Chapter 11 Lofton
LOFTON
Me: Is it okay if I go out to the barn?
I felt bad about texting him so early, but duty called. He must not have been asleep because his reply was almost immediate.
Devon: Yes.
The sun remained hidden behind the horizon as I stepped onto the porch.
I drew in a deep breath, a smile breaking across my face.
Only a girl who had grown up on a farm would be nostalgic over the scent of grass, manure, and hay.
Six a.m. came early, but I loved this part of my day.
I hadn’t shared that affection as a teen, dragging myself out of bed before school to do chores.
But as I’d gotten older, I’d learned to appreciate the peace before the rest of the world awoke.
With Dad’s bedroom window nearby, I took the wooden steps as quietly as my paddock boots would allow. When I got across the driveway, I heard water running in the barn.
Shit. Salty had probably broken the automatic waterer off the wall again. Last time, he flooded half the barn before Jenn realized what he’d done.
I took off running, praying I would not be spending the rest of my day digging out wet stalls.
I rounded the corner of the barn and then stopped dead.
Devon stood at the wash rack at the other end of the barn, the hose arched over his shoulder as a stream of water cascaded down his body.
Running shorts hung low on his hips. No shirt.
No shoes. No warning whatsoever. A small toiletry bag and towel sat on a nearby stool while he rinsed soap from his hair.
Oh.
My.
God.
Water rolled down his muscular chest, tracing the hard lines of his abs before disappearing into the waistband of his shorts. His thick biceps flexed each time he lifted the hose, sexy veins running along his forearms.
My traitorous brain immediately returned to the fantasy I’d had of him in jeans and a tank top. The universe had clearly taken that thought and said, Hold my beer.
He turned toward me, and I quickly ducked out of the doorway, plastering my back to the side of the barn. I wasn’t sure if I was trying not to get caught so I wouldn’t look like a creep, or so I could buy myself more time to keep watching.
“What are you doing up so early?” he asked.
Dammit!
I swallowed hard, relying on my acting experience more than ever as I rounded the corner, stepping back into the barn. “Oh, nothing.”
Yep. That’s what I said. I needed to return my Oscar immediately.
He arched a brow.
“I mean, nothing special. Just feeding the horses.”
“Right.” He dropped the hose, turned it off, and then grabbed the pink towel I recognized from my bathroom. His muscles gave the most brilliant show as he dried off.
And like a dope, I stood there, biting my bottom lip as I watched his every move.
“You okay?” he asked.
“Yeah. Totally.” Desperate for a distraction, I grabbed a lead rope off the hook by Salty’s door.
It served absolutely no purpose when it came to feeding, but I couldn’t put it back without looking like a fool.
Wait. Correction. Without looking even more like a fool.
So I just hooked it over my shoulder and kept my hands—and eyes—busy by collecting feed buckets.
“Any particular reason you’re showering out here? ”
“Worked out, needed to get cleaned up.”
“You know there’s a shower in the house, right?”
“You were asleep.”
“So?” I twisted my lips and made the mistake of looking at him again.
His abs rippled as he dragged a hand through the top of his short, brown hair, water droplets flicking off the ends. “You needed the sleep. Didn’t want to wake you.”
“Oh, please,” I laughed, hoping to jumpstart my lungs again. “I used to sleep through Jenn blasting death metal. I think I can handle you taking a shower.”
He chuckled, rich and sexy, which was deeply inconvenient for the moan I was barely suppressing.
Eyeing me carefully, he slipped his feet into a pair of Nike slides and then walked to a duffle bag resting on top of Zoey’s pink and purple trunk outside Snickers’ stall. “You sure you’re okay?”
No, I was not okay. I was drooling over my bodyguard who was indeed a dick…most of the time.
Except for last night, when he’d curled his hand around my neck, causing chills to explode across my skin.
His gaze had been so tender as he searched my face, vowing to keep me safe.
It had been equal parts sweet and dangerously sexy, the kind of touch that made my brain short-circuit.
One second he’d been his usual grumpy professional, and the next he’d been standing too close, his fingerprints branding my skin.
I couldn’t help myself when I’d followed him into the bathroom, acting like I was getting ready for bed just to see if he was as affected by the moment as I had been.
I wanted more of the guy who was funny and sweet, teasing me about show choir and sharing stories from his past.
But, if I were being honest, that wasn’t the only “more” I’d been thinking about.
I aimed a Lofton Beck specialty smile his way. “I’m fine. Coffee wouldn’t hurt, though.”
His face fell flat. “And that’s my cue to leave.
” He carried his bag to the barn’s tiny half-bathroom.
“I don’t know anywhere in this town that would have a quad-shot blonde espresso over ice with sugar-free vanilla syrup and liquid stevia so it doesn’t taste like candles. You are on your own there.”
I bit my lip to stifle a laugh. “I’m impressed you remember my order. I’m still sorry about that. It was a tough morning and—”
He lifted a hand to interrupt me. “No apology needed. We all have off days. Though you ever want to right a wrong with me, there’s nothing I won’t forgive for another one of those pizzas from last night.
” He gave me a chin jerk and then shut the door to the bathroom, simultaneously putting me out of my misery and robbing me of my sexy little peepshow.
Silently chastising myself, I made a mental note to make another pizza crust and then got busy in the feed room, prepping buckets of grain and supplements. I had just finished dumping the horses’ breakfast when Devon reappeared from the bathroom.
Tight jeans.
White t-shirt.
Brown work boots that had clearly never seen a day of actual labor.
My mouth dried.
He dropped his bag on the concrete aisle and scanned up and down the barn. “All right. Where should I start?”
“Start what?”
He slanted his head. “I thought we were feeding the horses?”
“You don’t have to help. That’s not your job.”
“No, but we need to go over some things, and I figured we could knock ‘em out at the same time.” His gaze snagged on something hanging beside Snickers’ stall. He walked over, grabbed the lead rope, and slung it over his shoulder, mirroring me.
My lips pressed together.
Mr. Observant Bodyguard must have clocked when I’d grabbed Salty’s and decided a lead rope over the shoulder was a necessary part of the routine. I didn’t have the heart to tell him otherwise. Honestly, it was kind of adorable.
“Do you have experience with horses?” I asked.
He planted his hands on his hips. “Not particularly. The closest thing I ever got to farm life was a petting zoo in elementary school.” He paused and winced. “A llama spit in my face.”
My eyes widened. “Wow. A llama and my dad. You must have one of those faces.”
He shot me a bored scowl, but the twitch at the corner of his mouth betrayed him.
Before I got caught in his web of gorgeousness again, I got my feet moving. “Well, you should be safe out here. None of our animals spit.” Finished with his breakfast, the old gray gelding hung his head over his door. I slid under his neck, rubbing his muzzle. “This is Daddy’s horse, Salty.”
Concern filled Devon’s face. “Jenn said he bites.”
Grinning, I put my hand under his mouth.
His lips flapped over my palm, gently searching for a treat.
“Jenn was giving you shit. He’s a good boy.
At least from the ground. He used to be a handful under saddle.
Dumped me more than a few times. But he and my dad clicked.
Nobody’s been on him in years. We like to say they retired together.
” I reached down and slid the lock on his door open.
Devon backed away as the horse exited his stall. “Wait, wait, wait…don’t you need to put this thing on him?” He lifted the lead rope my way.
I patted Salty on the rear end as he casually lumbered past us toward the open pasture gate. “Nah. He’s spent twenty-five years on this farm. He knows the drill.”
I moved to the next stall where an aptly named chestnut pony nickered and leaned into his door, ready to follow his pal. I scratched the white blaze on his forehead and slid open his lock. He trotted out, whinnying for Salty.
“That’s Snickers. He was my first show pony. I swear he could win a crossbar class with a sack of potatoes on his back. Zoey rides him now. It scares the crap out of Brooke, but that little girl caught the horse bug hard.”
Devon kept a watchful eye on Snickers until he met up with Salty at the round hay bale in the field. “I’m with Brooke on this one. Animals that size are far too unpredictable for my comfort.”
“No more unpredictable than people.”
“True. But I don’t trust many of them either.”
“Touché.” I moved on to the next stall.
While the barn had room for twelve, it had been years since there had been more than a handful of residents. “And this is Beans.” A donkey came running out, braying as he raced to catch up with his crew.
Devon’s brows furrowed. “Jenn rode a donkey?”
I barked a laugh. “As much hell as she gave my parents when she was growing up, it wouldn’t have surprised me if Daddy got her a mule.
But no, nobody rides the donkey. He’s a companion animal.
We got him a few years back after we almost lost Salty to a scary colic.
Horses are pack animals and don’t do well when alone.
So, with the two horses getting older, Beans is here just in case one dies. ”
“Damn. Farm life is darker than I expected.”
“You have no idea.”
Walking toward the pasture gate, I peeked into their stalls as I passed, each one looking and smelling worse than the last. “Jesus, this place is a wreck. I’d bet ten bucks all of them have thrush by now.”
Devon pursed his lips. “I hate to turn down a crisp Hamilton, but I don’t know what that means.”
“Let’s just say Jenn is great with Dad, but she did not catch the horse bug, so feeding and turnout is the height of her contributions over here.
I’ve been paying some guys to come in before Dad wakes up to muck the stalls, but by the look of things, they’ve skipped more days than they’ve worked.
” I continued talking as I closed the creaky pasture gate.
“I wonder if Daddy ran them off or if Jenn just isn’t staying on top of them? ”
“That is one of the things we need to discuss.”
I turned to face him. “The farmhands?”
“Me acting like a farmhand. You said I needed to look the part. But how should I interact with your father? He’s going to be seeing a lot of me. And after yesterday…” he trailed off.
I sighed and returned Salty’s rope to his stall door. Devon followed suit with Snickers’.
Sinking down onto Zoey’s trunk, I peered up at Devon.
I wished like hell that I had an answer for him.
My entire life Lawrence Beck had been a teddy bear. Kind, compassionate, firm yet patient. He believed in hard work and second chances. He was fiercely protective of his girls, but never walked out of the house without a wide smile and pep in his step.
That wasn’t who he was anymore, though.
We got glimpses of that man from time to time, but the light in his eyes had dimmed. His confusion often led to anger and frustration, causing outbursts where he’d often turn on us, becoming mean and hateful. It broke my heart every time.
He was still in there, though, so Jenn and I lived for the moments of clarity. Praying for flashes of our missing father, even as he sat directly in front of us.
My nose stung as I peered up at Devon. “He has good days and bad days. Yesterday… wasn’t great.”
“Yeah,” he said gently. “I know that couldn’t have been easy for you, so maybe you can help me figure out how to avoid that in the future.”
I swallowed hard. “I wish I knew. He doesn’t do well with strangers.
In the past, when I’ve hired people to help clean this place up, he either heads outside to work beside them or loses his mind and cusses them out.
It’s a coin flip, which is why we try to do everything around here on our own.
Looking the part will definitely help, but it’s far from a guarantee. ”
“Okay. And he relies on you and your sister pretty much twenty-four seven, right?”
“No, he’s not helpless. I don’t have to monitor his every move or anything like that.
” Using the toe of my boot, I brushed away the wood shavings that had escaped the stall.
“He still comes out here sometimes to groom the horses or fiddle with things that don’t really need fixing.
” My throat tightened. “Though Jenn told me he’s been sleeping more lately, so she runs errands during his naps.
The doctors warned us that would happen.
” I stared down at the ground, blinking fast as the reality of our limited time with him settled heavy in my chest.
Devon said nothing right away. Instead, he lowered himself onto the trunk beside me; the wood creaking under his weight. He didn’t touch me, but his quiet presence was strangely comforting.
He swayed his head from side to side as if he were weighing his options. “Okay, so if he’s sleeping a lot, I can stay out here when he’s awake. The house is safe, and if anything goes down, I’ll still be close. That should give him space and keep our contact to a minimum.”
Genuine gratitude blazed in my eyes. “That could work.”
“It’s gonna have to.” He bumped me with his thigh. Not quite the personal moment we’d shared in my bedroom, but warm and friendly all the same.
A comfortable silence fell over us as we sat there, the sounds of crickets and frogs serenading us in the background.
He finally sighed and scrubbed a hand down his face. “I didn’t need the rope thing, did I?”
I smiled. “No. And if you had any idea how many times the horses have pooped on that wash rack, you’d never take your shoes off there again.”
“Oh-kay,” he drawled, shooting to his feet. “Right, well, what time does your dad usually get up? Because suddenly I need another shower.”
“Not until at least nine. Come on, while you do that, I’ll make you some breakfast before I banish you from the house for the day.” Without thinking, I extended my hand, and without hesitation Devon took the cue and pulled me to my feet.
It was something so simple and casual, and yet the moment his fingers wrapped around mine, something shifted between us.
Nothing big or dramatic. Just… noticeable.
And if I’d noticed, I had absolutely no doubt Devon had too.