us sweaty and breathless.
“So, what would you think about actually looking into starting that inn?”
“What?”
“It was your dream to start one one day, wasn’t it?”
“When did I tell you that?”
“The first time you took me to look at houses.”
“I did, didn’t I?” I’d completely forgotten about that.
“Yes. I tucked it away in my memory bank for later, because the look on your face became so wistful and dreamy when you mentioned it. You certainly don’t look like that when you talk about doing real estate or working at the restaurant.”
I glare at him. But I know he’s right. He does too.
“Yeah, well…I don’t really do anything important at the restaurant.”
“He wants you to take on a bigger role, but you don’t want to. Why not? You’re almost done with that business degree, what were you planning on using it for?”
Oh, we’re getting deep now. Okay. I shift so I’m on my back with him beside me. I can feel his gaze on me, but I stare up at the ceiling.
“I don’t know, honestly,” I admit quietly.
“You have other dreams.”
“Maybe. But I can’t just quit everything on a whim and risk my whole life for a silly fantasy that will probably fail.”
“You don’t know that. Besides, if you don’t try, then you might always live with that regret.”
“People love to say that,” I sigh. “But you know what’s scarier to me than not trying and living with that regret?
Going for your dream, giving it everything you’ve got, and still failing.
And then living with the knowledge that you just weren’t good enough and your dream will never be.
I think I’d rather live with the regret and the wondering. ”
He stops tickling my side. “That’s a very pessimistic way to look at it,” he chuckles softly. “I’ve honestly never thought about it that way.”
I shrug. “Welcome to my brain.”
“Well, there’s one flaw in your logic.”
“What?”
“You can always try again. And again.”
I sigh. “Sounds exhausting.”
He chuckles.
“I can help you. I have some experience with starting new businesses.”
“Do you? And here I thought you were just an unemployed drifter.”
He laughs again and leans down, placing his lips against mine.
“Mmmm,” he groans. “You may be obsessed with my cock, but I’m obsessed with these.”
He kisses me again, then pulls back, smiling down at me.
I look into his eyes and suddenly, I want to say it. It should be the easiest thing. I feel it so deep in my bones, but I haven’t said those words to any man in a long, long time. Not since I became a mom.
“I…love you,” I whisper. “So much it hurts.”
His smile fades as he cups one side of my face. His expression shifts to something I can’t quite name. But I think it means he feels the same. It makes my stomach twirl, and my breathing turn shallow.
“I love you too.”