Chapter Twenty-Nine
Indi
As I bury myself deeper in the article detailing my history with Caleb and the deaths of my parents, my phone buzzes beside me. I wipe at my tears and glance down at the screen.
Kenzi: Address. NOW!
For a moment, I stare at the message. Maybe it’s finally time to stop being so terrified of being judged and let someone be there for me.
Exhaling shakily, I send her my address, then turn my attention back to the article.
‘Indica was always the love of Caleb’s life,’ says the source.
Apparently Caleb wanted to spend the rest of his life with her.
She was his forever girl. But Miss Malone was destined to break the budding musician’s heart.
This may seem like a bad thing, but in our eyes, it means more musical genius songs of heartbreak and despair for the upcoming band, Staked.
The song “Saving Grace” was written especially with Miss Malone in mind and details their unstable past. The two lovers, with their on-again-off-again relationship, were always bound to end in heartbreak for poor Caleb, who is now said to be trying to mend his shattered heart.
Indica ended things, and now Caleb is left picking up the pieces while Indi moves on without him.
What will become of the rising star? Only time will tell. Time heals all wounds, and broken hearts make great music.
I scoff and slam my laptop shut, shaking my head in disbelief.
He’s made me out to be the villain. I can’t fucking believe this.
Storming over to the window, I stare outside, not even knowing what to do with myself anymore.
My bottom lip trembles violently while my insides shake.
Somehow, this betrayal feels even worse than him sleeping with Sally or Sandra or whatever-the-fuck her name was.
After everything I told him about wanting my past buried, he’s gone and handed it to the press because I hurt his feelings.
What a shallow, selfish, childish prick.
I pace my bedroom while images of my parents flash relentlessly through my mind. I bite down hard on my lip, desperately trying to remember their happy smiles instead of the faces haunting my nightmares.
The dead ones.
Dad foaming at the mouth. Mum pale and lifeless with blood dripping from her wrist.
I cradle myself tightly as panic grips me.
My breathing speeds up until I feel like I might hyperventilate.
No matter how hard I try, I can’t calm myself down.
I keep pacing, sucking desperate breaths through my mouth, trying to force oxygen into lungs that suddenly don’t seem to work properly anymore.
Closing my eyes only makes it worse.
The darkness behind my eyelids twists into the horrific images I’ve spent years trying to suppress. Dad collapses again. Mum reaches for me again.
Blood.
Foam.
Death.
I scream as tears pour down my face and collapse onto the floor in a trembling heap, curling into myself while sobs rip from my chest.
I hate him for this.
Hate that he dragged my past back into the light and forced all these memories to the surface again.
I force my eyes open to escape the images of my parents, but instead, I’m assaulted by memories of Caleb kissing me against the door, touching me in my bed, looking at me like I was his entire world.
Everything is too much.
The grief.
The betrayal.
The heartbreak.
I roll onto my side until my cheek presses into the soft carpet and cry harder than I ever have before. My gaze locks on the bedroom door where Caleb kissed me so passionately that it stole my breath.
Just like now.
I can’t breathe.
Snot bubbles from my nose while tears soak the carpet beneath me, but I can’t pull myself together. The pain is unbearable. My chest aches so viciously it feels like it’s crushing me into the floor, and my breathing grows so shallow I don’t even know if I’m still breathing properly anymore.
I close my eyes again, and the horrifying images flood back instantly. Scrunching my fists into my hair, I tug hard enough to hurt myself, desperate to make it stop. But nothing helps. Everything is too overwhelming, and I have no idea how to escape it.
“Indi?”
The voice sounds far away, muffled beneath the roaring in my ears.
“Jesus, Indi…”
Warm arms suddenly wrap around me, lifting me from the floor and cradling me tightly against a body. I don’t even know who it is, but they’re warm and safe, and I cling to them desperately while their hands rub soothingly up and down my arms.
“Shhh… it’s okay. You’re okay. I’m right here.”
Whoever it is sinks onto the floor with me still wrapped in their arms, and I crawl into their lap like a frightened child.
“Hey, just breathe for me, okay?” the voice says gently. “In and out. Nice and slow.”
I stutter in a shaky breath before exhaling slowly, trying desperately to follow the instructions while clutching onto them.
“Goddamn girl, I told you not to read the article.”
The familiar voice finally cuts through the panic.
Kenzi.
My heart gradually slows while my stomach settles slightly as she continues rubbing soothing circles over my arms.
“Kenzi?” I croak.
“Yeah, babe. It’s me. I’m here.”
I loosen my death grip on her arm and stare down at the angry red marks already forming on her skin. “Shit. Sorry.”
“Hey, I don’t give a crap about bruises,” she says firmly. “What I care about is getting you back onto planet Earth with me.”
Sliding awkwardly out of her lap, I wipe at my swollen eyes and finally look at her properly. Concern is etched all over her beautiful face, her dark brown eyes full of worry.
“I’m so sorry you had to see me like this,” I whisper thickly. “It’s been years since I had a breakdown this bad.”
She exhales softly and takes my hand, squeezing it tightly. “I’m just glad you finally gave me your address. I’d hate to think what could’ve happened if I hadn’t found you. Thank God your front door was unlocked.”
I shake my head weakly. I must have forgotten to lock it last night. Looking at Kenzi now, with her flawless black hair and perfectly winged eyeliner despite the early hour, I can’t help feeling like an absolute disaster beside her.
“Why did you read the article, Indi?” she asks gently.
“I don’t know.” I shrug miserably. “You telling me not to made me want to know what was so bad.”
“You are the most stubborn woman I’ve ever met.” She stands and offers me her hand. “Think you can stand?”
“Yeah. I think so.” Taking her hand, I let her help me onto shaky feet. I inhale deeply while she glances around my bedroom with a small smile.
“You know, Indi, you had absolutely nothing to worry about. Your place looks a lot like mine.”
I know that’s a blatant lie, but the fact that she’s trying to make me feel better softens something in my chest. “Thanks, Kenz. For being here.”
She smiles warmly before slapping my shoulder lightly. “Well, sister, I am a nurse. Mental breakdowns and people losing the plot are kinda my specialty.”
A weak laugh escapes me. “I did lose the plot there for a bit, didn’t I?”
“I was two seconds away from calling the wagon with the straitjackets.”
My brows shoot up.
“Kidding, Inds.” She grins. “Mostly.”
I exhale shakily while wiping my cheeks again.
“So… I brought brownies.” She disappears into the living room while I take another deep breath and follow her. Thank God she isn’t making a huge deal out of what just happened. She’s the only person besides Caleb’s family who knows about my past.
Well… not anymore.
Now the whole fucking world knows.
I walk into the living room and immediately spot the giant box overflowing with brownies. Honestly, I might love her a little bit more right now.
“Come sit down,” she says, patting the couch beside her. “You can tell me all about last night. Or not. Whatever you want.”
I sink beside her and grab a brownie without hesitation.
I don’t care that it’s barely seven in the morning.
I need chocolate. Slowly, I tell Kenzi everything.
Caleb admitting he slept with her, leaving him stranded at the funfair—every painful second of it.
Kenzi listens quietly through all of it, absorbing every word.
She’s honestly the best listener I’ve ever known.
Then again, she’s also the only real friend I’ve ever had besides Caleb.
We met my first day working at the hospital. Kenzi had already been there for a few years and basically ran the place because if there’s one thing about Kenzi, it’s that she loves bossing people around. She immediately took me under her wing and has basically bossed me around ever since.
We clicked instantly.
I was the quiet girl who never spoke to anyone, so eventually people stopped trying with me—everyone except Kenzi.
Whether she kept pushing because she was supervising me or because she genuinely cared, I’ll never know.
But I’m grateful she did, because despite us being complete opposites, we somehow fit together perfectly.
She balances me out, and I calm her down whenever she gets too hyped up about something.
An hour passes with me crying on and off while Kenzi repeatedly curses Caleb’s name and threatens to shove his wilted roses up his ass. I’m finally starting to calm down when there’s a knock at the door.
Kenzi’s eyes widen dramatically. “Bet it’s him here to grovel.”
“Kenz—”
“Let me answer it and tell him I’m your lesbian lover.”
“What? No!”
Laughing wildly, she races toward the door before I can stop her.
“Kenzi, stop!”
But she’s too fast.
“I’m her lesbian lover!” she announces proudly while yanking open the front door. Then she freezes. “Oh.” She steps back slowly, eyes wide.
“What? What is it?” I ask, instantly tense.
She looks at me with panic all over her face. “Indi, don’t come over here.”
“Kenz?”
She starts trying to close the door, but I rush forward and catch it before she can.
Two photographers stand outside my house.
The second they spot me, camera flashes explode.
“Indica! Is it true you broke Caleb’s heart and already moved on with a woman?”
“What’s your name, sweetheart?” one of them yells at Kenzi.